Father’s Day. My kids called, but did not have much to say. Leslie took me for a very special breakfast to a restaurant that her father introduced her to in Guatemala. We both miss our dads terribly and both of us have shed tears today.
We are both sick. I must have caught a bug on the airplane. Leslie and I have terrible colds and hope to be better by tomorrow.
I made fish for dinner with a nice salad. Yum!
Hopefully we have the coffee situation sorted for tomorrow. I made us an omelet, which turned into a scramble. Yum! We had shawarma for lunch, no carbs. So far I think today is going well.
Leslie and I are officially licensed to get married. Unfortunately Monday is a federal holiday, so we have to try to do it Tuesday. Good things come to those who wait!
For breakfast I had an impossible sausage sandwich from Starbucks, and lunch was dim sum (all chicken). So tasty!!
I do not live in Dallas… but that’s where my fiancée lives, and wherever she is, I am home. There was doubt as to whether I would get here, and that doubt has weighed on us both for months.
Until July of last year I was living in California. I was on a work visa that came to an abrupt end when I lost my job. Thanks Covid. In normal times I would have packed up and gone back to Canada. These were not normal times, and the border was essentially closed. I made the best of things. I took some online training contracts, I played a lot of golf. I then took a mid-term contract with Microsoft. Life went on.
As soon as flights between Canada and the US started up again, I booked a flight to go visit my children. I had not seen them for nearly two years, and that was the first thing that came to mind. I booked a round trip ticket, figuring I would go to Canada, come back to the US, and then close out my affairs so that I could move back to Canada. The only problem was that when I tried to enter the US, I was denied entry. Covid shmovid… I had stayed in the US without status, and that was a no-no. I was not excluded from the US, simply told to stay in Canada for six months and then come back for a visit.
To say that was a stressful event is underselling it… but I got through it, got my affairs in California closed out, and I got my life in Canada back on track. I was getting close to Leslie at this point, and she was dealing with her own crap… but she was living my crap too. I do not know if things would have gone so well between us had it not happened… but here we are, ten months later, engaged to be married.
Over the course of those ten months, Leslie came to visit me frequently. Truly, while we both put the effort in, it was her boots on the ground that got us here. Of course, at a certain point she started to get miffed that it was her boots coming to Canada, and that I had not visited her. These conversations started before the six month waiting period ended, and I had to remind her that it was not my choice, but rather the US Government’s.
It was mid-February when that period ended. My ambivalence did not end there though. I was not doing a lot of work because I am still waiting for my security clearance, and I knew that the Customs and Border Patrol officers would not look favorably on my situation if I was not working. In truth, I was scared. I am certainly not the time to shy away from my fears, but at the same time, I did not want to rush the issue… that is, I was told to wait at least six months, and I did not want to show up on six months plus one day.
Around mid-April we talked about it. Leslie came to see me in April and we were going to Cuba together in May; she was likely going to come to Canada for my birthday in July, so that left… June. I looked at Leslie’s custody schedule, and I booked my flight for… yesterday, as it happens.
Great, right? No. Well, yes… but my employment situation had not budged, and I now had anxiety that I would get turned away again. The last ten days really the anxiety started to build, and while I tried to hide it, Leslie is a very perceptive woman, and she figured it out. The last four days were very hard for both of us.
There was nothing anyone could do… I had to show up to the airport, check in for my flight, go through Security Theatre, and then stand in the extremely long line to speak to an officer. There was nothing else… believe me, we had tried.
Knowing that after that long line I was going to be brought into the back screening office, I decided to arrive at the airport extremely early for my flight. I was comforted in the knowledge that I had nearly five hours to get everything done… and thank G-d I did because it took nearly that long! The initial line at Immigration was two hours long. I was escorted by the officer to the screening office and told to have a seat. That lasted another forty-five minutes before I was called. Outwardly calm, but my insides were doing somersaults.
Did I mention that when you are in that screening room you are not allowed to use any electronic devices? No phone, no tablet, nothing. You sit there waiting for an agent to call you. you play games, looking at the other people waiting around you, trying to guess what their stories are.
Officer Ortiz called me up and he asked me my story. I told him. I named the officer who had denied my entry last year, and explained the situation that led us to where we were. He told me he knows the officer, and is surprised that he had not tried to trap me in a lie. I told him that he had, and that the good thing about not lying is that there is no lie to trap me in,
We had a very good conversation. I answered all of his questions, and skied a few of my own. As I predicted, the moment he stamped my passport, the anxiety drained out of my body completely and instantly. We chatted for a few more minutes about fiancé and spousal visas, and then I was on my way.
The moment I was through the door (which lets you out into one of the worst Duty Free shops in North America) I pulled out my phone to video-call Leslie. After so many trips to see me, she is quite familiar with that shop. The moment the video connected she said to me: “You are in the Duty Free Store!” This was then followed by about twelve minutes of emotional blubbering from both of us. I was officially on my way to Dallas, Texas.
I write this from somewhere over the mid-west, from my very own private row near the front of the aircraft. There is an hour left before we land. I have no doubt that by the time we disembark the airplane, walk to the baggage carousel, and I retrieve my suitcase, it will be another 45 minutes. However that doesn’t matter… sometime in the next couple of hours, I will have my baby in my arms. We will kiss, we will cry, and then we will drive off together. That’s the part that counts… we will be together.
It has been far too long…
I finally fell asleep around 3:30am and slept about 4.5 hours. Yes, I am tired. I took care of my morning rituals, and then I packed my sundries into my suitcase. Yes, it was really weird waking up without Princess Sophie needing to go for a walk.
I mentioned in my middle-of-the-night post that I did not eat a second meal yesterday. I am not sure if that is why I was 2.2 lbs down on the scale this morning, or if it is the Taekwondo and golf, or if it is the weird sleep patterns of the last few nights. Whatever it is, I am taking it. This is my lowest recorded weight of the diet, just in time to go to Dallas.
I should clarify… I am not going off my diet in Dallas; I am going to eat different than I usually do, but still smart. I do not want to come home in a week to find out I have gained ten pounds. No, that is definitely not my intent. As well, Leslie will still be working while I am there, so I plan to do some walking. Yes, I know how hot it will be down there… I am not going to push myself, and I am going to take plenty of water with me when I go out during the day.
Speaking of water, Leslie reminded me that I cannot drink the tap water there. I am good with that… I know that we in Canada are spoiled, and even in California I filtered the tap water before drinking it. Bottled water will be big for me while I am there.
My son the elder is driving me to the airport today. He is coming by in a couple of hours, so we get to spend some time in the car together. I do love spending time with him, and if anyone wonders why I do not call him by name, it is because I do not want to embarrass him. We have a great relationship now, but it was not always so good. I understand he is sensitive, and I am careful to not press him. That is why there are very few pictures of him on my Facebook page. I did show Master Sasha a recent photo of him the other night though, and Sasha was blown away. My son is now older that Sasha was when he was teaching him Taekwondo. How things change!
I golfed with a couple of nice guys from China yesterday. None of us were great golfers, and we all had fun. After I duffed one shot, one of them pointed out that I might be having trouble because I wear two watches (I usually do not while playing golf… I have been a little out of sorts these last few days). I thanked him, but said I suspect it is because I am a lousy golfer who does not practice enough. That was the end of the discussion. This morning my left wrist is bothering me a little though. It is not hurting, but I certainly notice it is there. Note to self: Wear either the fitness watch or the nice watch when golfing… but never both of them.
As we prepared to tee off, I was chatting with the starter, and I told him that I was just happy that I was shooting in the low 90s again. He told me that 90% of golfers never break 100. I don’t know if that is true, or one of those out-of-the-air statistics… but it made me feel better for how badly I have been playing!
The local forecast for the day is hot and rainy, but I am wearing shorts. The average high/low temperatures in Dallas for the next week are 38°C/26.5°C… I am bringing a couple of pair of pants, but I expect to be wearing shorts almost every day of the trip. For those keeping score, yes… the average overnight low temperature in Dallas is higher than the average daytime high here. That is hot! Thank G-d for air conditioning, right?
Have a great day folks!
It is 1:00am Thursday morning, and I am too wired to sleep.
After two hours of Taekwondo on Tuesday, I golfed eighteen holes on Wednesday. I am definitely feeling it, but not in a bad way. That is not why I am not sleeping.
I only ate one proper meal Wednesday, a nice piece of salmon with roasted vegetables. In addition to that, I had a meal replacement in the morning, and some peanuts and some almonds in the afternoon. I spent most of the evening on the balcony alone smoking cigars. Why? Because Leslie is with her son, so she couldn’t talk… and I dropped Princess Sophie off with the dog sitter earlier in the evening. The apartment is very quiet and lonely without either of them.
I did my laundry and most of my packing… my sundries will go into the suitcase in the morning, and I will pack up my computer as well. Around 1pm my son the elder is coming to drive me to the airport, and then I will find out if everything is okay. I am crossing my fingers, even though I know everything will be fine.
I tried to check in for my flight, but American Airlines will not let you check in without proof of vaccination (which I have) being uploaded to their Verifly app… which does not seem to support my flight (or possibly my Canadian residence). I printed out the form, and will be at the airport very early… so that shouldn’t be an issue.
In the meantime, I am still too wired to sleep.
Yesterday morning I watched the video of my Black Belt test on Facebook Memories. It got me excited, reminding me of what I used to be able to do. I decided to do something about it. I reached out to one of the guys I used to train with – one of the guys I sparred with in that test. He now owns a Taekwondo school less than five kilometres from my apartment. We chatted for a couple of minutes, and it was decided. For the first time in two years (since pre-Covid, really), I attended my first Taekwondo classes. I participated first in the Senior Belt Class, and then in the Adults (All Levels) Class. It was amazing to get back into it. The instructor is a man who holds the same rank as I do, but who I remember teaching as a Colour Belt, so many years ago. I was introduced to both classes as an old friend, and it was wonderful to participate again.
After the class, I sat with Master Brunet and we discussed old times, and we discussed my situation with geography. He told me that as long as I was living in Burlington, I am welcome to attend and participate. He appreciated that I was able to take aside some of his students and show them how to improve upon their form. Every martial arts student has something to improve upon, and when an outside elder like myself (yes, it seems I am now an elder) points things out and does not just say ‘You are doing it wrong!’ but rather ‘Try this, and you will make it better!’ they can improve tremendously.
I see in my near future a few new articles on martial arts.
With the exception of peanuts, I was good yesterday. I also had a great workout in the evening. The result is I am down on the bathroom scale, which is where I want to be.
I have a tee time scheduled at a local golf course shortly. It is a course I have not played before… or maybe I played it once more than a decade ago with a colleague. I am not sure, but if it has been that long, it will be as if I have never played there. I am looking forward to my fourth round of golf of the year, and only hope that the weather holds. There is a 50% chance of rain and possible thunderstorms for a couple of hours. I am hoping that it bypasses us, but we’ll see. Either way, I am heading there now.
I have defrosted a piece of salmon for dinner this evening. I’ll steam some vegetables to go with it and should have a nice meal. Today will be the last full day of my diet for the next week, as I am flying to Dallas tomorrow to see my baby! I will still be mindful of my intake, and will continue writing every day to keep accountable.
Have a great day folks!
There are moments of anxiety mixed in with the excitement, knowing that in a couple of days I am flying to Dallas to be with my fiancée. The last time I tried to enter into the United States, I was denied entry. I do not think this will be a concern on Thursday, although I do suspect that I will be taken into the office for extended questioning. Fortunately, as my motives are pure and true, I am almost certain there will not be a problem.
Now if only I could tell that to my emotional brain, which has fleeting moments of real anxiety over it. The levels are not debilitating; it is more like how I felt before embarking on a mission in the Army. You planned for everything; you just need to get through it. Okay, at least with this, there is no chance of anyone dying.
I am back to eating peanuts, and I have to stop that. I think it is part of my anxiety, which means that in a couple of days, I’ll be off the peanuts
On my second screen, I am watching the video of my Black Belt test, twelve years ago this week. It is amazing that it has been so long. It is amazing to look back and see how many things I would correct… and to know how many things I would have to correct to get back to that form today. I need to get back into a dojang, but first I have to figure out where I am going to be.
I woke up really early today – 6am – and did my regular morning bathroom routine. I hardly slept five hours at that point… I had gone to bed at a reasonable hour but had trouble getting to sleep. Fortunately, when I got out of the bathroom, Princess Sophie was not gung-ho to go out, and I went back to sleep… for another three blissful hours! I cannot remember the last time I woke up at 10:00am when jetlag was not involved. Fortunately, I had nothing on my calendar for the morning, and all went fine.
Despite the earlier predictions of rain, the forecast for today and tomorrow is sunny and clear, so I might get a round of golf in tomorrow. Today I am going to relax around the house, maybe do some writing.
Have a great day folks!
I am not sure why I have been putting off writing this morning. I sat down at my computer over an hour ago, and it took me this long to get through my first sentences. Sigh.
Yesterday morning I took my boys for breakfast at the same place we usually go. I sent our favourite waitress an email letting her know we would be coming, but she replied that she had been fired for no reason. Boo. The waitress makes little difference to the quality of the food (which is always good) or the coffee (which is always terrible), but a good server can make a meal more enjoyable. The woman serving us yesterday did not do that. Oh well. I had my usual healthy breakfast, and we had a nice time together.
When we arrived at the restaurant, we were told there would be a 30–45-minute wait for a table, and that they would send me a text message when it was ready. We decided to walk across the street. The bookstore was closed, but the art supplies store was not. We walked around, and it turned out they sell STEM toys. My son the elder encouraged my son the younger to pick a couple out (as they were on a buy one, get 50% off the second sale), and while it was not his money to spend, I know that Gilad had never chosen a replacement STEM toy for the one that had not been delivered for his birthday. He was happy, and I never have an issue buying educational toys for my son.
I had a headache from the moment I woke up, so after breakfast I came home and took a nap. HRF Princess Sophie was only too happy to keep me company. After a couple of hours, we got up and I went shopping… despite saying that I was going to, I did not go to the supermarket Saturday, and now I was completely out of veggies. When I came home, I made my chicken for dinner, and then sat outside with a cigar.
I have a friend Josh who I have known for years, and a few years ago he and his wife invited me to celebrate Thanksgiving with them. Never one to turn down a turkey dinner, I was happy to bring a bottle of wine and cigars for after dinner. As we were smoking outside, he asked me: “Mitch, why is it that when I smoke any other cigar, I am left with a lousy taste in my mouth both that evening and the following morning… but when I smoke one of your cigars, I don’t get that?” The simple answer is that I only share very good cigars. Last night I smoked a cigar that was gifted to me by a friend, and let me tell you… I had to brush my teeth and gargle extra hard last night… and this morning. It was a very well-appointed cigar, with a double band that as embossed with the logo and fine print. The phrase ‘lipstick on a pig’ comes to mind. Still and all, when that friend asks me how it was, I will be nice about it.
I mentioned yesterday that the previous day I had a very unpleasant encounter with someone. That person had told an extremely offensive anti-Semitic joke about gassing Jews, and as a result I will not hang out with or around that person again. It turns out though that I had inadvertently hurt Ryan’s sister’s feelings, and I felt terrible about that. I sent her an apology this morning, and hope that she will forgive me. I cannot help though but to wonder if her level of offense (the day after the fact) might not be somehow tied to the fact that her boyfriend is an anti-Semite, and she might be trying to create an equality that ‘Well yes, he said something that offended you… but you said something that offended me too, so it’s all good.’ I made sure that my apology did not try to excuse my words as anything other than stupid comments… but still I wonder.
It is a beautiful day out, and I am looking forward to doing something I have not done in over a year. This afternoon I have a massage appointment booked, and I look forward to hopefully relieving some of the tension that is in my back and shoulders. I might take the opportunity to turn my mattress before I go, so that I will be sleeping on a fresh side. If I was smart, I would also go to buy new pillows… but knowing that in the next few months I will be moving in with Leslie, I do not want to rush to do that now. I am trying to keep my buying to a minimum… I already have too much stuff.
Have a great day folks, and enjoy the weather… wherever you are!
I lost my cool yesterday and wish I could go back in time to change that. I am honestly not sure though if I should have walked away or punched the guy. Folks, here’s a suggestion: Never tell a Jewish person a joke about Hitler not being a bad guy and the gassing of Jews was a misunderstanding. It is a sure way to get you on someone’s shit list. He will not get another chance with me.
I was at Ryan’s longer than I had expected so I ate with them… a large salad and some chicken tenders. I should have come home to eat, but that’s life. As for my weight this morning, depending on the measure it was either even with yesterday or down two pounds. I deleted those and stayed even. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.
I am taking my sons for breakfast shortly, which means that most of my morning coffee will be lousy. That’s life. When I come home (and they go home) I will brew a fresh pot to enjoy. The weather forecast is grim until 4pm, at which point it dries up a little. Tomorrow is the only sunny day on the forecast until I fly to Dallas, so I will try to golf.
I miss my Leslie. I know she misses me. We are down to the short strokes now, but there are still four days until my love is in my arms.
Have a great day folks!
