Losing a part of me

Category: Walking

  • 2026 Day 4

    Over the past month I have not really trusted my bathroom scale. I have had a lot of inconsistent readings, and have often had to adjust it on the floor to get it to register at all. As such, the fact that this morning my weight is eleven pounds down from what it was Thursday morning (Day 1) is dubious. I also recognize that as my weight drops the scale will be more accurate and consistent and trustworthy. Am I excited that the number is eleven pounds down? No. Am I encouraged knowing that I have been doing pretty well, and that however accurate or inaccurate the scale may be, I weigh less than I did four days ago? Yes.

    As I discussed in my article yesterday, I did end up buying celery. That will be a good snack for times that I get hungry between meal replacements. Owing to the fact that I (stupidly) went to the store three hours after my previous meal replacement, I also bought peanuts. I made the conscious decision to leave them in the car, which means that I will not sit around the house eating them. They are there, I will snack on them when I drive, but really they are a break-glass option. Peanuts (unsalted) are very healthy, and while I am not going to try to justify them as an acceptable addition to my program, I know that when I am weak and tempted (as I was Friday evening) they are a better alternative than a lot of other options out there. I also know that after the supermarket closes there are a lot of snacks that I could buy at a convenience store… none of which are nearly as good choices as unsalted peanuts. If I am going to cheat, let it be a minor cheat and not a ‘off the wagon’ cheat.

    I have never figured out (nor done any type of research on) how my fitness watch measures and rates my sleep. I do know that it is usually (not always) pretty accurate. For example, if I think I slept really well one night, but the watch give me a low score and says ‘non-restorative’ then I will doubt its veracity… until I realize by mid-morning that I am ready for a nap. When I woke up this morning I checked my score: 80 (Good). The details:

    • Duration: 7h43m (Excellent)
    • Stress: 22 avg (Fair)
    • Deep: 1h51m (Excellent)
    • Light: 4h35m (Good)
    • REM: 1h17m (Good)
    • Awake/Restlessness: 33m, 34 Restless Moments (Fair)

    While I felt like it must have been 6:00am, it was actually about 12:40am when Her Floofness jumped down off the bed. When she does this in the middle of the night, unless she is sick it means that she is thirsty. Owing to the noise coming from my server farm in the office, I keep the bedroom door closed at night, so I knew I had to get up to let her out. I would have had to get up to bring her back onto the bed anyways, so your suggestion that I bring her water dish into the bedroom would have changed nothing. I took the opportunity to use the washroom (remember I am drinking a lot more water), then brought the Floof back up, and then got back into bed. I lay awake for the next 25 minutes wondering if I would ever get back to sleep. Obviously I did… and I know it was 25 minutes because that’s what my watch tells me it was. I do not know sow it all gets measured, but with a sleep score of 80, I suspect that I will not feel like I need a nap today.

    I do not know if it was because I had peanuts and celery, but I do not think I had my fourth meal replacement yesterday… again. As today is going to be a quiet and lazy day, I do not think that is the worst thing in the world. I suspect that starting tomorrow, when I will be teaching from 10am to 9:00pm, I will definitely need every calorie I am allowed on the program. Before you ask, I did not know how many I had, but I know I did not eat nearly as many peanuts yesterday as I had the previous day. That is a bad habit – I should be measuring my food intake and I should be aware of everything that I eat – that I will try to break… but I have tried many times before with no success.

    I do not think I have anywhere I need to drive to today. I plan to stay close to home for a few reasons. The first reason is that I do not feel like seeing people if I do not have to. I also know that the peanuts are in the car. With all of that, I also have a Check Engine light going on my dashboard, and I have a note on my calendar to call the mechanic tomorrow morning. Until I get it checked, I do not plan to drive anywhere that I do not need to drive to. Hopefully the mechanic will be able to look at it Wednesday morning (by the time I speak with him tomorrow, it will be too late… and Tuesday morning I have to take Her Floofness to the spa for her grooming appointment). I do not expect it is anything too serious… but it is better to be safe than sorry. Also… peanuts.

    I did drink at least my two litres of water yesterday, and am already halfway through my first litre of the day for today. I was thinking that I got a late start to the day, but really I did not – according to the fitness watch, I was out of bed at 7:46am – so I really am on track for most of my day. I suppose my shake was later than it could have been. We came in from our walk around 9:30am, which means that I did not make my shake until 9:45am… much later than I would on a work day. I remember in previous attempts at this program, I would space my shakes out at four hours apart – 8am – 12pm – 4pm – 8pm. That may be a good plan for the week, but for today I would either have to condense that, or bring it down to three meal replacements. We will see how I am feeling.

    I am hoping that over the next few days I will see how adding celery to my program affects me. I cannot imagine there would be any negative effects, but I wonder if eating two or three stalks per day might make me feel less hungry, or if I might not even feel the need for the fourth meal replacement. This week will be an experiment.

    On the same topic, I did something I do not think I have ever done before. When I brought the celery home, I immediately washed it, and then cut the stalks into thirds, placing them in a sealed container in the fridge. I hope that will keep it crispy. We will see, but if that works, then I will continue that regimen when buying celery.

    When I saw my doctor on November 27th I made her three promises. The first was that by the time I see her again on February 1st I will have lost 10kg. The second was that I would check my blood pressure at the pharmacy at least once per week. The third promise was that I would start doing some light exercise. It took me a month to get to where I am (with a number of false starts and ups and downs), but I am about halfway to the 10kg promise. As for my blood pressure? No, I have not measured it once. I have to remember to do that the next time I am there, but I keep forgetting. I will try to go this week, but even if I do not, I have another medical appointment next Monday and I know he will take my bp… and I suspect he will do blood work as well. If he does not, then I know that my doctor will order blood work on the 1st. As for the exercise? That one has also been a fail.

    The sun is shining, and it is a lovely day outside. Unfortunately, the wind is blowing pretty hard, so while the temperature is hovering around 0°, according to the weather report the wind chill is -11°. Even when it is hot outside, sitting out with a cigar when it is really windy is not comfortable. I will see if it dies down throughout the day, but if it does not then I will be inside for the duration. Yes, I took Her Floofness for a good walk this morning, and we will go out again in the evening… but if it is too windy then other than that we will be hibernating.

    Seeing as I will be inside all day, I might take the opportunity to dust off the treadmill and start making good on that third promise I made to the doctor. I do not think I am ready to jog, but what is to say that I cannot walk 5km? It is time I get off my duff and start trying to get back into shape. We’ll see… but I think that is a good plan for the afternoon. I am going to wait until my neighbour gets home from Costco… Princess Sophie will be happy to go over there for a visit!

    Speaking of things I should be doing… I might try to take a certification exam this afternoon for a class that I have been putting off. That is a good idea!

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1292

    30.4. The bathroom scale this morning confirmed that it took me twenty-six days to drop 30.4 lbs., and I nearly wooted out loud. I suspect it would have scared Her Floofness so early in the morning, but I quietly smiled.

    Yesterday was the second day in a row that I moved my bowels twice. I suppose the fibre is finally doing its job! Aside from dropping another half pound, I was also happy to see my sleep score of 84 this morning. Even though I wish I could have slept another 30-60 minutes, and my fitness watch categorized it as: ‘shorter than ideal, plenty of deep.’ That means that four of the last seven nights I had a sleep score of seventy-five or better. I think it is a combination of the melatonin and going to bed a little earlier that is helping. Of course, that ends Wednesday… I am teaching another class in Europe Wednesday through Friday, which means my sleep cycle will be completely upside down again. To make things even more interesting (sic), I should be receiving confirmation today or tomorrow that I am also teaching a class in Europe the next two weeks straight. Financially that is a relief. Sleep wise? Not so much.

    The class I should be teaching the next two weeks is for a certification that I do not currently hold, so I am preparing to sit the exam Wednesday… although I will be deciding sometime today whether or not to move that up to tomorrow… or even this evening. We’ll see. It is another high-level cybersecurity exam, and while it is slightly different from the CISSP, it is not significantly different. Going through a lot of the material I realized that there is a huge overlap in material, which is why I am thinking of moving it up. Practically speaking, that also would give me more time to reschedule it for the weekend if I do happen to fail… which is unlikely, but always a possibility.

    Yesterday I drove out to see my son around 11:00am, and then after about an hour with him I drove to Hagersville for my cigars, just as I had planned. I also take the opportunity when I am out there to fill my gas tank – the difference is at least twenty cents per litre!

    I kept telling myself that I needed to stop off for milk and cheese before I went home, and then I got distracted. The next time I thought of it I had already parked the car. Rather than hop back in, I went into the house, greeted Her Floofness, and took out the garbage before I headed out. I grabbed a reusable bag and walked to the supermarket on the corner. I was surprised that even with that walk I had not hit my steps goal for the day. As low as the goal is, I figured that would have done it. Luckily, despite several earlier outings, Princess Sophie told me she wanted to go out after I came in from my evening cigar, at which point not only did she poop, but I was also able to achieve my daily steps goal. I am hoping that yesterday was Day 1 of a new steps-goal streak. I know that with my crazy work schedule it might be a bit challenging, but let’s see if I can do it.

    Okay, I have rescheduled my exam for tomorrow afternoon. Now I have a bit more prep to do before I am ready. I also have some videos to record today for a contract I have been working on. It should be a fun if harried couple of days.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1271

    I do not remember at what point I stopped updating my offline journal – that is, the one large document that included all of the posts from my online blog – but it occurs to me that I should seriously think about going back and updating it. I do not really want to see a lot of the worst of my entries from the deepest times of despair, but I suppose I can just copy-and-paste without reading them. We will see. That will not happen before Thursday – today is my last complete day to study for my exam which is at 1:00pm tomorrow afternoon, so my main focus until after the exam will be that. Wednesday I will be at a provincial Grand Lodge event, which takes us to Thursday.

    I should mention that I did resume updating my weight tracking spreadsheet from my bathroom scale. That is much easier to do, and does not involve going to each individual day to cop-paste. All I needed to do was to expert all data from the scale since the beginning of April and then copy-paste that into my spreadsheet.

    The new shirts and jacket that I ordered are out for delivery according to FedEx, and I will have them in time for my event on Wednesday. That is a relief. While I do have a suit that I can wear, it is tight and I will feel more comfortable wearing something that is tailored to my size. The disturbing truth is that from the day the tailor measured me for these new clothes I gained over ten pounds… that is just over a month ago. Fortunately I have these last five days lost all of that. Phew! As terrible as I feel that I needed to have bigger clothes made, that would have been amplified had they now been tight.

    Yes, today is Day 5, and according to the bathroom scale I have dropped a little over ten pounds. I am pleased but far from satisfied. I have a long way to go, as I said yesterday, until I am anywhere near satisfied. Maybe ‘satisfied with my progress so far’ is a better way to write that.

    I need to start exercising in order to make sure I continue to not only lose weight, but also to ensure I get back into shape. My doctor will tell you that I am in great shape for a man a fucking overweight as I am (she would not use those exact words), but that is not good enough for me. I would like to run a marathon next year. Before I do that, I need to start walking again before I can start jogging again. I am going to wait a couple of weeks before jogging for a number of reasons, but as for walking I might start as early as Thursday, depending on the weather. Yes, I have a treadmill… but if the weather is nice I would much rather begin my journey again in the fresh air.

    My sleep score last night was equal to the previous night. I suspect that if I was not drinking what amounts to a small swimming pool every day it might be a bit higher… but alas, I am going to continue to drink as much water as I can. Water is great for the body, but it is also a big contributor to weight loss… even if it did not help to fill my occasionally hungry stomach. I only woke up three times to pee in the night last night which is a 25% improvement over the two previous nights.

    I did finally move my bowels yesterday which was a relief (no pun intended). I neglected to add fibre to my morning meal replacement, but will make a point of doing so this afternoon.

    Owing to something I needed to get done for a buddy yesterday, I was not as productive as I would have liked to be. I did get some studying done… but not as much as I hoped to. Today there will be no disturbances, and that is what I am going to do.

    There are so many things I probably should do with regard to tracking my renewed weight loss efforts, but I am not ready to do that yet. I know that my Body Mass Index (BMI) is a disgusting 42.6, up twelve points from my best ever in October 2023. I have to assume that means that I would again be classified as morbidly obese, but looking to see at what point I would drop out of that… I am not ready for that. I know that I need to set short, medium, and long-term goals for myself, but for the time being I just want to follow the program like an automaton. I will drink my meal replacements and do nothing more other than journal about my emotions.

    The friend who came over yesterday is one of two who has gone through the same medically supervised program that I did. He understands a lot of what I am going through. He and his wife went through it and they lost a lot of weight. It is good to have people that I can speak with who have been there.

    My only plans to go out today are to go to the store to pick up milk for my coffee. Other than that, I expect I will migrate between my desk and my balcony, studying either inside or outside. I will continue to try stabilizing the timing of my meal replacements, which might be easier today at home than tomorrow (when I have my exam) and Wednesday (when I will likely be in Toronto for the day). Speaking of which, I had better remember to bring my meal replacements with me if I go to Toronto… I do not want to be caught having to break the program as I am still trying to make it a habit… and while I am doing so well.

    While I have felt hunger at times, I suspect that yesterday was the first day that I did not consider the program (which is by any measure extreme) a hardship. I was able to get through it without a great deal of difficulty. There have been times these last few days when cigars have helped to distract me from my hunger, and I will continue to use them as a tool. I was going to use the word crutch but no, it is not a crutch. I am not leaning on them, rather I am using them to bridge the hunger meal replacements, much as a snack might bridge the hunger between meals.

    I have said before that forcing a happy face when one is down can be a way to actually induce the happiness eventually. I am trying to put on that positive and happy air these days, and I hope that after tomorrow’s exam I might start to feel it. Until then? The exam and its implications are all consuming.

    Have a great day folks.

  • Day 1174

    Holy crap it is cold out there. Yesterday afternoon I joked with someone that if there was any more inclement weather this season it would be my fault because I had my winter tyres switched out for the summer tyres Monday morning. we laughed ironically in the way we would when we blame someone who had their car washed for the rain. We probably should have checked the forecast before laughing.

    As I lay in bed trying to fall asleep last night I could not help but notice the howling winds outside. It sounded like we might see the Wicked Witch of the West searching for her sister’s feet under neighbourhood houses this morning. I figured at least the storm was blowing through in the night, and should be passed in the morning. No such luck.

    As I dressed to take Her Floofness out this morning, I checked the weather as I always do. The temperature was a brisk (sic!) -6°, but with the high winds (with gusts up to 50km/h) the windchill would make it feel like -17°. Just to clarify, we are in the second week of April, and no, this is not normal. Our walk was not as long as it usually would be on a clear spring morning.

    After a disastrous night the previous night, I did take a couple of naps yesterday and was able to make it through my class. When I laid my head down on my pillow last night, I had plenty on my mind… and none of it was good. I did not expect much, but when I woke up this morning I could not remember waking up in the night. My sleep score was 87, and while I only slept 7 hours it was quite restorative. I am now eager to attack today with gusto!

    What do I have going on today? I have to pack my car and drive to the other side of Toronto to check into my hotel. I will pick up my dry cleaning on the way, but until 6:30pm (when I am meeting a friend for dinner) I have nothing to rush. I do have some work that I would like to get done, so I might do that before hitting the road. We will see.

    The week before last I was a bit off my game, and the instructor evaluations for the class I taught reflected that. I knew going into last week’s class that I needed to redeem myself, and I think I did. This morning I was able to review my evals for last week’s class and not only did the numbers reflect my success, but some of the student comments absolutely made my morning. A couple that stood out:

    “(Mitch) has been an amazing instructor and i will remember these past 5 days due to how engaging he has been. I took this course a few years back and i can hands down say he is my favorite teacher! 100 stars if i could”

    “Mitch is a seasoned instructor with excellent delivery of information. He is able to provide examples and definitions. He has character and charisma. Mitch is probably the best instructor that I’ve had to date, he keeps me captivated and engaged, he’s able to take something boring and make it interesting. He both asks and answers questions from students, he is very dedicated to the subject which he teaches and has a delivery of the subject that is better than any instructor that I’ve had in my life.”

    “Thank you for the great examples you gave in class. When I took a practice test for Security+, I remember them, and they helped me to answer the questions more easily. Your way of teaching really helped me understand the material better.”

    “Mitch needs a raise”

    These were, it should be mentioned, from four different students. Even so, not everyone was 100% satisfied… I just don’t know why not because he or she did not leave a comment. Oh well.

    The sun is shining bright through my window and I have to remember that were I to step outside I would be blown away and frozen solid. Okay that is an exaggeration, but it is cold and not exactly ‘walking outside comfortably’ weather. I hope the wind will abate by this evening so I might be able to enjoy a cigar outside my hotel… if not? it will not be the end of the world.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1154

    I did better yesterday than I had the previous day, but I still have work to do before I am in top form on my program. My weight, which was up a pound yesterday, is now down two pounds this morning. I am reminded that it is not the points on the graph, but rather the trend that matters. With that said, I have to keep the trend going or else it is a huge failure.

    The meal replacements that I ordered Monday are due to arrive today, and I am stocked up to hit the ground running upon my return from Montreal Tuesday afternoon. While I am still planning to work at it until I leave, I know that on my trip (Saturday through Tuesday) I will be a giant ball of anxiety and stress, and expecting to stay true to the program is not reasonable. I set that expectation before I posted my ‘No Groceries’ calendar on the inside of my door. While I am not going to go crazy with eating and snacking, I am also not going to try to consume only meal replacements. Yes, I will take some with me. No, I am not planning on sticking to the program. That will begin in earnest Wednesday.

    Spring is in the air, and my walk with Her Floofness this morning was quite pleasant. That being said, every year Canadians experience their first warm days in March and are then shocked to find out that we are not quite done with winter weather until mid-April. With today’s forecast high temperatures of 18°, some may think that it is time to store their coats in the cellar and to change out their winter tyres. They do not notice that tomorrow’s forecast low is the freezing point, and by Saturday and Sunday that drops further to -6°. The forecast for Montreal for the duration of my stay predicts a maximum high of 7° and a low of -9°. I am not even making the appointment to change my tyres until that is in my rearview mirror.

    With all that, it was still nice to walk through the park this morning unmolested by ice and snow and slush. What were extremely hazardous walking paths a few short days ago are now mostly dry with the occasional puddle or wet patch. It is a relief to not worry about injuring oneself due to slipping and falling as a price for walking my dog through the park. While I am sad that I will be stuck behind my computer for most of the day and evening, I do plan to spend my lunch break on the balcony… and that door will be open to allow Princess Sophie to sit out and bask in the sun as she watches over her subjects walking through her realm.

    My weight is still way too far above the terrible mark, but I have a plan. That is important. My first short-term goals are to drop below that permanently, and to hopefully drop below 290 lbs. by April 11th – the night of my Lodge’s banquet.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1067

    This morning’s weigh-in brought me back below the terrible mark once more… if only barely. I am hoping that my knee heals up soon so that I can get back onto the treadmill. I have not been anywhere close to hitting my steps-goal since breaking the streak on Monday, and my fitness watch has now adjusted my goal to 7,240 steps.

    One thing is for sure… there is no way Princess Sophie and I are going to spend a lot of time outside today… the mercury read -15°C (5°F) when we went out for a very brief walk this morning, and despite the sunshine, the forecast high is still only -9°. We literally got to the end of the building when she signaled to me that the snow was painful on her little paws, so I picked her up and brought her back into the house. While she was not a fan the last time we tried them, I am buying a set of dog booties to try again. We won’t have too many days this cold, but still…

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1056

    I did pretty well yesterday, not cheating at all. I had my regular breakfast, then a buddy from the Lodge came over for a cup of coffee. When he left I hit the treadmill, and while I did complete five kilometres, I only jogged the first three of them, slowing my pace for the last two clicks to a brisk walk.

    After I got off the treadmill and showered I had a meal replacement shake, and then I took Her Floofness out for her walk. I was about 2,000 steps shy of my steps goal for the day, and a good walk with her would finish that off. The flaw in that plan was that it was raining, and Princess Sophie does not enjoy walking in the rain. Yes, she did her business… but I was not able to coax her more than a hundred feet from the door we walked out of. The neighbour who lives right there came home as I was ‘arguing’ with the pup, and welcomed us to come into the building through her apartment (rather than having to walk all the way to the front of the building in the rain). Okay, that issue was solved… but I was still short nearly 1,500 steps! Solution: I got back onto the treadmill for a short walk. It was not strenuous exercise, I was not pushing myself, and while I did get a little warm, I did not break a sweat. With a steps-goal of 11,010, I went to bed with 11,092 steps on the tracker. That increased today’s goal to… 11,030. Don’t hold me to it, but I think I might be able to make it.

    I have to go shopping today… and not for the usual provisions. I decided a couple of months ago that I was going to make homemade doggie treats for Chanukah, and I bought the cookie cutter shapes back in September. As I am planning on driving down to the USA later this week to mail some things to my wife, I am going to make them today so that I can ship some to her for Duchess. We also agreed that while Duchess and Sophie would devour them, I found a recipe without peanut butter so that I could give some to Charlie (our next door neighdog) as well. He is the only dog I have ever met who does not eat peanut butter. There’s always one weirdo in the group, right?

    Knowing that I have very little planned for today, I will probably extend my treadmill workout to six kilometres. I want to make sure I extend my streak (currently at 11 days), but I do not want to overdo it and find out that tomorrow’s steps goal would be 12,500. I am thinking strategically to give myself the best chance to beat my current streak record of sixteen days. For the record, this streak is only accounting for the time since I switched from Fitbit to Garmin, so probably five years now.

    I fell asleep without much trouble last night… and then at 3:15am I woke up and could not get back to it. I finally picked up my phone and spent an hour watching TikTok and doing whatever else until my eyes were exhausted, and I dozed off again. My sleep score was 70, which considering the hour-long interruption is not too bad. My body battery was up to 79… also pretty good. My weight was down nearly two pounds from yesterday and is now the lowest it has been in a week; it is still 2 lbs. higher than my best weight eight days ago, but that is what falling off the wagon will do. Fortunately, I am mostly back on the wagon. I will probably eat today… but I will do so smartly (both with regard to portion and choices.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1051

    The 5.5km treadmill workout I did yesterday put me over the top. I have officially completed the MapMyFitness.com ‘You vs. the Year 2024’ challenge. I am in the top 12.16% of participants (186,000 participants). Completing the challenge does not mean I am going to slow down. I am hoping to continue to make progress with my working out and losing weight for the rest of the year, and well into 2025.

    I cheated slightly yesterday but not terribly. I met some of my Lodge brothers at the pub before the official meeting, and I had to order something. I ordered the least cheating (while still within my religious dietary requirements) thing on the Happy Hour menu. Thinking about it, I could have ordered the six-piece chicken wings… but I know that wings are my Achilles heel, and I did not want to risk falling off the wagon because I had to order something.

    My weight did drop slightly this morning, but I would have preferred to see a more substantial drop after yesterday’s tremendous gain. No dice. I will continue to try to do as well as I can so that I can hopefully get back to where I was Wednesday. We’ll see. My sleep score was an amazing 89, and my body battery was up to 83 this morning. While my Body Battery was better yesterday, my sleep score had not been that high in nearly four weeks. I am glad that I got a good night sleep and will try to benefit from the body battery by hitting the treadmill for another good workout later today.

    I was put on the unpopular side of a discussion at our Lodge meeting last night and I felt bad that I was the only opposing voice. I realize that I was the one nay vote, but I am uncomfortable to have been placed in that position. I am going to try to discuss it with the Lodge’s leadership so that it does not happen again. If it is going to happen then I will have to walk away from the Lodge. I am in a very bad headspace over this.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1048

    I passed my exam yesterday! I was nervous… it was a grueling exam, and I was reasonably certain as I left the examination room that I had failed. When I got to the reception area and the woman at the desk handed me the paper with my results, she handed it to me upside down. I turned it over to see a single word… if the first word says ‘Congratulations’ then it was a pass. I was thrilled about it! Now I have to go through the entire process of getting endorsed so that I can pay my annual dues and advertise the certification. Yes, it is a bit of a pain compared to a lot of the previous certifications that I have earned (pass exam = certification) … but that’s what happens when you move up into the big leagues I suppose!

    With all of the pre-exam cramming and post-exam relief, it was late in the afternoon before I had a meal replacement. I then had a cigar with my wife (video chat is hard, but at least we were able to connect) and then decided to get onto the treadmill for a 5km walk. Following that, I showered and then decided to make myself eggs instead of another meal replacement. As I mentioned to Leslie yesterday, the only thing wrong with that is my cholesterol; she responded (tongue-in-cheek) that this week cholesterol may be bad, but we’ll see what it is next week. Yes, the medical community does seem to change their opinions from time to time.

    My sleep score was only 76, but I still felt pretty good when I woke up… probably because when I woke up at 4:00am thinking I was awake for the day, I was able to fall back asleep until 7:15. I am still waking up with a headache… after four nights of the same I have to think that the added element to my sleep regimen, which certainly does help me to fall asleep, is the cause. I will experiment with dosages and brands to see if I can both get to sleep and wake up without the headache.

    The bathroom scale this morning has me down 1.6 lbs. from yesterday, which means that after one week on the program I am down just over ten pounds. Yay! I will try to keep on the downward trend for the entire month of December… how wonderful would it be to lose another 15-20 lbs. before New Years Day?

    I am off to see a buddy this afternoon. I will do my best to stay true to my program so that I can continue to lose weight. When I come home, I will get onto the treadmill. I will do my best. The only cheating I plan to do this month is with turkey dinners that I am invited to. Other than that… I will stay true.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1047

    Yesterday I did pretty well on the program… until the evening. It is amazing how badly emotional pain can affect me. I cheated… but not badly. My eating yesterday consisted of:

    • Breakfast omelette
    • Two meal replacement shakes
    • One protein bar
    • Two poached eggs at night.

    Believe me, I wanted to cheat much worse than two poached eggs… but I did not.

    I also managed 5km on the treadmill, and for the second day in a row I hit the steps-goal on my fitness watch. Yesterday’s goal was 9,930, and I took just short of 11,000 steps. Today’s steps-goal is 10,130. I will do my best to get onto the treadmill and hit that goal, but frankly my exam is this afternoon, and that is my number one priority. If I can get some studying in and then hit the treadmill, then I will be thrilled. If not, then I will try to get onto the treadmill after the exam. That, however, might be tight because of a few other things I have going on today.

    There is a site called MapMyFitness.com which I have mentioned a couple of times over the past couple of years. I do not think I have mentioned it this year, but last year they had a challenge to walk/run 1023km in 2023. This year they extended that challenge to 1024km in 2024. This is not about the number of steps we take throughout the day, rather only in actual registered workouts. I hit the ground running early in the year, but then fell off a few times. I have start-stopped my walking so many times that it is hard to keep track of. Of course, on days when I do not do an actual workout, I often register my walks with Princess Sophie for the challenge, so even with nothing else, considering the average distance I walk with the doggo per day is 3km, without any other workouts I should still surpass 1024km handily by mid-December. However, since I do not always register our walks together, and since I spent a lot of time out of town (whether in Cuba or Dallas), I have not walked her about ten weeks this year. Yes, I do a lot of walking when I am in Cuba… but I do not register walking around as exercising. Anyways, I am happy that with yesterday’s treadmill walk I surpassed 1000km on the year, and I am now a scant 18km from reaching the goal. I thought there was a prize drawing for all of the people who completed the challenge, but sometime in the last few months it seems the site was sold by Under Armour to a company called Outside, and they do not seem to be offering any prizes other than the online badge. I am okay with that, since only 2-3 participants who finished the challenge would have been chosen at random for a prize package, and I have a better chance of getting hit by space debris than winning (186,000 participants, and I am in the top 12.51%, which means that a little over 23,200 people have either completed or are within 18km of completing the goal. I’m good with the online badge!

    My sleep score was only 79 last night, but I felt much better rested than I usually do in the morning. That might have something to do with my having gotten up at 4:15am to pee and thinking as I lay there that I might as well get out of bed because I was not falling back a…. and then I was out again. My body battery only got up to a 56, and I really have no idea how to improve on that… other than losing all of the weight that I want to lose, and then figuring out how to get a good night’s sleep.

    My weight dropped for the third day in a row, but only by half a pound. While I would love much bigger losses, I have to understand that going forward I will need to be happy with a 3-4 pound drop per week, and will not be experiencing those huge per-day losses as I did at the outset. I just don’t have that much excess weight to lose that would account for a 10 lbs. drop week after week. If I can lose 3.5 lbs. per week for the next ten weeks then I will still not be at my best weight ever… but I will fit comfortably into all of my custom tailored clothes… except for what might be too large on me.

    I was speaking with my diet buddy yesterday and recognized a pattern in her that I brought up, and we had a good chat about it. Every time she talks about her progress or slipping, she spends fifteen minutes talking about how other people look and what they do and how they must look at her… and at the end she says, ‘and of course I am disappointed with myself.’ I told her that it seems that she equates her own value to how others are or how they look, but because everyone tells her that weight loss should be for ourselves she ends it with ‘oh and me.’ It is like someone going on and on about what is wrong with Jews, and then saying, ‘but of course I don’t have anything against Jews.’ It is obvious they do, but they know it is wrong, so they say that. I asked her if she has ever spoken to a professional about her weight issues. It seems to me that she will never be satisfied with her weight until she is happy with who she is as a person. I think I gave her a lot to think about, and she told me that she is going to try to find a therapist for that. I am always happy when I can help her… or anyone else for that matter.

    …now if I could only get my own head in a good place, life would be grand.

    Have a great day folks!