Losing a part of me

Category: Cigars

  • Distractions

    I enjoyed my meal-replacement soup exactly on schedule, and then picked a fine cigar to enjoy on the balcony… and after that, another. I was supposed to have a meeting at 5:30, but he canceled early, so I was able to finish that second cigar without rushing it. I came back into the house, took care of a couple of things, and then I realized that I was a bit hungry… not terribly, but I was ready for my next meal replacement. It was only once I made that decision that I realized that I was an hour late for it.

    While it is important to spread my nutrition out throughout the day, I was pleased to see that while I was enjoying my cigars I was not thinking about food. That is something important to remember – like so many other things, hunger (and eating) is sometimes more about what is in my head than what is in my stomach. How often have I eaten because I was bored, rather than actually hungry?

    There is an old saying that idle hands are the devil’s playground. I will have to remember that an idle mind is a glutton’s nightmare. The idle hands thing might play into it too… after all, throughout the time I was outside, I had a cigar in one hand and my phone in the other. Keeping just might be an important part of my weight management strategy… both while I am losing the weight, and when it comes time to maintaining it.

  • Memories Of A Friend

    A couple of weeks ago I got a reminder from Princess Sophie’s vet in California that she was due for some of her vaccines. After confirming the name with my son (the elder), I made an appointment for her with the vet that my family has used since before I met them. At 11:15 my girl was sitting happily in the passenger seat of my car, and we headed out there. We were only a few blocks away when I realized the reality of the last time I had been there.

    It was May of 2016 when Jacob-Pup went in. He was in pain, having suffered from a degenerative illness that essentially fused his spine. I had a difficult decision to make – either pay for a $12,000 surgery which had a less-than-50% success rate, or say goodbye. I held my best friend in my arms as the pain (and his life) drained out of his eyes. He was so brave, and even then he was trying to comfort me, reassuring me that I had made the right decision.

    It is nearly six years later, and as we approached the clinic I started to weep, just thinking about it.

    There are not many positives to the restrictions that the Covid pandemic have forced upon us, but had I been able to walk through the front doors of the clinic I might have lost it. As it was, handing Princess Sophie off the the technician at the door, then sitting in my car in front was not easy.

    The doctor called and we had our quasi-tele-vet appointment. As she kvelled about how wonderful my little girl is (beauty, temperament, and health), I was proud… but holding back tears, remembering the last conversation I had with her.

    While I never needed an excuse, I have always been an emotional eater. As we drove down Trafalgar toward the highway, I tried to avert my eyes. There is a pub along the road that makes among my favourite buffalo wings in the city, and how easy would it have been to stop in to pick up a pound or two? Who would have blamed me if reliving the death of my best buddy was the impetus for a cheat meal? I doubt it would have been one meal. It would have been the first step at jumping off a very dangerous slope, and I could not do that to myself. As Leslie said this morning, hate the diet, love the results. It would have been so easy, and so easily explained, had I just fallen off right there… but there are 365 days in a year, and if you live long enough, every day is another memory of something that would be another great excuse to fall off the plan.

    I drove right past the pub, speaking with Leslie for much of the drive. She is a great support when I need it. I had an errand to run (which involved walking through a supermarket full of tempting food), and then we were home… and I had not veered from the program. I did not even, as I said I might, go straight for my meal replacement, a little earlier than normal. I put my things away and sat down to write.

    After I press Send I will have that meal replacement, and then I will sit on the balcony with a cigar. Princess Sophie might join me, and if she does, we will honour the memory of my Jacob Doggie, taken from me way too soon.

  • Day 14

    I almost made it through yesterday, but between two meal replacements I needed energy to continue my class, and I took fifteen almonds. That was my only cheat on the day. I was also happy with my water intake throughout the day. I will try to continue that.

    In my previous journal I mentioned how I am having an easier time walking than I had two weeks before, and I am definitely experiencing that now. Princess Sophie and I did not go for a long walk this morning, but I am definitely having an easier time of it. That is a huge improvement. I am probably ten kilos lighter than I was two weeks ago, and that is a lot of weight to be rid of. It is not enough… but it is certainly a good amount for two weeks. I wish I thought I could maintain this pace, but that is not possible. The initial weight loss can be massive, but then it slows. By the end of the first month, I should be happy to lose five pounds per week.

    Speaking of which, tomorrow is my weigh-in day. Knowing that I cannot trust the numbers on the scale (I will register them, but I will not put too much trust in them), I am going to focus on measurements. On Day 1 I measured my chest, my belly, and under my belly. Tomorrow morning, I will measure those three again, and I will register my satisfaction with my progress based on that.

    I ate the last of the chocolate bars yesterday, and I opened the last box of the apple cinnamon bars. I have been going back and forth in my mind about whether to order more or not. I have discussed it with Leslie, who is more than happy to receive them and then cross-ship them, saving at least some of the import charges that a business shipping across the border would have to pay.

    My biggest concern was should I, upon completion of my stock of American product, simply make the clean transition to the Canadian program (and its 900 calories in four products, over the American 800 calories in five products), or do I want to cross-pollenate the two programs, possibly having three (Canadian) shakes, and either one or two (American) bars. That would bring my daily intake to either 835 calories, or 995 calories. Neither one of these totals would necessarily slow my weight loss. My current thinking is that whenever I crave solid foods (of which the Canadian program is devoid) I can reach for a meal replacement bar. The two that I have been having every day have made my transition to the program a lot less of a shock than it might otherwise have been.

    In the end, I decided to order a six-week supply of both the chocolate and the apple cinnamon. While it feels like a shock to the pocketbook to pay it all up front, having the product will make it easier for me to lose weight, and that is the goal. Additionally, before we factor in the cost of shipping them to Canada, the American product (per serving) is about $0.70 cheaper than the Canadian. As you also do not have to go through the hassle of getting a doctor’s prescription from an affiliated clinic, it is also much more convenient.

    Although I have ordered the products, I will not have them before I eat my last apple cinnamon bar. There will be at least a week when I am on shakes and soups only, a completely liquid diet. I suspect that there will be some almonds in there as needed.

    When I was on the program in California, I did well for a while on a hybrid program for a while. I don’t remember when I started it, but instead of having the five meal replacements per day, I would have either three or four meal replacements, a piece of chicken (quarter dark), and a salad (with a little oil and balsamic vinegar). I would have to comb through the 200 pages of writing more thoroughly than I did to figure out when I started, and how well I did on that plan. I tried for about fifteen minutes and did not find it. I do know that as tempting as the idea sounds to me, I am going to wait… a while still. Maybe when I am completely out of the soups I can consider it, but I still have a few weeks’ worth of soup before that happens. With that said, I did a few calculations… two Canadian shakes (450 calories), plus one American bar (160 calories), one chicken leg quarter (330 calories), plus one salad of lettuce, onion, cucumber, tomatoes with a dash of oil and balsamic vinegar (160 calories). That would be an 1,100-calorie day, which is not the worst thing in the world. In fact, I am reasonably sure that when I discuss this with my doctor, he will say that it is healthier, as well as a better plan for long-term sustainability than the meal-replacements-only plan. I don’t think that is a terrible goal to shoot for… say, by the end of the month (today is February 2).

    The last two days have been beautiful cigar weather, and today should be little different… as long as the balcony is covered. The current temperature is 3°C, with light rain. The rain is set to turn to snow by 7pm, but I will be teaching by then, so it is of no concern. Princess Sophie has an appointment with the vet at noon (her vaccines are due, and she should meet her new Canadian doctor), but we should be home by 1:30pm. A buddy might come to join me for a cigar, but whether he does or does not, I plan to spend a couple of hours fumigating my balcony, watching the world go by. And then teaching, and then bed.

    One thing that is missing from my planned schedule for the day is napping. I find myself with more energy than I had just two weeks ago, when I would regularly take naps in the middle of the day to get through it. That is not to say that I do not take them – I am up every day before 7:30am and I am teaching most nights until 11:30pm, so it is not unreasonable to do so. With that said, I do not feel the same need to sleep in the middle of the day (almost every day) that I did when I was at my heaviest. I am pleased to have more energy than I did, and look forward to that getting even better.

  • Day 11

    The contrast between my plans for Saturday (yesterday) and Sunday (today) could hardly be vaster. Yesterday, Princess Sophie and I drove to Strathroy (two hours away) to spend a few hours with my friends and godson and goddaughter (and their dog), then to Cambridge (about halfway home) to spend a few hours enjoying cigars and the company of other friends, and then home by just past midnight. The plan for today consists chiefly of writing, taking Princess Sophie for a few walks, watching some TV, and… yeah, that’s about it. In short, today shall be a relaxing day. Oh, I also plan to re-season my humidor, as well as continue sorting my clothes by size. Neither of these is exactly taxing.

    When we last visited with our hero, he was concerned that there would be a lot of opportunity for him (me) to veer from the program. (Switching from the third person NOW) I thought about it… several times. At one point, I even decided to do it… and did not.

    My first thought to cheat (and only real opportunity) came an hour into the drive, when we pulled into a truck stop for a bio break. As we walked into the store, the lady behind the counter told me that she cannot allow dogs inside. As I apologetically explained that Princess Sophie is a registered Emotional Support Animal, she pooped on the doormat. I was more than a little embarrassed! I promptly cleaned it all up, and then promised to hold her in my arms while we were on the premises. After peeing (which was an extreme need by this point), I prepared a cup of coffee for myself, and for a flash I thought to look for a beef or turkey (or any non-pork) sausage. Truck stops are famous for their dried meats. I felt bad about Sophie’s accident and wanted to buy more than a cup of coffee. In the end, I opted to simply buy the coffee, and let the cashier keep the change (which will benefit her directly instead of the store). I was not truly hungry, and within 45 minutes I would be due my second meal replacement of the day… it was just a question of buying something to make up for the poop.

    As I pulled away from my friends’ house in Strathroy, I ate my third meal replacement of the day. It was overdue, and quite welcome. However, as you likely know, it can take your brain twenty minutes to get the message from your stomach that you are no longer hungry. As I merged from the 402 onto the 401, I was tempted to stop and pick up either a sausage or a bag of almonds. The conversation with my girlfriend distracted me, and I did not.

    As I pulled off the highway in Cambridge, I decided I was hungry, and I was going to stop and get one of those snacks. I saw the Tim Hortons sign (they are ubiquitous in Canada) and pulled into their drive thru. It was not until I was driving away with my coffee that I realized that a) I had not purchased a snack, and b) It was not an unreasonable time to have my fourth meal replacement of the day. I enjoyed the bar, and when I arrived at my friend’s house, was sated. So much so that the bags of chips and bowls of (sugared) peanuts did not lure me away from the safety of my diet. I had the coffee… but that was it! Of course, I also had three Cuban cigars over the next five hours, so maybe I would have been distracted anyways!

    We left later than planned, owing to the fact that one of my friends’ girlfriends challenged me to darts. The last time she and I played (probably five years ago) I beat her soundly. I am never one to deny someone a rematch. While it was not stated in advance, I originally planned to plan a best-of-nine match, and that is how it worked out… with my coming out on top four games to three.

    It was nearly 11:30pm when we said our goodbyes and hit the road. It was now nearly six hours since my last meal replacement, and I once again started thinking about cheating. I was also thinking how tired I was, and how the sooner we got home, the better off we would be. No stops were made along the way. Arriving home shortly after midnight, I was hungry. I had my fifth and final meal replacement bar of the day, and then we went to bed.

    I should mention that while I likely did consume ‘enough’ water, I did not drink nearly as much as I have done over the last few days. Before I left for Strathroy, I drank a full bottle (74 ounces), and I took a cup with me (another sixteen ounces). That was all through by 1:00pm. I had a cup of coffee at Cam and Amanda’s, but no water. At Ryan’s I had a commercial bottle (probably 20 ounces), and when I got home, I drank another cup or so. All in all, probably 110 ounces. When I have been mostly sequestered at home, I am drinking over 200 ounces in a day. While I am not disappointed by 110 ounces of water (which is over 3 litres), I wonder if spreading that intake out better over the course of the day might be a better strategy. After all, nearly three quarters of that intake was before noon.

    I am proud of myself that I was able to make it through the day without a single cheat. I did drink more coffee than I normally would (five cups, rather than my usual 2.5), but that does not seem to have bothered my weight loss. The bathroom scale this morning has me down another 2.5 lbs from yesterday morning! I just wish I trusted it.

    I met my diet buddy yesterday! She came by early to pick up her share of the meal replacements that I had purchased for us the previous day. She is very nice, and while we were both in a rush (not only did we both have things to do, it was also 28°C below zero, so we did not want to linger out in the cold), I am sure we will at some point sit down for a coffee, or a glass of water, to discuss our progress. Our phone calls are helpful, but human contact might be more so… especially in these strange times when so many of us are working from home and not socializing much.

    Day 11 in my previous weight loss attempt made for an interesting read. It was the first time I ever documented that I was not optimistic about a future with Liza, despite the fact that I had moved from Ottawa, Canada to Los Angeles, California to be close with her, and it was that day that I was officially moving into her house. The relationship would last another seven months, but I was not really happy with her. In truth, I should have ended things with her much sooner than I did.

    On that day (Day 11), I had a conversation with someone on a Facebook support group about ketosis, and how not all calories are created equal. She had indulged in what she thought to be a 480-calorie indulgence at a particular fast-food restaurant. I had to explain to her that those calories not only contained a lot of sugars and chemicals that were unhealthy, but they were also nutritionally devoid of the nutrients her body needed, and that they were likely to affect (if not destroy) her ketosis, which meant the body would once again fight back against the process.

    On that day, I enumerated the benefits of doing the program while living alone over living with others who were not on the program. I have already called that out, so I won’t revisit it.

    It is interesting to see how many similarities there are in my thoughts and feelings at every point along the way. I think that is why I write… because if my three attempts at extreme weight loss have produced three similar experiences and thoughts and emotions, then it is likely that others will be having similar experiences, thoughts, and emotions… and it is nice to know that you are neither alone nor all that different from so many others.

  • Day 10

    I will spare you the ‘what I read in my previous journal’ wisdom today… the entry is not long or impressive, nor in any way insightful.

    I stepped on the scale this morning and was pleased with the number. When you are on an extreme plan such as this one, there are going to be days with multi-pound losses… especially at the beginning. Today’s drop was about 3.4 lbs, which is good… except that I still do not trust the scale because of the lack of stable integrity of the floor on which it sits. The first place I had placed it showed me down over fifteen pounds (from yesterday, not overall), which while impressive is not realistic. There are people who like to just hear good no matter the voracity of the statement. I refer to that as ‘blowing sunshine up my bum.’ I would rather have the real skinny (pun intended as an afterthought) rather than the fake pipe dreams.

    Last night, my girlfriend and I (she beams every time I call her out) spent some time sorting my pants by size. In the end, I had four buckets: Size 44+ (current), Size 42, Size 40, and Size 38/36. I placed each into a clearly marked bag, and then placed all of the ‘not yet’ size bags into a plastic storage bin. The ‘current’ sizes went into my armoire. I should mention that I denote it as 44+ because there are a couple of pair of Size 46 that I suspect are cut quite small and might actually fit for a few weeks. I will try them on this morning to see. If they are too large, they will go into a new group I hope to create and grow soon: the ‘these are too big for me’ sizes. Sometime over the next few days, we will go through the same process with my shirts, which will need to be broken down into more categories (long sleeve, short sleeve, collar vs. no collar, etcetera). Knowing now that she has a little something for men’s’ clothing, it will not be too hard to convince her to help!

    Fitness is going to play a big part in my weight management strategy, and it is odd that I have not made any mention of it yet. By Day 10 in previous journals, I had discussed long walks I had gone on, or plans to make use of my gym membership. Because of the pandemic the gyms are currently closed (or extremely limited). With the windchill it is currently -28°C outside, and because of a recent injury I am walking on a bad leg. I call this all out because I want to be clear that I will start walking soon. Yes, I am taking Princess Sophie out for her walks, but at these temperatures she does not want to go very far either. I will wear my fitness watch… but I have not been wearing it religiously these last few weeks.

    What I will say regarding my fitness watch, which I have put on a few times, is that the band is much larger on me than it was. No, it has not stretched; my wrist has shrunk noticeably with the diet. Woohoo!

    My plans for today are the busiest I’ll have had since the diet started: this morning my diet buddy came by to pick up her share of the product I picked up yesterday. It was the first time we had met, which is cool because it feels like we know each other so well. Princess Sophie is always excited when someone she has never met before greets her by name… it reminds her that she is famous, if only ‘Internet Famous.’

    In a couple of hours, I will drive out to Strathroy, which is a two-hour drive from here. I have a godson (Douglas) and a goddaughter (Cynthia) who live out there (with their parents, of course) and I have not seen them since Canadian Thanksgiving. I was supposed to go there for Christmas, but they were all sick. I was supposed to go there a few weeks ago, but there was a potential Covid exposure, and the mom had to quarantine. Today, everyone is healthy, and it will be great to see them all again. Amanda will be disappointed that I told her not to prepare food for me because of my diet… she knows that I love her cooking, and that is one of the ways she shows she loves her people. I will not discuss the Thanksgiving turkey dinner that she prepared… but it was out of this world! I am thrilled that I will be able to see my friends… who really are family! (Cheat note: If you have a friend that you want to be able to legitimately call family, make them the godfather (or godmother) to one or all of your children!)

    If there was going to be a dinner involved, I would likely have stayed there all evening… but as there is not, I will take my leave around 5:30pm, and drive to Cambridge to see another friend. He is a good buddy who has had some difficult times with anxiety over the last few months, and I like to check in on him every few weeks. Usually, it is as his place of work (which is much closer to home than Cambridge), but this is not only en-route, but he also has a heated garage/man cave/cigar lounge. It was he and his buddy (another friend of mine) who helped to bring my new humidor from the previous owner’s house (yes, my humidor is that big that it took two men with a pickup truck to transport) a few weeks ago. While I did gift them each a handful of cigars for their efforts, it was too cold to smoke here, so we will enjoy a cigar together this evening (one of mine, I promise) to thank them once again for their efforts.

    All in all, today will involve at least four hours of driving, in addition to several hours at friends’ houses who will all a) try to feed me, and b) have food out and about for everyone else, as I am the only one on this crazy diet. I will have to make it my primary mission to redouble my willpower, and to not succumb to any temptations. What I might do, when driving from Strathroy to Cambridge, is to try to find an all-beef sausage somewhere… or better yet, just a package of almonds. I will only do this if I really feel my resolve weakening. Hopefully, I will be able to get through it all without veering from the program. Just in case, I will take an extra meal replacement bar with me… which truly would be the best possible way to address the need to ‘cheat.’

    In summary, today cannot help but to be a great day for friends and stuff… but for it to be a great (and successful) diet day will depend entirely on me, and my willpower. As with so many things in life, today will be what I make of it.

  • Day 7

    If I get through the day, I will have made it through a full week. I am excited, elated, but most of all I am relieved. I know that the hardest part is actually getting started. To quote from my previous weight loss journal: “My diet is becoming more of a habit than a chore.” Okay, that is paraphrasing… but as the original author I hereby grant myself that permission and license.

    The problem between then and now is that the numbers on the scale are not dropping like I did last time. On Day 7 in 2019 I wrote that I had lost 16.8lbs thus far. As I cannot rely on the accuracy of my bathroom scale at my present weight, it is possible that I am on the same pace… but if I were to trust the numbers as they have recorded, I am well under that. Even with my guesstimate being where it is, I am down under 13lbs this morning. While that is a respectable (if not amazing) first week loss, I cannot help but long for the bigger surge lost last time.

    I am feeing better than I did a week ago. Both sitting at my desk, and when I was out walking my dog, I feel somewhat more comfortable in myself. That might all be in my head, and it could be that my knee is getting better… or it could be that I am suddenly walking about with 10lbs less of a load, and by any measure that is significant.

    I got through my class last night on three lozenges, spread throughout the five hours. I made a couple of timing mistakes, but they worked out well, and I ended up giving the class two 15-minute breaks on top of their 30-minute dinner break instead of one. The problem was that at the end of the last break I started the lecture, and ten minutes later I realized I had not had my last meal replacement… and I was hungry and sluggish. Rather than trying to soldier through (which would have meant eating that last meal replacement at 11:45pm), I told the class I needed a quick bio-break, and I snuck off camera to eat the last bar. My water intake for the day was good too…

    Midway through the afternoon, I realized that I was hungry. It was literally just ninety minutes after my lunch shake. I actually sat down and wrote a blog article about it (Hunger), and how I decided to not cheat, rather I went outside, braved the cold, and smoked a cigar. Even under the heater I had to bundle myself up and keep my gloves on, but the cigar accomplished its goal… I forgot my hunger and resumed my meal replacement schedule on track. I will consider that a big win for Day 6.

    My diet buddy told me this morning that she is not doing as well. She had a bad day yesterday, but has not elaborated on it, other to say that her head is not in it. She is a teacher and will not be available to talk until the end of the day, but I am going to try to get her on the phone and see what I can do to support and encourage her.

    I posted just yesterday that my first goal is to comfortably wear a pair of pants that don’t fit. I am going to try them on today. If I have lost 15lbs then they I should at least be able to close the buckle, if not actually wear them comfortably. We’ll see. I suppose I should make it a priority to go through all of the clothes that I have and sort them by size, so that as I do start to shrink, I can simply grab the next bin, rather than constantly having to rummage through things. I might do that today.

    No rest for the wicked… time for me to actually start being productive! Have a great day everyone!

  • Hunger

    It is 2:30pm on Day 6, and I am hungry. I had my first meal replacement around 9:30am and then my second at 1:00pm, which means I am not due for my next one until 4:30pm… but I am hungry. Crap.

    I am not sitting around bored today. I have work to do, and I am also making notes for my class this evening. This would be worse if I was bored. What should I do?

    Since I have not taken a real lunch hour today, I am going to see how windy it is outside. If it is not too bad, I might have a cigar. The temperature (on my phone) is reading -6°C with a windchill of -12°C, but as I discussed in an earlier article, those are the measurements down by the water. If it is not too uncomfortable, I think I’ll bundle myself up, make a hot cup of coffee, and sit outside with a cigar.

    I could easily add another protein bar. If I cannot take my mind off of my hunger then I might do that. What I am hoping to do though is to make eating my last resort, rather than my go-to solution to make things better.

    I’m still drinking a lot of water, but I do not think that I have had nearly as much today as I have the last couple of days. I wonder if that might be one of the reasons for my hunger. Before I go outside I’m going to take a big glass full and see if that helps at all. Of course, before I go outside I will also relieve myself, so that I don’t have to do so fifteen minutes into my cigar.

  • The First Cigars

    Of course, these were not my first cigars… but when my friend came over, we decided to brave the cold, and we were pleasantly surprised.

    I was worried that I would not be able to smoke cigars for a few weeks because of the cold and the wind, but as I suspected this morning it turns out that my local weather reporting is from the lake, and sitting outside for 90 minutes (while bundled up and with the heater on high) was quite comfortable.

    This is a real relief. It is not that I am addicted and needed the tobacco. I always enjoy cigars, but when the smoking experience is unpleasant, I simply don’t smoke. Unlike cigarettes, cigars are not addictive. My concern, as I stated earlier, is that while dieting – and especially in the first week or two of my diet – smoking a cigar is a good distraction to take me away from eating. It is now coming up to 4:30pm, and I have only had two meal-replacements today. I will have my next one as soon as I finish this entry, leaving me either three hours and three hours between this and the next and the last (which will take me to 10:30pm), or even 3.5 hours and 3.5 hours (which will take me to 11:30pm). While this might sound late to eat, I mentioned that I am working, and I might not be finished until 2-3am. We will see how things progress.

    My water intake has been good – I am nearly finished my second water bottle of the day, and I also downed another (smaller) bottle. To now, I am about 140oz of water into the day, which would be a fine daily consumption were I to stop now. I will not, of course, and will likely be closer to (if not over) 200oz on the day.

    If I did not have to monitor the progress of my server migration for work every 15 minutes, today would have been a very relaxing day!

  • Cigars and Timing

    If you are a regular reader of either of my other blogs, or a friend (either Facebook or otherwise) you know that I am a cigar smoker. When I went through the program in California a couple of years ago, I found that smoking cigars was a good way to not be tempted by food. After all, a cigar might last from 40-90 minutes, and I never eat while smoking. It would satisfy the ‘oral urge’ that is the reason we sometimes snack, and it is a good way to pass the time.

    Speaking with my (then) doctor, he told me that of course he would not endorse any form of smoking. I told him that I often smoke them as a substitution for eating, and he said that it was not an entirely terrible idea, as at the time obesity was the greater health risk.

    On Day 0 (Wednesday) I sat outside on the balcony with a friend and smoked a cigar. The temperature was about 3° Celsius, and with the heater going it was very nice.

    The following day, the (high) temperature dropped to -8°. Saturday was a bit warmer, but way too windy to be enjoyable.

    All this to say that I am on Day 4 of the program, and I have not been able to enjoy a cigar since I started. That is just bad timing. It is during the first week that I need the distraction most, and not being able to have it means I am going to spend more time thinking about food, which is what I do not want to do.

    As the clock approaches noon on Sunday, the Environment Canada web site says that the temperature is -6°C, but with the windchill it feels like -12°C. That is not comfortable smoking weather. With that said, those readings are measured at the lift bridge, which is right on the shore of Lake Ontario (and of Burlington Bay), where I suspect it is not only windier, but cooler than here… even though it is only 9km from here. As such, I have spoken with a friend who is planning to come over for a cigar in a couple of hours. We reasoned that if it is too cold for a cigar, then we can still chat inside.

    If there is one reason why the program was probably easier for me to succeed with living in Southern California than it is in Canada, it is that. In another few weeks the temperatures will be on an upswing, and it will not be hard for me to sit outside with a good cigar. For now, I know that the temperatures over the next ten days or so are not going to be terribly conducive to my hobby, but if the wind is not too bad then I should be okay. In the meantime, if I am ever stupid enough to go on such an extreme weight loss program while living in Canada in the future… I’ll try to plan it to start in April and take me through the summer, when the smoking will be more comfortable.