Losing a part of me

Category: Temptations

  • Day 26: FAILED

    I fell off the wagon yesterday.

    I went to a Lodge and… well, it would be so easy to say that I succumbed to peer pressure, that I was encouraged or urged to eat. In truth, I just fell into old habits and did not pay attention. I asked to make sure the chili had no pork, I made sure to add onions but not cheese… but I had two large helpings of turkey chili which is extremely not on my program. The result? I gained 2.0 lbs. from yesterday. F&ck.

    Today might have become another difficult cheat day because I am going to another Lodge this evening, and I will be encouraged to eat there. With that said, I think someone mentioned they are serving pizza, and while I love pizza, most of it will not be kosher. It they have a cheese or veggie pie then I might allow myself a single slice… not two, one.

    I am already looking and feeling better than I did less than a month ago when I embarked upon this journey, and I am not going to fall off the wagon. I am, however, going to allow myself to recognize that I am not a machine, and eating only the same meal replacements for months on end will be hard. Coming into this holiday season, I am going to have a couple of turkey dinners where I can splurge. I will not go overboard, but I do love turkey. I am dating a lovely lady and I will take her out… and eat salads. I will try to separate the ‘cheat meals’ with several days of staying on my program.

    I had an interaction at my bar last night that left me a bit floored. There is a woman there that I went on a date with a couple of months ago. We kissed but nothing more. She seemed to really like me, but succumbed to peer pressure from some of her other friends at the bar who convinced her that dating me was a bad idea. The words ‘Fucking Jew’ were mentioned among the only solid reasons for this. For the most part, I did not really care. I moved on. I would say hello to her at the bar, but that was about it. Before I decided to not pursue her any further, she broke her word to me several times. She stood me up on two occasions when we were supposed to meet, she promised she would text me so that we could talk but never did, and she promised to pay me back for something (less than $20).

    Last night she was there with the guy who convinced her I was an FJ and bad news. I did not feel any need to interact. I’m sure you will agree that was the best strategy. I enjoyed my cigar, I sang a few karaoke songs, and I was getting ready to go home when she got me to come over and to speak with her and a friend of hers (not the guy). She told me that her friend had nowhere to go, and she was wanted me to bring the friend home with me. For some context, the friend is quite attractive. I am reasonably sure that had I agreed, I would be quite a bit more tired this morning than I am. The woman told me ‘She is very safe and trustworthy. I can vouch for her.’

    I said no. I did it politely, and told them both that it was out of the question. The woman asked me why not, if she vouches for her? I told her she did not want to know the answer. She insisted.

    I told her that she had no credibility with me, and that her vouching for the woman actually worked against her, rather than in her favour.

    She tried to turn it around on me that I don’t want to help her because she never slept with me, and then focused on that I don’t like that she hangs around with Kevin.

    I told her that I did not know who Kevin was. (I was telling the truth, although it was safe to assume that Kevin was the guy who called me an FJ. He was also the guy she was hanging out with that evening, and who she seemed to make out with a few times although I can’t be sure) I told her truthfully that I could not trust her because she had lied to me a number of times, and because of the decisions she makes.

    In short, this woman is going to start talking trash about me at the bar. She has no real ammunition, but lies are plentiful.

    I told the girl I am dating the whole story. I did not want her hearing it from anyone else. I think she agrees that I handled it properly. Phew!

    Okay, it is time for me to have my lunch. My new order of meal replacements arrived yesterday so I have the beef stew readying. It is not quite mouth watering, but it is tasty.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 25 – Lucky or not?

    I picked up my date last night and we drove to the restaurant which had me worried because of my diet. I am glad that I planned ahead, but in fact there were not a lot of opportunities for me to fall off my diet.

    We had dinner at a seafood restaurant. To be clear, this was not surf and turf… this was sink or swim. My date ordered something very not kosher, with an appetizer of something else VERY not kosher. Nothing to tempt me. I ordered the salad with grilled salmon with balsamic vinaigrette. Perhaps they were a bit heavy on the dressing, but it was fine.

    After dinner we went to another spot to enjoy a cigar, and she had another drink. At some point she ordered a piece of pecan pie. I was not at all tempted by it, even though she bragged about how delicious it was.

    On my way home I was hungry so I decided to stop in at the supermarket to get some almonds. My hand slipped and instead of dispensing a handful of nuts, I got something like two pounds worth in the bag. I picked up a different bag and dispensed the right amount. I tried to give the huge bag to the cashier, but she told me that they couldn’t resell them, so I was free to take them. I now have a huge bag of almonds in the pantry… which I do not particularly want. I’ll rephrase: I want… but shouldn’t have. Almonds in moderation are a good occasional snack, but they should not be a regular part of my diet.

    My weight was still down this morning… but only by a couple of ounces.

    This evening I am going to a Lodge meeting and will try to not eat.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 15 – A streak!

    As I was sitting with my friend watching hockey yesterday, she ordered a plate of Buffalo wings. When they arrived, I asked her for the celery (which she was happy to give me, and even ordered extra celery for me). While there is a misconception that celery actually has negative calories, in fact I know that I probably consumed a full fifteen calories in that cheat. If I were to do that every single day of my diet, I would consider it a resounding success.

    Of course, I do not plan to do that every day… but between wanting one of the wings and wanting a piece of celery, I think we can all agree that I made the right call.

    Aside from the celery, I was true to the program again yesterday. That makes three straight days of only meal replacements, and two days of 800 calories. We take our victories where we can, right?

    While I had lost weight before gaining it all back, I now weigh what I did on January 3rd of this year. I have a long way to go to where I want to be, but positive progress is always good.

    I was sleeping so well last night when HRF Princess Sophie told me that she needed to go out. I was not happy about it, but I know she was not feeling well yesterday – she had not one, but two accidents in the house. The first time my son called me to say she had an accident in my room, and he cleaned it up. When I got home she had had another accident, this time in the kitchen… only my son was asleep, so I cleaned it up. My poor girl is usually very regular and disciplined, so when this happens it means that she is having tummy issues, and I take it seriously. We went out at about 12:15am, and even though I forgot my phone at home, I stayed out with her until I felt she was ready to go back inside – around 12:45am. Fortunately I was able to get right back to sleep, and my pretty girl snuggled into me comfortably for the night.

    It has been just over five months since I moved from Canada. When I arrived – or at least, the day that I unpacked my bathroom scale – I weighed three pounds less than I do today. That was my lowest weigh-in since arriving. I suppose then that will be my first milestone to achieve. I hope I will be able to hit it within the next week, and at the pace I am going it might be as soon as Thursday or Friday. I suppose my next big milestone after that would be to reach my lowest weight of 2026; As of today, that is just over twenty-six pounds away. With that said, that would be forty-nine pounds from my starting point, so really it should be within a few days of my goal of fifty by New Years. Let’s just put those two milestones together as one.

    I am sometimes an idiot! I have had in my mind when I hit that twenty-pounds down mark that I then had a little over a month to lose the rest of the fifty pounds I was shooting for by News Years. I just a few minutes ago realized that as of today there are sixty-six days until New Years Eve, which means I don’t have just over a month… I have just over two months left! That changes things. It is not that I am going to ease off my efforts; rather, I am going to change my goal. I am not going to advertise it, but I would love to have lost (from Day 1, two weeks ago today) seventy-five pounds by New Years Day. That would be 75 pounds in 80 days… and while it would be one helluva feat, it would not be unprecedented for me on this program. All that is required is that I do not cheat… not one bit.

    How should I maximize my chances of success with that plan to not cheat? A lot of it will involve planning ahead. For example: When I leave the apartment at 3pm, I might be out until 11pm some nights. If I have had three meal replacements before I leave the house, I should make sure to bring two with me to have as needed. I have a small cooler that I can take with me to ensure that the bars to not melt; I did that yesterday with good results. That way, rather than being tempted to eat ‘out in the wild,’ I will have what I am meant to be eating. Yes, I know that I could if needed buy a small packet of almonds; I do not want to do that. What I want to do is stay on my damned program! I also need to remember to drink a lot of water. In my case, this is simple – when I arrive at my local bar every one of the bartenders knows to pour me a pint of soda water… and to keep refilling the glass as needed. I love the staff there!

    If I do succeed in losing 75 pounds by New Years Eve then that will also take me somewhat significantly under a major psychological number. How great would that be?

    I think I mentioned yesterday that I did a whole lot of organizing in my room. My next step is the closet, which I spent twenty minutes on today (and it needs hours more). One of the things that I need to do – which I took a good swing at this morning – is to sort out my clothes (specifically my custom tailored suits, jackets, and shirts) by weight category. Once I have done that, I can put them away in drawers or bins which will go a long way to decluttering my closet. I realized, as I went through things, that I have a lot of clothes that fit in the range of about 60-70 pounds lower than I am now. I can live with that… but it will take me a huge effort to get there. I am going to get there. In fact, I am going to get past there so that I can fit into the clothes that I had made when I weighed one hundred pounds less than I do today. It is just going to take time, focus, and dedication.

    Okay, I suppose I should close out for now. I have some things I need to get done today that are actually work. Have a great day folks!

  • 2026 Day 3

    Irrelevant to my progress, I realized yesterday after I published my daily entry that I had already used the title Day 1, Day 2, etc… and so in order to make things clear, I am changing the titles. Today’s year-Day is not set in stone, but it’s what I came up with for now.

    I cheated yesterday. It took me less than 48 hours to fall off the wagon. Fortunately, it was not a terrible fall. After my third meal replacement I went out to visit with friends. On my way there I realized I was very hungry, and I did not want to arrive at their place and see temptations on the table. I stopped off and bought a handful of peanuts, which I ate in the car as I drove down there.

    When I arrived I realized that I had absolutely made the right decision. Before I even sat down, I was told that there were delicious fried chicken wings over here, and sour gummies over there. Less than an hour earlier I was speaking with my new diet buddy and she told me that a cup of celery per day was allowed on the program. With that knowledge, I took two spears of celery from the bowl of crudités before sitting down to light my cigar. Despite the temptations that were everywhere, I did not indulge.

    I had told my diet buddy that I was not going to start integrating celery into my program, but I am beginning to rethink that decision. I am going to reevaluate that decision. I have not made a decision yet, but I will think about it. I do have to go to the supermarket today to pick up a quart of milk for my coffee, and depending on how I feel (and how they look in the produce section) I might pick up a celery. We shall see.

    It is important to point out that while other vegetables might be healthy, celery is probably the lowest calorie vegetable per volume, with a medium stalk containing six (6) calories. There is a myth that we burn more calories than that when eating it which is untrue, but it is still a very healthy way to get full (and get more dietary fibre) without any of the negative contents (carbohydrates, starches, sugars) that I am trying to avoid.

    Aside from milk and celery, I also need to fill my propane tanks if I have any plans to smoke on the balcony this week. While the forecast high temperatures will be above zero through Thursday, there might be wind which would make that uncomfortable… but in case it is not, I would like to have the option. I am seldom tempted to snack when I am smoking a cigar.

    I remembered yesterday that one of the most important things to remember when dieting is to drink a lot of water. I was negligent on that on Thursday, but yesterday I refilled my 30oz bottle at least three times throughout the day. It might have been four. I do know that I spent a lot more time running to the latrine than I usually do. I will try to keep that up. The weekend might be more challenging because I do not think about it, but during the week while I am teaching it will be easier. I will make a point of trying to drink at least two litres every day, which is a little more than sixty-five ounces. During the week when I am teaching that will be easier, but I am already at least a third of my way there this Saturday afternoon. Not too bad!

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1299

    As I lay in bed unable to sleep from 5:30pm until I did something about it around 8:00pm, I believe I learned an important lesson. While it is not good for my weight loss progress to overeat, it is also bad for me to undereat. Yesterday I was thinking about other things, and by the time I got into bed I had only eaten two meal replacements. For all of the people who have told me that my usual 900 calories per day is unhealthy (despite what the medical professionals have told me), I know that 450 calories is a bad idea. I tell my student all the time that good and bad are subjective. Objectively, without judgement, undereating prevents me from falling asleep. Last night was the second night in the last week that I consumed significantly fewer than my normal 900 calories, and it was the second time that I could not fall asleep. Eventually I got out of bed and had another meal replacement, bringing my daily total to 675 calories. I still had difficulties falling asleep, but I got back into bed and rested until I did. I might have gotten two hours of sleep… but I doubt it. I will take a nap this afternoon.

    I am back to teaching ridiculous hours, which means that my weigh-ins are going to be at crazy hours. Well, that is not fair… I will be working from 1:30am until noon, which means that I will be weighing myself around 1:00am every weekday for the next two weeks. That began this morning, and my weight was exactly what it was yesterday morning at my regular time. Considering the lack of sleep and no bowel movements, I am not displeased with that. For the next ten weekdays I will weigh myself at the same time, and will hopefully continue to see my weight drop.

    I have written about this before, but I was reminded of it today. I hate food commercials. When I am trying to lose weight and to maintain my discipline it is just evil to show me wonderful tasty and extremely unhealthy foods which I love, crave, and absolutely cannot eat. It is not only TV commercials, it is also billboards, TV shows and movies, TikTok and Facebook reels… you get the picture. I want it all! I am also aware just how guilty I felt yesterday morning when I realized that the ground I had lost was because of those stupid onion rings. However tempting it is, it is a temporary satisfaction followed by days of guilt and self-loathing. That does not mean that I like the temptation. Seeing those ads is not easier for knowing that I would hate myself if I succumbed to temptation. I am not saying that anyone is guilty – freedom of expression extends to ads – I am just saying that when I am trying to lose weight I hate it.

    So far I have stuck to the plan for the day… at 1:00am I had my first meal replacement, and while I am starting to feel hungry (itis currently 5:15am) I will be able to make it through to my lunchtime – after I walk Princess Sophie. By my calculations that should have me enjoying that second shake in 90 minutes. I am drooling with anticipation!

    Okay, it is time for me to get back to work. Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1290

    I was in bed and asleep at a reasonable hour last night… but when I woke up to pee around 1:10am I got into my head. My worries over both of my children (who are of very different ages and who have very different problems right now) kept me awake for a couple of hours. My sleep before and after that was good, which is how I ended up with a sleep score of 67… but yeah, I had it pretty accurate – looking at the data from my fitness watch, I was awake from 1:06am to 3:06am. I likely would have slept another 30-60 minutes were it not from a phone call from my son the elder at 8:30am. I have heard from him more this past week than likely any time in the past decade, and I am so grateful for it! I will also not be upset with him for a phone call at 8:30am, even if it did wake me up. Sorry society, but that is not an unreasonable hour for a call!

    My weight dropped a full pound from yesterday! That brings my current weight loss to 28.2 lbs. in 24 days. That is certainly nothing to sneeze at! I did cheat with peanuts again yesterday, but I find that if I replace one meal replacement with a reasonable amount of unsalted peanuts then it does not harm my progress. It is when I have the peanuts in addition to my complement of meal replacements that I get into trouble. That, and the day of my exam when I ate salted peanuts (because that was what was available).

    Today will be a challenge because I am taking my son the younger for lunch. I know that I will be tempted, but I will do my best to stay strong. I cannot give in to temptation! I will also then take him grocery shopping, and the instructions from his mother are to let him buy what he wants. The only item I need for myself is coffee, and I hope I do not forget. If I do, then I will be scrambling tomorrow morning!

    It is another beautiful day, and my friend Eduardo is coming over this afternoon. He needs help with his computer, and I am always happy to see him. I doubt that his issues will take me more than a few minutes to solve, after which we will sit and enjoy a cigar on the balcony.

    I scheduled another certification exam for Wednesday because I have been asked to teach the class the following week. While it is certainly a topic I will not have any issues with, they want me to be certified so I will take the exam. I will also spend some time studying over the next few days – while I am not worried, I still want to be prepared. I spent more time studying for the CISSP exam than for any I have ever taken… and it felt good to know that pass or fail, I gave it my all. Seeing as I have work I need to do on Monday and Tuesday, I will spend some time this afternoon (after Eduardo leaves) and tomorrow with my head in the books.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1284

    In my usual manner, I woke up this morning to the same morning routine as always. Impatient as I am with my weight loss progress, I was still satisfied with the same-old .8 lbs. drop from yesterday. I say same-old because following the initial tremendous drop the first few days, the most common day-over-day drop has been that. I got dressed, took Her Floofness for her walk, and then returned home to feed her, make coffee, and prepare my meal replacement.

    Between preparing all of that and actually starting to ingest it I felt the urge, and went to the water closet to try… and indeed succeeded. Yay! I decided that since I had not already eaten that I would get nekkid and re-weigh myself. Dropping another .6 lbs. from my initial attempt, it brought me to a great milestone: since Day 1 (today is Day 18) I have officially dropped twenty-five pounds!! That is no small feat, and is certainly worthy of recognition.

    Wonder of wonders, my sleep score this morning was good for the third day straight… and the second night in three was a 90+. Okay, it was 90 on the dot, but that is still considered excellent. I cannot think of too many times since I started wearing this watch that my sleep score was ninety or better. I am going to do my best to make sure I am in bed and with the lights out by 11:00pm as often as I can. That seems to be making a difference.

    As planned, I spent the afternoon yesterday in St. Catharines with a couple of masonic brothers – one of which I have known and been friends with since before I was initiated, the other one who I have only known on Facebook. He and I hit it off like gangbusters. There is a saying that in Freemasonry there are no strangers, only friends you haven’t met yet. I don’t know about that; I do know that this gentleman and I absolutely hit it off in our love of History, our first-hand knowledge of the Middle East, and our understanding of and respect for each other’s culture. I am so glad that I drove down there, and it was worth the nearly 2.5 hours I sat in traffic on the QEW.

    Unfortunately, I was weak… I stopped along the way to pee and decided while I was there to pick up some peanuts. At least they were the unsalted kind. While all cheating is cheating, there are better and worse cheats. It turns out though that it was a good thing that I cheated. When I arrived at his house he offered me an alcoholic beverage (I politely declined, explaining to him that my current diet forbids it), and there were bowls of snacks – party mix, nuts (the salted kind), and chips freely available and within arm’s reach. Had I not eaten the unsalted peanuts en route there is a very good chance that I would have succumbed to these temptations. He also offered up that his wife makes the most amazing zaatar pita that I have tasted outside of Lebanon, and would gladly make some for us. I asked for a rain cheque for when I was not on my diet. This was probably the hardest offer I have had yet to refuse. If you know, you know.

    My son the elder is coming over this afternoon for a drink. Next weekend his mother is driving him down to North Carolina to begin his Master program at university, and this will be the last time we sit down before that. He and I have had a complicated relationship, and while he has freely admitted over the past decade or so that I have made huge positive changes, it still took him a long time to fully trust and accept ‘the new me.’ Over the last few months he has reached out to connect with me a handful of times; I suspect he thinks me a good sounding board for some of his thoughts and ideas, and when I do offer advice (which I try to do sparingly and only when asked) it is reasonable and wise… and from a very different perspective from what his mother and the other adults in his life might offer. He does from time to time like to try to shock me as well; while he knows about some of my past, I suspect he knows but the tip of the iceberg of what my true experience is. He has on a few occasions mildly surprised me, but thus far has not come close to shock. I hope he does not push the boundaries in his attempts, because his health and safety are too important to me!

    He is bit of a feinshmecker in many respects, especially with respect to alcohol. He has been working these last couple of years at the largest LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario – the official alcohol retailer in Ontario, and the largest single purchaser of alcoholic beverages in the world), and so for me to have a bottle that he has never seen is always a treat for him. Last month a friend was in British Colombia and sent me a picture of a bottle he came across that was so completely different and that is not available in Ontario. If he does want to try it then yes, I will open the bottle and yes, I will have a dram which will definitely be a diet cheat. It is not every day that my son comes over to celebrate starting a master of law program at a top U.S. school!

    Other than that, I expect today will be a quiet day for me. I will try to get some work done, and might have to spend some time on the balcony reading. While I have been listening to the audio book Moby Dick, I think I am going to revisit one of the early Dan Brown novels that I have sitting on my shelf. He has a new book in the Robert Langdon series coming out in September and I will definitely read it, but I confess I think all of his subsequent novels have paled in comparison to Angels and Demons and the Davinci code. So be it, I will still read the new one. Hope springs eternal.

    Since writing that paragraph I decided to completely organize my bookshelves, organizing them by category. It is amazing how many religious texts I have, in addition to the myriad books on Jewish thinking, on Israel, and on Israel’s wars. Most of these non-religious books in those categories I was given by my father’s widow, a friend of our family for most of my life, when she sold her house and moved into a retirement complex. There are two shelves of cigar books, and a very small one for fiction. I love fiction and read it all the time… I just do not usually keep them when I am done with them.

    Also since writing that paragraph, a buddy of mine texted me and asked if he could come over for a cigar. He is driving here from Grimsby, and while he says he is just passing through and thought it would be great to see me, I know that I saw him yesterday, and he might have something that he needs to talk about. My door is always open for my friends.

    Aside from a wee dram with my son, my plan for today is to stick to the program. I hope I can succeed… I know that I promised that one week from tomorrow I will be recording videos, and I want to look as good as I can. That will not be very good… but at least I can try to drop another five pounds this week.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1055

    At long last I had a productive bowel movement this morning. While it did not completely clear out my system, it certainly had a negative affect on another one… but nothing that a little plunging could not fix.

    I decided to buy a package of rice cakes yesterday. I will not be doing that again. I have disposed of what is left.

    I was relieved that the lodge that I visited yesterday ordered pizza… and that the only ones that did not have meat on it had olives. The former I cannot eat for religious reasons, the latter because I just do not like olives. As such the only cheating I did after the lodge meeting was a dram of whisky proffered by one of the lodge officers. They also invited me to their holiday party this Saturday evening which is being held at a local brewery. I am seldom tempted by beer, but I will go for the camaraderie.

    Yesterday did not go as planned (mostly owing to the rice cakes I would think), but I managed to eke out one small victory. It was 10:30pm before we left the lodge, and I had not yet hit the 6,500 steps mark on my fitness watch. I wrote yesterday that I wanted to extend my steps-goal streak, but when I got home, I still needed to take Her Floofness out for a walk (which would never amount to the 4,500 steps needed to hit the goal. By the time she and I got back in (around 11:15pm) I was still below 7,500 steps. With very little time to spare I changed into my workout kit and got onto the treadmill. I knew that my workout would not be a good steady one, but I wanted to hit my steps-goal. I did the first kilometre at the same 4mph pace I had done my previous jogs at. For the second kilometre I kicked it up to 4.5 mph, and actually felt like I could have gone farther at that speed… or faster. For the last 1.3 kilometres I dropped the pace to a brisk walk. The daily goal was 11,000; I got off the treadmill at 11:45pm with 11,018 steps registered and finished the day with 11,027 (I take my fitness watch off when I get into the shower of course).

    The steps-goal of my fitness watch is a progressive goal. I am not entirely clear on how it works, but apparently Garmin calculates the steps-goal based on the value of the previous week (about) achievements. As such, were I to stay in and do nothing then my steps goal would drop tomorrow, but if I had blown my steps-goal away then it would jump. As an example, there was one day in February when my steps-goal was 8,700, and I took 14,700 steps. My steps-goal the following day was 9,910, and I took 17,742 steps. My steps-goal the day after that was up to 11,480, but I only took 10,900 steps. That would have been enough to crush the steps-goal from any previous day, but because of the huge surplus on Days 1 & 2, it was below the actual goal for Day 3. I am currently on a 10-day streak, but I have been somewhat practical about it, in that I have not vastly exceeded my steps-goal on any given day. On November 30 the goal was 9,740. While there have been a couple of days during the streak when I ‘crushed’ it, most days I have only slightly beaten the calculated goal, so while the goal for yesterday was 11,000, today’s goal is 11,010. I will definitely need to hit the treadmill (or go out for a jog… it’s pretty nice out today), but I will not need to up my game to a new level to extend my streak to eleven days.

    My sleep score was 79, the best it has been in quite a few days. This despite the late-night workout. My body battery peaked at 66, although that is now down to 54. I am sure that before the day is done it will get all the way down again… but hopefully I will have a good night sleep and will be able to recover completely.

    A lodge brother is coming over for a coffee in a little bit, but aside from that and a Zoom meeting I have to attend this evening it should be a quiet and relaxing day. I will certainly hit the treadmill, but I do not think I have too much else going on. With the weather I might even sit outside with a cigar.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 1054

    By all rights my weight should have been up this morning, and not down .6 lb. From yesterday morning. But for a very late delivery guy I would have gained two pounds. I was weak, and when Ryan ordered the pizza, I was really looking forward to having a slice… or two. Fortunately, ninety minutes after he ordered them, they had not yet arrived, and I decided to take my leave. I enjoyed a protein bar in the car, and an omelette when I got home. Yes, I ate some peanuts and even a little popcorn throughout the day, and that was bad. Pizza would have been a disaster. 

    Following my dinner, I got onto the treadmill and jogged 5km. It was the third day in a row that I jogged, and the second that I completed 5km. I am quite happy with that and will try to continue to do that. My next goal is to start increasing the speed and distance… although not necessarily at the same time. I did kick up the pace for the last .2km, but that is not the same. I want to increase my maintained speed, rather than just ‘sprinting’ the last few metres. It will not be a quick increase, but if I do it gradually over time then I will be happy with my results. At my current pace of 4mph I would need over 6.5 hours to run a marathon. By increasing my pace to 5mph that would drop to 5.24 hours. I would still not qualify for the Boston Marathon, but I would be thrilled with myself if I could do that. 

    I am teaching today until 4:30pm, and then I have to go to the supermarket to pick up eggs, milk, and one or two other provisions. I will try to be good and not buy any cheats. At 7:00pm I am visiting a lodge in Burlington with a friend. I have never been to this lodge, but it is much closer to me than my own. By all rights that is where I probably should have joined, but I had my friends at my lodge and here we are. It should be a fun evening. I just have to remember to not eat! 

    My current steps-goal streak is nine days. I am not sure when I will be able to get onto the treadmill, but I will do my best to do so either before or after my lodge visit. I would love to extend the streak to ten days. Actually, according to my fitness watch my longest streak is sixteen days, and I would love to be able to beat that… but I am going to do it one day at a time, which means for today extending my current streak to ten days… and then tomorrow will be tomorrow’s problem. 

    I spoke with a buddy yesterday and we decided that later this week (probably Friday) we are going to drive down to Niagara Falls, NY for the day. We both have a few parcels to ship, and as Canada Post is on strike, there is no inexpensive way to ship anything to the USA. Maybe we will make a day of it (and not just run across and back like our last trip), but if we do then I had better plan ahead. To that end, I now have three protein bars in the armrest of my car so that if I do get hungry, I do not have to settle for foods that are incompatible with my weight loss goals. 

    I started this entry at 8:15am. It is now 12:30pm and we broke for lunch. It has been a pretty easy morning – I am teaching a very high-level overview of a technology that I know, and we will not be getting deep into anything. I just finished my afternoon meal replacement shake and so far, I am feeling satisfied. I hope that continues for the next few hours. If I could get through to the end of class before needing another meal replacement, and then when I get home from the Burlington lodge, I can hit the treadmill for 5km and then have my final mean replacement, then I will have succeeded 100% in my goals for the day… which is to say that I will not have cheated, and I will have had the necessary nutrition, and I will meet my steps/exercise goal. That is the plan. 

    We know, of course, that the best laid plans of mice and men do not always work out… but I am going to try. 

    Have a great day folks! 

  • Day 1053

    I am not sure if today is Day 3 or Day 4 without even a half-decent bowel movement, and I suspect that is having at least some effect on my weight. Yes, I ate the rest of the chicken and salad (that I had purchased on Friday) yesterday, but it was not an unreasonable amount. I also jogged five kilometres on the treadmill. All this to say that I am reasonably sure that if my system was not backed up then I would have dropped more than a couple of ounces from yesterday morning. I am still 3.2 lbs. heavier than I was Wednesday morning.

    Today is going to be a challenge. We are having a holiday get together at a buddy’s place. We will mostly be smoking cigars, but the host asked about our pizza preferences. I told him to not account for me in his pizza planning. He then posted this morning that he is going to pick up special doughnuts. I am going to have to avoid those as well. I have packed three protein bars to take with me and will try to stick to eating only two of them. Whatever I do, when I get home this evening I will be hitting the treadmill.

    Speaking of the treadmill, I did a strong 5km jog yesterday evening. The difference between my quick-walking and actually jogging is the difference between setting the speed to 3.6 to 4.0. It feels good to be able to jog and not tire out as I would have a couple of months ago. I actually feel that the factor that stopped me from a longer jog yesterday was the time constraints – I had a meeting I needed to get to, so I had to cut it short when I did. I will see if I can go longer this evening.

    Over the course of the last couple of hours I have gone to the washroom a couple of times, trying to produce… something. It is hard and painful, but slowly over time I am getting some of that blockage out. It feels as if I have not had any fibre whatsoever. I am thinking that this evening I might consider a laxative to see if that helps.

    My sleep score last night was fair – a 76, which is mostly because I woke up earlier than I might have (especially for a Sunday morning). My body battery was up to 48. While I certainly slept better last night than the previous night, it would seem my body did not recover as well. Hopefully that will get better tomorrow. We will see.

    Speaking of tomorrow, I am teaching for the day. It is an intro course so nothing too deep, but I am looking forward to it. It is my only day teaching this month… yikes. I am glad to have not wasted my downtime… I sat a class, passed two certifications, and next week I am sitting another class to hopefully earn another cert. These two certifications will really increase my value as a trainer and as a consultant. I have gone through slow periods before and truly wasted them. Between November and December, I will have had two days of actual work… but I have definitely not wasted the downtime. Professional advancement is crucial in my line of work, and I have done a lot of that in this period.

    The plan for today is to NOT fall off the wagon, right? Okay… let’s try to make that happen.

    Have a great day folks!