Losing a part of me

I broke another record on the treadmill yesterday. Knowing that my plan was to only run 5km, I set the pace at 4.5mph and was able to keep that pace for the entire workout. In fact, I did 5.5km because I wanted to make sure I did the 3mi as well, whether or not I was breaking records or personal bests. I also earned that 5km weekend running badge that I thought was for last weekend.

I have walked or jogged either on the treadmill, in the streets, or at the mall every day this week except for one, and I am shocked by what I have been able to accomplish. It was only five weeks ago that I set out on my first jog, which did not amount to a full 2.5km. It was only two weeks ago that I did a combined 11km jogging and walking, but the jogging was in two ‘sets’ of 3km, each followed by walking. I never thought that just a couple of weeks later I would be jogging more than I am walking. Tuesday’s 8.2km jog was a real shock for me, and Thursday’s 11km run blew my mind. I knew that if I was going to jog Friday, I would have to set limits for myself… not because I do not want to push myself, but because I have obligations and I wanted to spend as much time as I could with Leslie.

These last fourteen months (it will be fourteen months on Monday!) have been a challenge, but I think I have finally hit my tipping point. Whatever weightlifting or other exercise I have done, and even walking (and I did a lot of walking throughout last spring and summer), I know it has always been jogging that has caused me to shed the pounds best. When combined with proper eating habits, I know that when I run I am going to have an easier time, with a steadier weight loss pace. If I can keep it up throughout the spring and summer, whether outdoors or at the gym, then I know that I will be able to achieve those short-term goals that I have been trying for. If I average a weekly loss of 3.5 lbs. then I will beat my 2020 best by March 30 (less than two weeks away), and my best adult weight on April 10. Those are milestones worth celebrating! For now, I am just happy that this visit to Dallas has been a successful one in almost every way, but with regard to my weight loss, going home weighing less than I did when I arrived is a huge victory for me.

I should mention that I am very close to being able to claim a 130-pound weight loss. That blows my mind! This morning the bathroom scale reads 265.8 lbs., which is absolutely blowing my mind. I am 5.4 lbs. from my best weight in 2020, and I am 10.8 lbs. from my best adult weight. More important for the very short-term is that I am 3 lbs. down from my best weight before my trip, and 3.6 lbs. down from the morning I flew down to Dallas. That drop in one week would be acceptable in any circumstances, but knowing how much I have eaten this past week… I am just amazed, once again, that I can lose weight while eating. That gives me hope that when it is time to wean myself off the program I will be able to maintain my weight, as long as I am mindful about it.

Last night after class Leslie prepared the leftover Chinese food along with some wonderful chicken and lamb skewers that we both enjoy. Because it was the Sabbath, we also shared a bottle of sparkling wine. Normally I can take it or leave it, but the bottle she chose for yesterday was very tasty, and I enjoyed my fair share of it. I had been worried the previous evening because I had some of the rice with my dinner, but I did the same last night without worrying about the consequences. As it turns out, there were none! I will say that yesterday I ate more than I usually do throughout the day – we had a salad for lunch, but I also had two handfuls of almonds and another meal replacement shake throughout the day. I am learning that I have to listen to my body when it tells me that I need calories, especially on the days that I exercise. It is great to have a caloric deficit resulting in weight loss; it is not wonderful when you are lightheaded and almost collapse midday from that caloric deficit.

Today is, sadly, my last full day in Dallas. It is the last day that I will both wake up with and go to sleep next to my wife until the end of April, which always makes us both sad. Fortunately I have booked my next trip down, but there is only so much that we can do. Will the State Department get off their heinies and let me live with my wife please? We will make the most of the day though… we have things to do, but we will start with our now traditional weekend latté and cigar on the balcony, and we will end it with a lovely dinner out for which we will get dressed to the nines. We are hoping that her new dress arrives today, but if it does not then I still know that she will look fabulous in whatever she wears. As for me, the uniform of the evening will be my blue suit, which is the only one I brought with me.

I went to the optometrist yesterday and picked out a new pair of sunglasses. I was really hoping they would be able to switch the lenses from my current pair (which are falling apart) with the previous pair (which are in perfect shape, just the wrong prescription). The lenses are almost identical in shape, but only different enough to prevent them from doing that. I will wear the decrepit pair for the next five weeks, and then will switch to the new pair… which is radically different (but not at all radical). They are also a fancy brand name (which I confess I had never heard of), which will be a change from my previous several pair. Leslie likes me in them, and I confess I like the new look too.

The weather today is not great, but there is no precipitation forecast the next few days. We will probably need sweaters to sit on the balcony, but we are both fine with that. After that, we will head out to run our errands and enjoy the day… and we will try to forget that I have to leave tomorrow. That is a sword hanging over our heads that always makes both of us sad. I will stay mindful today and will be good and true to my modified program, especially knowing that Monday morning I am back on the full-fast for the next five months.

I have given some thought to how long I plan to stay on the full-fast program, as well as the modified program. If I lose an average of .4 lb. per day (2.8 lbs. per week) consistently for the next four months, then on my birthday I will weigh about 222 lbs., which is absolutely incredible to me. If I lose an average of 3.5 lbs. per week (.5 lb. per day) then I will be at 210 lbs. Either way, as long as I do not have a terrible period of stagnation, I will be off the program by then – probably by July 1, a few days before that. As amazing that it is to me that I lost 100 lbs. in the first year of the program, it is absolutely inconceivable to me that from my birthday last year – by which point I had already lost sixty pounds – to my birthday this year, if I stay on this track then I will lose between 110-120 lbs. in the 365 days. If that is not something to strive for then I don’t know what is. To put that in perspective of the lulls and plateaus in my journey, one year ago today I weighed exactly ninety pounds less than I did this morning. All sorts of wow.

I have picked up the latté and I am going to sit on the balcony relaxing. Today will be a day devoid of any stresses or obligations. The only thing that I (quite unfortunately) have to do today is pack… which makes me terribly sad. In an hour or so I am going to get a notice that it is time to check in for my flight, and I will do so sadly. I do not want to go… despite all of the obligations back in Canada.

Have a great day folks.