Losing a part of me

For the second day in a row I stuck to my modified program perfectly yesterday, and I was rewarded for it. Ed McMahon rang my door with a cheque from Publisher’s Clearinghouse for Ten Million Dollars! Okay, no… but I did get to cross another number off on my fridge-side tracker! I dropped 1.4 lbs. from yesterday morning which is absolutely astonishing. It may not be $10 Million, but it is still a very nice minor victory.

I was speaking with Leslie last night about a lot of weight-related issues. One of them is that I am going to the doctor next Thursday, and wouldn’t it be nice if I could show a significant drop in weight from my last weigh-in. At the end of May I weighed 116kg; after that I started my slide which I hope was just a plateau. At the end of June I met with my new doctor for the first time, and I had gained 4.7kg – nearly 11 lbs. I was certain that I had done the worst and would be back on track immediately, but July proved to be a harder month than I thought. I did not actually step onto the scale when I was at the doctor’s at the end of July, but I was up about half a kilo in the month. If I were to step onto her scale today, I should weigh a little more than 5kg less than I did then, and it would be my best weigh-in at the doctor’s office ever. With five days left to go I would love to lose another 2-3 lbs., which would take me under 115kg! That would be my best weigh-in at a doctor’s office since before I went into the Army. Yes, I saw plenty of doctors during my service… but never for a regular check-up. I seem to recall weighing over 260 lbs. when I saw my Canadian doctor the first time after returning, which would have been some time in 1997. I am thrilled to be on this path!

Not only am I thrilled by that, but I am also excited to be able to say something honestly today that I have been dishonest about since May. I have lost 140 lbs. overall. I have not in the last three months amended that when asked, even though at the worst of my sliding I was back to having lost 115 lbs. I am also less than six pounds away from dropping below that monumental milestone: I have not since leaving the Army weighed less than 250 lbs. I achieved that number on May 27 (Day 492)… and then the slipping began. The day that I step onto the bathroom scale and see the number 249.x – it could be 249.999 for all it matters – I will jump for joy. If I am able to stay on track, then I am almost certain to reach that before I fly to California in 3.5 weeks. My wife will see me at the lowest weight that she has ever seen me… and the lowest that anyone has seen me in my post-Army life.

While writing that paragraph I realized something, and I decided to go back to confirm it. While I was a full 5.6 lbs. lower than I am now (according to my spreadsheet, there are nineteen days when I have weighed less), none of those days coincided with us being together. When she woke up this morning, I weighed less than my wife has ever seen me. When she gets out of the shower, I am going to tell her that… and we will sit on the patio with our coffee and cigars.

Our plan for the day is to see a movie. We discussed picking up some almonds to munch on but unless she mentions it again, I am not going to. I think I might have been pushing her to do that, and I do not want to impede her progress. She is doing so well, and I will not be the reason she falters… certainly not with all of the love and support she has shown me during this long, strange, and often tumultuous trip. I am thinking of preparing our evening meal replacements as a fine candlelit dinner on the balcony. We’ll see if I can manage it. Otherwise, we will just enjoy our last full day together. She flies home tomorrow, and that is hard for both of us.

Have a great day folks!