Losing a part of me

Category: Plans

  • Day 835

    I woke up this morning with a bit of sadness in my heart, but not because the bathroom scale showed my weight up by .2 lb.. I was sad because after breakfast I would be packing my carry-on bag and then Leslie and her son would be driving me to the airport, which is where I am currently sitting waiting for my flight.

    It has been a wonderful three weeks with my wife, despite the stress caused by the invasive species criminal tw@t who invaded her home and planted her flag, knowing the laws in Texas would protect her until we got a court order to have her removed. I teach my students that social engineers prey on three emotions to succeed: sympathy/our desire to be good, pressure/urgency, and fear/threats. This loser used all three of these tactics on Leslie, and when I finally got involved, she was already onto the threats/fear stage… and figured that the tactics that worked against my wife (and which would work against most people) would work against me. Boy, did she misread her audience on that one. Some people do not scare easily… others just don’t scare. I fit into that last category.

    With all that, it was a stressful couple of weeks… but happy times too. My wife and I had not been having the best time for the last few months, and we’re happily reconciled. Now if we could only live in the same country, that would be great.

    With the exception of one really bad night, I have had an excellent sleep score for the last ten days. Well, that is my word… Garmin considers anything above 80 to be good, and only scores over 90 are rated as excellent. As someone who has traditionally had trouble sleeping the night, I am going to consider every score above 75 to be excellent… so the last ten days have been great. Yes, there were a couple of really hard nights, but I made up for them when I could.

    I am thrilled that I got out for two good walk/jog outings while I was in Dallas, and hope that I will be able to continue that when I get back to Canada. Yes, there will be rainy days when I might opt to use the treadmill, but knowing that spring is here and the cold and snow and ice are behind us is a great motivator to get out and to get moving again! With that said, I need to cancel my gym membership. Crap.

    My weight is up from my best weight of the trip, but it is still down from the day before I left Canada. Now that I will be home and not worried about eating out, I should be able to get back in control of my weight loss. I have had a lot of emotional stresses in my life these last six months, and the numbers on the bathroom scale reflect that. Now it is time for me to pick myself up by my bootstraps and to get back to my best weight ever. That will take a few months I am sure, but it will happen.

    I have an hour and a half before my flight leaves, and I am sitting in the same French café that I ate at the first time I flew out of Dallas. Despite having an omelette for breakfast this morning, I ordered a muffin with my coffee. I do not know if they are serving food on the airplane or not (yes, I know I would have to pay for it) so I will pick up a snack to eat en route, just in case. When I get home I will check my food stocks, and then I will go to the supermarket to pick up whatever I might be missing. Also, I have to make sure everything is just right for Her Royal Floofness to return to her palace – she has spent three weeks away, and she will expect a royal welcome! I will see to it that there are plenty of treats and scritchies and lovies for her when she gets home!

    Okay, I suppose I will sign off and get ready to fly. I will check out the duty free shop and see if there is a bottle that I really need. I will then find my gate and sit there to wait for boarding, at which point I will try to sleep a little bit.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 830

    My weight this morning was back up to exactly 280 lbs., and I am not at all sorry for it. Yesterday’s dinner was absolutely delicious. Leslie prepared an amazing piece of lamb with garlic and wine which was to die for. She says that she had never prepared lamb before… Somewhat sus!! In any event, we enjoyed it tremendously, and then shared a bottle of wine with our cigar on the balcony. I have been drinking somewhat more alcohol these past couple of weeks than I normally do but I think I can be forgiven… given all that has happened. I might even write about it one day; it would make an interesting read.

    Other than the wine, I do not think I ate badly yesterday. Yes, we enjoyed a piece of chocolate-covered matzah, and yes, the matzah brei for breakfast is a bit indulgent… but it could have been worse. I know that my five-day streak of losing weight is broken, but I will get back on track today. I will eat smart and in moderation.

    Tomorrow is not only the last day of Passover, but it is also our wedding anniversary! It is actually our second first anniversary, and if that sounds convoluted then let me assure you that it is, but we have planned for it. You see, we got married in a courthouse on June 24, 2022, so our first wedding anniversary for the civil ceremony was last June. We got married in a religious service on April 30, 2023, and so tomorrow is our first wedding anniversary for that one. We decided last year that we were going to celebrate our civil anniversary just one time… and from then on we would commemorate only April 30 as our actual wedding anniversary. To celebrate, we are going to have an indulgent meal, which will also have the benefit of it being our first post-Passover meal so we can have leavened foods. While I always enjoy my Passover foods (maybe more so this year, with the goodies that Leslie bought, and with my finally figuring out how to make a good charoset and matzah brei), I would be lying if I said that I would not mind biting into a nice dinner roll. Tomorrow evening I shall!

    I know… I just wrote a couple of paragraphs ago that I need to stay mindful of what I eat. I will be… but our wedding anniversary is special, especially knowing all that we have survive this past year.

    As for today? I roasted a chicken this morning that will serve to provide meat for our chicken salad, and also we will have a dinner of roasted chicken with sauteed mushrooms. I will probably take the night off from drinking – we shared a bottle of wine Friday, Saturday, and Sunday… in addition to the wine for the Passover seder Thursday evening. Add to that, there was a shot of whisky when I found out that Princess Sophie had gone out for a stroll without telling anyone, and that adds up to a lot of alcohol over a four night period… especially for someone who hardly drinks at all.

    I will be spending the afternoon at the cigar lounge. I am meeting with a friend that I’ve known on Facebook for a couple of years, and every once in a while, we connect in Dallas for a cigar. That will be today! I am teaching from 5-8pm, and then Leslie and I will have our dinner and then a cigar on the balcony. It is so good to be able to spend time with her… especially after all of the hardships that our marriage has faced these past few months. I am comfortable saying that I think we are past all of that, and we are back to being a happily married couple… who have to live in different countries until the paperwork is completed (and boy is there a lot of paperwork!).

    Yesterday the weather was not great, but today we are looking at hot and sunny… at least, it is what we Canadians call hot. Today’s high of 83º (and tomorrow and Wednesday logging 87º each day) means that we will be sleeping with the air conditioner going, in addition to the fans. This weather does not bother me one bit, but I know that when I get to the lounge there will be people complaining about the heat. You can’t please everyone, right?

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 800

    I had a great day yesterday but for whatever reason I did not sit down to write. Oops.

    I continue to sleep very little but am not at all tired throughout the day. That might have something to do with how much coffee I drink when I am here… or it might just be because of the air. Either way, I am relaxed and happy on four or five hours per night.

    My fitness watch battery is at 5% and I will be happy if it makes it through one more day. If not, then I will have a couple of days without measurements in the app… but I will still be walking and aiming for 15,000 steps per day. I will continue to eat smartly. I am still hoping to be very happy with my weight when I step onto the bathroom scale Wednesday morning. As it is, the Hawaiian shirt that I could not wear Monday seems to be a bit more comfortable today. I promised someone I would send them a picture of myself in it, which I was able to do this morning, so I see that as an indicator that I’m doing well. The scale will tell the numbers, but more importantly the way my shirts and sports jackets fit is more important.

    I am meeting my steps goal every day without a problem. As was the case on my last visit here, the only vehicles I have been in are taxis to and from the Hotel Nacional with friends. To be honest, I did take a cab back alone that night, but it was late and I wanted to see a friend before their shift ended. I made up for it by walking another few thousand steps before turning in.

    It is amazing how many Jews I have met on this trip, which is to say that I have met at least six of them… including one native Cubans who is with the local Chabad house. I confess it never occurred to me that there would be one! Last night at dinner the guys at the next table were from Tel Aviv and we had a great conversation. They asked me why I wear my kippa here instead of a hat. I told them that had I been wearing a hat then I would never have met most of the Jews that I have met. Havana is a very safe city and Cuba is very accepting of all religions (while not condoning any one of them), but if someone does not like the fact that I am Jewish (and Israeli) then I like knowing… and if they confront me then I’ll happily handle that situation. In the meantime, I was able to light my Shabbat candles in my apartment last night. I was alone, but as I lit them I know that I was with all of the people I pray for, and with the whole Jewish nation. There is n irony to being able to do this freely in a country that is so poor and the people are oppressed… just like we have been so many times.

    It is another gorgeous day and I am enjoying my second day cup of coffee at my buddy‘s bistro. In a little while I will head out for my day. I have to stop by my apartment because I took my laptop bag to bring him some things, and do not want to have to carry it all day. I will then set out to enjoy the rest of my day. It is the Sabbath, and I will take it easy… but if that were the only definition of the day then this entire week has been Sabbath!

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 792

    My weight dropped this morning, but not below the dreaded mark. I will keep trying. I just finished working for the week, and I have to run to the bank to exchange money. After that, I have a few things to do around the house, and I have to take Her Royal Floofness for her walk. I do not think it will be a long walk at the snow has been coming down all day, but I am going to give her that opportunity. After that… dinner, and then I have a video chat. Hopefully the snow will still allow me to smoke on the balcony… even if I need to light the heater.

  • Day 791

    I was on my way down the rabbit hole last night when I got another message… this time I responded. I have no idea where this is going to go, but for now there was a positive conversation in which we discussed the root cause of a lot of our issues… and in which we clarified that I did not have sex when I was in Cuba. Where do we go from here? Another conversation I suppose… and then another. We will see where it leads. 

    My weight jumped a pound this morning, and is back above 280 lbs. again. This is the last time I will write that. I am done gaining weight. I am redoubling my weight loss efforts effective today. I am not buying any more bread or yogurt or breakfast cereals or anything else that might be hampering my progress. Yes, I have gained forty pounds back since the beginning of November. Whatever might happen with anyone else… that ends now. It is time for me to pick myself up by my bootstraps and reclaim the ground that I have lost. 

    Have a great day folks. 

  • Day 787

    I was much better yesterday than I have been in a couple of weeks. I had my regular breakfast of an omelette, then lunch and dinner were both seasoned chicken prepared in the air fryer. Lunch was eaten with a side salad, dinner with a salad and rice. In addition to that, I walked to the bank and back – a 6.5km jaunt (at a decent pace) which contributed to my highest step-count day since I was in Cuba (14,400 steps). All in all, I was quite pleased with that. I would have been more pleased if the bathroom scale had given me back more than the 1.2 lbs. that I lost this morning from yesterday’s ridiculous gain.

    My plans for today include trying to stay on track as I visit with friends to smoke cigars. It is St. Patrick’s Day so I have to assume there will be some sort of festive food offered to me. I will try to summon the willpower to resist.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 778

    I faltered toward the end of the day yesterday, otherwise my weight would have been down. As it is, I did not gain or lose. I can live with that. Today is going to be a busy day, and I am just hoping to get through some stressful stuff in the early part of the day before I can coast through a lovely evening with friends in Toronto.

  • Day 770

    Yesterday did not go as planned once again. I suppose the big wrecker was that I went to Hamilton to the tailor, only to find out that my appointment is today and not yesterday… even though they sent me an email telling me it was yesterday. I came home and prepared a piece of fish and some rice… and then I had a roll with avocado butter and jam. Added to the fact that I ate so much, I ate it all late. I did not expect any better that I got when I stepped onto the bathroom scale this morning… my weight was up a full pound.

    This morning, I had to run out to be at the notary’s office at 8:30am so that I would be back at my desk in time to teach. I am not happy about the documents that I am having notarized (and there will be another one in the next couple of weeks) but I am not ready to discuss it… at least, not here. Maybe in a few days, or weeks… we’ll see. My regular readers can read into the fact that I have not been discussing my wife or my marriage for a few months.

    This evening, I will prepare a light dinner, and then I will head out to my appointment. I will not make a stink about it, but I am a little miffed that I ran out to be there on time, paid for parking, and waited 45 minutes before realizing they were not coming. Yes, it was their mistake. No, I am not going to do anything about it. Mistakes happen. I will go in and pick out a few new shirts… and maybe a sports jacket. Whatever happens, I will not overeat again!

    Okay, it is time for me to start teaching for the day. See you all tomorrow!

  • Day 765

    I am still not feeling 100%, but I know I have been doing the right thing by resting and staying close to home. I have been invited to a herf to smoke cigars with some friends this evening but I am going to stay home. It is not only that I should be coming down from the massive amount of cigars I smoked while in Cuba, but also because I simply need to allow myself the time to get better. I am going to run out to the store for a little while because I need some supplies, but other than that I have no reason to not relax and recuperate.

    I will eat normally today, and I will make sure I have done everything that I need to prepare for the class that I am delivering this week. Microsoft Learn has made it a lot more complicated to download courseware over the last couple of years. Fortunately, I was able to figure it out, and I will spend some time reading the newest version of the course to make sure there are no surprises waiting for me… and for my students.

    Okay, I guess I should get my day going… I will run to the store to pick up the few items that I need, and then I will come home to prepare lunch.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 761

    After missing the mark (only by one measure) the previous day, I shot through my fitness watch’s steps goal yesterday, surpassing 20,000 steps for the second time in a week, and for the third time since I got to Cuba. With that said, the soles of my feet are feeling it a bit today. It is nothing like it was a week ago, but I am still going to take care to not overdo it too badly today. The goal on the watch is 17,420; I will not force myself, but expect if I do not surpass that, I will still come close.

    I have not been eating entirely smart, but I still expect that I will not have gained weight during this trip. I know the pair of shorts that I am wearing today felt much tighter last Sunday when I first put them on, but that could be all in my mind. In 48-hours I will know for sure when I step onto the scale Thursday morning.

    As I had planned, I did my cigar shopping yesterday. While the selection is abysmal, I still found a couple of very good boxes of cigars to take home with me. I am not disappointed! What did disappoint me was that the Partagas store (behind the Capitolo) was closed. I am told that it is going to be reopened and that they are simply rebuilding it. The store certainly did look like a construction site when I walked by, so that is certainly plausible. In the meantime, for my second trip in a row I ended up at the La Casa del Habanos in Plaza De Armas. L found two boxes with a lot of age on them which is rare and difficult. A good cigar gets better with age which is why I have a few boxes in my humidor at home that have been there for a couple of years. The two boxes that I am bringing back are from 2017 and 2018 respectively, meaning they are absolutely ready to smoke right now. I am excited to crack them open, although I will not be doing that to smoke them in the winter… they will either wait until spring, or else for a day when I am invited to a friend’s indoor lounge.

    What else did I do yesterday? I took my laundry in to be washed, lest I find myself out of socks and underwear. I took them in early in the day hoping they would be ready in the afternoon, but because of a misunderstanding (on my part) they needed to dry overnight. I am never inflexible in Cuba, but I did need to take one pair of socks which I took home straight away and hung from my fan so that I could wear them today. Owing to the damage I did to my feet on my first day, this is my first Cuba trip ever that I have run out of socks. My sandals have stayed in the room the entire time! In a bizarre twist, it is also my first Cuba trip that when I packed my suitcase, I only packed the socks that I thought I would need for working out, hence the need to do laundry. It is not the worst thing – I will have much fewer clothes to wash when I get back to Canada. I spent some time talking with the tourist friends I met who were going home yesterday, exchanging contact information so we can stay in touch. I had dinner with a friend who reminded me of the truth of what I call Cuban Standard Time, which is to say that she was ninety minutes late. No matter, that gave me ninety minutes to people-watch in Parque Central.

    We had old clothes for dinner! Okay, that needs some clarification: One of the most popular Cuban meals is called ropa viella, which is really shredded beef. It was delicious! We ate at a restaurant a minute or two from the Capitolo called Paladar Kilometro Zero – all of Cuba is measured in distance from the capital, and that is where it starts. The food was amazing and the musicians were fabulous, playing instrumental Cubanized versions of many American and European standards. I always appreciate a good saxophone, and this guy could play!

    After I dropped her off, I met a couple in the bar across the street from her who were speaking English. They are a married couple, he from New York and she is local. She is a tour guide, and we had a great conversation. As has happened several times this trip, I offered them a cigar and they insisted on buying me a drink. I eventually walked back to my buddy’s cafe and ended the evening there.

    My plans for today are very simple and uncluttered. I have two oligations: I have to collect my laundry, and I am having lunch with Johnny. After that…? I dunno. Until then? I dunno. I am going to walk back to my apartment to drop my computer off, and then I will likely walk around the old city for a few hours. Oh, and I am sure that throughout the day I will drop in on a couple of friends where they work to say hello.

    I am both pleased and shocked by how advanced my Spanish has been. Five years ago (or even two!) I was breaking my teeth to understand and to be understood… and I would avoid being alone for any length of time with people who did not understand English. This past week I have spent many hours with several individuals and groups who did not speak any English, or if they did, I did not trouble them with it. Yes, functioning entirely in Spanish is a bit tiring for me, but I did not realize until the past couple of days how it (my Spanish) has advanced. I am really happy about that, and will continue to work on it.

    As for food… I will continue to be mostly good, without restricting myself. I will continue to eat and drink moderately, and I will get a lot of steps in (without overdoing it). If my weight on Thursday is exactly what it was the morning I left Canada then I will be extremely happy, but I am prepared to be as much as 3-4 pounds heavier without getting too down about it. Whether or not that happens, I will be back on the treadmill by the weekend.

    Have a great day folks!