Losing a part of me

Author: Mitch Garvis

  • Day 456

    Falling off the wagon can hurt a lot worse than it has these last few days. It is time to admit though that if I did not quite fall off, then I have not exactly been steadily on the wagon either. I cheated (some wrong foods, but all wrong portions) Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. The only bright light is that I have still remained active. I jogged all of those days except yesterday, and even yesterday I got in my steps. I slipped for sure, and it sucks that I am more than five pounds heavier than I was Friday morning. Had I not jogged (or walked) it would have been much worse.

    You know something, that is not entirely true. Another reason I did not fall of worse is because I have stayed mostly mindful, even in my cheating. Yes, my portion sizes of chicken and salmon were too damned big… but they were still healthy proteins, no sauces. Yes, I bought a couple of bags of mini crisps which are bad for my weight loss… but I did not buy the Ruffles potato chips that would have been much worse (not to mention also come in much larger bags, which would have been just as empty when I was done with them). Over these few days I have bought both peanuts and almonds from Bulk Barn… but they have been very reasonable quantities each time. My second worst cheat was yesterday when I found a bag of almonds in my pantry yesterday (which should not have been there) which I opened and finished… again, it was a terrible cheat, but they were finished by 5:30pm, and I skipped two meal replacements in the evening to counterbalance that. Frankly, my worst cheat (and the one that bit me hardest) was the smoked turkey drumstick that I bought and devoured Tuesday. Had it been roasted turkey then the only problem would have been the portion size (which could easily have been three meals). According to sources, the 27g of fat also has 2,800mg of sodium.

    My goal for today is to get back onto the wagon. I plan to head for the gym around 11:45 for a good run on the treadmill. My gym is only a few blocks from the train station, where I have to pick up my cleaning lady at 2pm, and if I time things right then I don’t have to make the round trip twice. On my way there I will drop some shirts off at the dry cleaners, which I should have done yesterday had I thought of it. Yes, my new shirts are due to arrive on Monday, but that does not mean my old shirts are going in the garbage. As long as I do not make any pit stops to buy snacks along the way, I will be fine. Unfortunately, the gym is two blocks from Bulk Barn, my dry cleaner is attached to Fortino’s, and the cleaning lady and I need to hop into Wal-Mart to pick up some supplies. I suppose it will be a good test of my willpower.

    This evening, Leslie and I are sitting down (virtually) with the Rabbi to go over the details of our wedding. While it is exciting, it is also stressful. I also have to make a number of calls today and tomorrow about the logistics; If it were not for the time zone differential it would be slightly less stressful for me, but there it is. I am extremely excited about the wedding, and this morning I went downstairs to my storage locker to bring up my garment bag suitcase; While my regular suitcase has a compartment for hanging shirts and a suit, I have long suspected that for this trip I would be better suited (no pun intended) with the luggage designed for that purpose.

    Leslie made a great point this morning… I need special fun socks for the wedding! We went through some options online and picked out the perfect pair. One more job that I had almost neglected is now done!

    My plan for today is to get through it without any cheats. I will hit the treadmill at the gym, followed by a hydro massage and then shower, sauna, shower. My cleaning lady will be here in the afternoon, and while she is here, I will make some of my calls about the logistics. If the weather cooperates, I might also have a cigar on the balcony while she is here. Following the call with the rabbi, I will head to Taekwondo, where I will likely take it easy because of my elbow, which is still in a lot of pain (although much less so for the Aspirin). If I can get all of this done, plus my errands, then I know that when I step onto the bathroom scale tomorrow morning, I will weigh less than I did today.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 455

    I have not been talking about my elbow because I have thought every day for the last couple of weeks that it was just because I slept badly on it, and that it would get better on its own. Yesterday evening at Taekwondo, I realized how much it is really hurting; this morning, I could hardly use my right arm. I took Aspirin and an anti-inflammatory and will baby it for a few days. If I do not feel any improvement by tomorrow morning, then I will go to the clinic and have it looked at. If nothing else, I only have one anti-inflammatory left, and I will need a new prescription if the issue persists.

    Because of the weather, I worked out at the gym yesterday. I did not take the time to recalibrate my fitness watch or my iPhone app, so both of them recorded strangely weird totals. According to the treadmill, I walked 3.2 miles, which translates to slightly over 5km. While that alone was not enough to reach my daily steps goal, I would do so within the next hour, and by doing a lot of jogging in place while waiting in line for my turn during two consecutive Taekwondo classes, I would shatter the goal by nearly 7,000 steps. After bringing Her Floofness for her morning walk, I needed only register another 6,300 steps today to extend my streak to ten, tying my best streak ever. While waiting for my tyre and oil change, I decided to go for a walk around the buildings. It was not a power walk by any means – I was even smoking a cigar as I went, but by the time my car was ready I had registered a 4.15km walk, and I have officially tied my previous streak. I do not know if I will run this afternoon or not – that will depend on a couple of factors – but it doesn’t matter… by the end of the day I will have reached my 10,000 steps, even if that is just from taking the dogs out for a couple of walks. Yes, I said dogs… Charlie’s mom asked if I wouldn’t mind, and of course I do not. Tomorrow I will be jogging,

    I am still off the program. Yesterday I bought a smoked turkey leg which I enjoyed for dinner. I was not thinking about how much salt there is in a turkey leg, but after dinner when I realized how much water I was drinking I knew what was going on. I also knew that this morning I would be grossed out by the numbers on the bathroom scale. I also knew that it would be temporary. I cheated again today, but not nearly as bad. I made some salmon and rice for lunch, this time not completely destroying the rice. I will continue on a partial program for the day and will see how I am feeling tomorrow. The rest of my food intake today should be meal replacements only. We’ll see.

    I am really excited that I received notification from DHL when I woke up that my new clothes will be delivered Monday, which means that I will be able to bring them with me to Dallas and California with me. That does not change the fact that this afternoon I have an appointment with a tailor to have my suit taken in.

    I went to the tailor to discover that while my suit does need to be dry cleaned, it does not need to be altered. That is a relief, and I dropped it off at the dry cleaner. I also left with the tailor two pair of pants and my vest to have them taken in. It will be nice to get a few more months out of those.

    I guess the day has gotten away from me, but I did have a cigar on the patio, and am in front of my computer in time to publish this article before I start my class.

    Have a great day folk!

  • Day 454

    Today is Yom HaShoah. It is the day every year that Jews set aside to remember the Holocaust. Perhaps it would be more accurate to write commemorate, as for most of us – at least those of my generation – seldom does a day pass when we do not remember it. There are reminders everywhere if you know what to look for. If that makes it sound like we are all wallowing in misery, let me clarify; it is vital that we remember because if we do not, and if we do not teach our children about it, then it is bound to happen again. I have stories that I will not share here of encounters with survivors. I remember meeting them as a child, as a soldier. So many encounters with so many incredible people who, when I was lucky enough, would share their stories with me. More than one of those stories changed my life. It has been seventy-eight years since the camps were liberated; the survivors who are still with us are octogenarians (and nonagenarians). They have seen so much, but one day they will all be gone, and it will be my generation’s responsibility to continue to share their stories. We must never forget.

    Sometimes you fall off the wagon, and getting back on track is painful and grueling. I spent three days off my program (although still jogging), and I was determined to get back onto it yesterday. As I said I would, I walked the kilometre to the post office to ship my package. I also bought a bundle of pocket tissues because it was raining, and I could already feel my nose dripping. As I walked out of the pharmacy, I started my run. I honestly did not know how far I would be able to go and did not set out with any particular course in mind. I wanted to extend my current streak of hitting my steps goal, and the fact that it was raining a little would not stop me. That I felt a weird and nagging ache in my hip would not stop me, as long as I stayed true to my self-promise that I would listen to my body. I had almost arrived at Guelph Line, but rather than crossing the shopping centre parking lot and then the thoroughfare, I turned down onto the walking/biking path (which would take me to that same street in a few moments anyways). I crossed Guelph Line, staying with the off-road paved path. I knew there were several streets onto which I could turn up when I realized I was running out of steam. I was not entirely sure where the path ultimately led, but I was sure I would not find out on this outing.

    Something strange happened on my run yesterday. I have jogged over 5km something like 30 times in the last couple of months, whether on the streets or treadmill. Every time I do, I pull up for a break for just a minute or two every couple of kilometres, sometimes every kilometre. At a certain point I realized the walking/biking path was coming to an end. I saw Costco in the distance, and tried to reconcile where exactly that was. Oh, right… North Service Road near the corner of Brant Street, which means the path had curved down a bit. Okay, should I stop? No, not yet. It’s still raining a bit… maybe I’ll pop into a store and get dry for a moment? I know I don’t have my Costco membership card with me, and anyways if I turn up Brant then maybe I will stop into one of the stores at the corner of Mount Royal. What happens if I stop, and my hip locks up? I would have to take an Uber home, and that is not what I want to do. Maybe I’ll just keep going for another kilometre. We’ll see.

    The only time I paused my trackers during the entire outing yesterday was when I was stopped at a red light at the corner of Guelph Line (on the return trip). I peaked down and I was 7.5km into my run. I was stopped for fifteen seconds. I realized at a certain point that it might have been my first jog over 5km during which I did not stop to rest. If I can keep that up, then who knows? Maybe there is hope for me yet!

    Jogging

    • Distance: 10.08km (5.18km)
    • Duration: 1:18:17 (39:58)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m46s (7m43s)
    • Steps: 12,150 (6,120)
    • Calories burned: 1,200 (600)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 155 (153)

    I should also note that my per-kilometre pace was below 8m0s for every kilometre except one; for reasons likely pertaining to wind and elevation, the seventh kilometre was clocked at 8m03s.

    Where does this leave me in my challenges? When I checked yesterday after coming in I was ranked 22,154 (of 144,259 participants), in the top 15.36%. Oddly enough, in my age and gender bracket I am not even cracking the top 25%… I stand 3,395 of 13,167 participants, only good for the top 25.78%. I do not know who the leaders are, but the leader is averaging nearly 40km per day, which leads me to believe that something might be rotten in the state of Denmark. I honestly don’t care though… If I complete the challenge then I am equally eligible for the prizes as he is, as they are drawn at random from everyone who completed the challenge.

    I have to admit, between the killer jog, my staying true to the program (for the first time since Thursday), and a really good bowel movement this morning, I was a bit disappointed that the numbers on the bathroom scale did not drop a little more than they did. .2 lb. is really just a statistical blip. No matter, it will come… I just have to prove to my body that I am serious about not cheating. My only aberration from the program yesterday was a cup of Japanese milk tea, which I needed because my throat would not have made it through the last hour of my lecture last night.

    We always say that if you don’t like the weather in Canada, just wait a few minutes. As Her Floofness and I walked this morning in the near-freezing temperatures, more than one fellow fur-parent expressed their shock at the drop in temperature. I reminded them that last week was the anomaly, and that this is the norm for mid-April. That does not change the fact that all of us long for a speedy return to the high-20s, but that is not normal for this time of year. With a high temperature forecast as a windy 5°, I decided early that today will be a day to work out in shorts and a t-shirt… at the gym, followed by a hydro massage and a stint in the sauna. After all, what am I paying them for if I am not going to use the facilities, right?

    I cannot lollygag around on the computer for a few hours before finally changing into my workout kit today as I did yesterday. I have to be at my therapist’s office in Oakville for 1:30pm, which means that I will try to remember to bring my meal replacement with me to the gym so that I do not face the same quandary I did three weeks ago when I scrambled to pick up peanuts in my mad dash from the gym to the therapist and then to my barber. If I get to the gym by 10:30am then I should be able to get through a leisurely workout and then post-workout routine in time to leave and drive unrushed to her office. My buddy Eduardo might be coming over for a cigar later, which will be nice despite the unpleasant weather. We have not seen each other in a few weeks, and he just returned from Cuba with some goodies for me. I am unsure of what he brought, but if there is a box worthy of the occasion, I am still undecided on which cigars to hand out to guests at the wedding. He might just have the answer for me when he comes over this afternoon!

    This evening I will be in the dojang. I am so happy to be back at Taekwondo and wish that I had the freedom to do it more than twice per week. We must always be patient, especially when we are studying an art in which the mental aspect of patience and calm are so important. I also know that in mid-May I am starting a new teaching contract that will have me teaching the two evenings when I am usually able to go to the dojang, and that will continue through mid-July. I will be speaking with the Master to ask him if there might be some accommodation that can be made for me to train outside the hours of the adult/Black Belt classes… after all, I should not need anything other than the gym. If that is not possible, then I could also use one of the studios at my gym for the same purpose – after all, didn’t I write just two paragraphs ago that I should be using the facilities as long as I am paying for them? Maybe I will speak with the gym manager today to ask if that would be alright. I cannot imagine it would be an issue.

    I found out this morning that a close friend is in the hospital, and I am worried. I spoke with his wife, and she assured me that it was not a heart attack, but the doctors still need to run some more tests to figure out what is going on. In the meantime, my buddy is nearly thirteen years my junior, but I have thought on several occasions that he is working himself into an early grave. I have one more person to pray for today. Four, actually… I will pray for his wife and my godchildren as well (although I always do, but not with the specificity I will today). This is just one more reason why I am glad that I am getting myself into better shape and taking care of my health. I do not want Leslie to have to call an ambulance for me because I am on the floor clutching my chest.

    Okay, it is time to get moving. Today will be my second day true to the program, although if I need to grab something, it will be a very small handful of nuts. With a morning workout and an evening Taekwondo class I would not begrudge myself that if it is needed. Tomorrow through Friday I might be able to jog outside, although Friday through Sunday they are predicting rain. We’ll see. Today is a gym day for sure.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 453

    I am not sure why I was unable to stay on my program for the last three days. I am just glad that my dedication to staying active, to jogging and when I can’t jog anymore then to walking, has stopped me gaining more weight than I did. Despite falling off my program these last three days, I am still just over 3 lbs. up from my best weight ever (recorded Friday). Knowing what I ate Friday and Saturday and Sunday, it would have been much worse had I cheated and not stayed active.

    I wrote yesterday about my streaks, and sure enough I was able to continue to creep toward my best ever walking streak, which was a 10-day period that I spent in Havana leading up to the pandemic. Yesterday was my seventh day meeting my steps target (which Garmin has set at 8,560 steps per day), and I plan to keep going all week. The thing is, when I set that streak in 2020, Garmin had my step goal set much lower (under 5,000 steps per day). I know that while I need three more days to tie and then break that personal record according to the app, I have already crushed it, with just over 115,500 steps in that seven-day period. The Garmin app does acknowledge that last week is in fact my record for most steps in a week since I have been using it (dating to September 24, 2019). My most steps in a month was in July 2020 when I was living in California and doing a lot of walking, both with my dog and for exercise. As of this writing I am seventeen days into the month of April and I am not quite halfway there… but if you take into account that I spent a week in Dallas not exercising, I am not doing too bad. I would have to average slightly over 14,000 steps per day every day until the end of the month to beat that record. Considering my daily average over the last week is 16,400, I have a pretty good chance of hitting it… as long as I stay on track! (I should also remember that the last three days of the month I will be traveling with Leslie, culminating in our wedding on April 30! If it comes down to the wire, I will probably miss it by a few steps. Those three days I will have much more important things to worry about than my steps goals.)

    While I did not end up keeping my pledge to myself yesterday to get back on track on my full-fast program, I did jog. After Saturday’s record-breaking outing I decided I needed to take it easy yesterday, so just shy of 5.2km I pulled up and walked the rest of the way. I was happy to hit that, and with the 2.35km walk that followed, I still got 7.5km in before hitting the showers.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 5.18km (15.01km)
    • Duration: 39:58 (1:59:05)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m43s (7m56s)
    • Steps: 6,120 (17,850)
    • Calories burned: 600 (1,850)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 153 (150)

    I have mentioned a few times that I am using some of the challenges (both on Garmin and on MapMyFitness.com) to inspire me to push myself. On the 1,023 in 2023 challenge on MapMyFitness I am poised to crack the top 16% of participants today. That challenge gives interim badges, with my next one (400km) less than 60km away. I really feel that I am doing well, although I am also motivated by the tremendous weight loss I have enjoyed, and the great shape my legs are in!

    There are quite a few more challenges on the Garmin app than on MMF. Some of these are simply automated challenges from Garmin, which awards points and badges for each one achieved. Others are challenges created by other members who challenge each other, and we use them to either motivate themselves or others, or else they like to compete and look good. I never expect to win the challenges versus others, but there are occasionally good conversations in the groups. As such, I posted the following in one of them this morning:

    Well, I’ll not be competing to win this challenge, but I do not consider myself in competition with anyone but myself. My ‘Most Steps in a Day’ was October 1 when my wife and I took our stepson to Disneyland. My most steps in a month was in July, 2020… the last time I was really on a good weight-loss journey. My most steps in a week was the week that ended yesterday, and I plan to break that record this week. Thanks for the motivation, folks! I don’t care that I sit in 45th place… I want to be the #1 me that I can be!

    When I see people in these challenges logging 200,000 steps in a week, I know that I am not nearly able to compete with that, but they do motivate me to do better sometimes. There is one weekly steps challenge that I participated in for the week that ended last night, and while I was 22nd overall, it is nice to know that fewer than 10,000 steps separated me from 16th place… and that 75 people finished behind me. While there is so often too much chatter in some of these challenges, and I will leave the ones that are too disturbing (my watch vibrates with every message), I still enjoy the ones that I am in… even though I seldom win.

    I will mention that my list of accomplishment badges keeps improving, with nearly seventy badges already earned – six for running, five for steps, twenty for challenges. They really mean nothing outside of the Garmin Connect world, but when I see that one is within my reach I will push myself a little harder to earn it… such as the 100k steps badge for the first two weeks of April, my 15km run activity for April, and my 300k steps in March badge (which was earned by pushing myself just a little bit harder on March 31). They mean nothing after they are earned, but they mean a lot when they get me to push myself just that little bit harder.

    I made a decision to have my suit altered, so I made an appointment for Wednesday afternoon (knowing I need it back by the following Wednesday). I want to look perfect in our wedding pictures, and I do not think that having my belt so tight as to cut off circulation in order for my pants to not fall down is quite the look I am going for… nor the creased beltline of the pants that causes.

    I have done a bit of lollygagging this morning as I tried to get through this article, but it is time for me to publish and get going. My plan for the day is to stay on track! I have a package that I have to ship today, so when I am finished, I will change into my running kit, take the box and walk to the post office (which is actually in the pharmacy), and when I am done there then I will jog for an hour or so. When I get home, I will vow to stay on track. I have a few calls I have to make about the wedding today. After that, I am teaching this evening, but if all goes well, I should still have time for a cigar on the balcony before I teach.

    The weather has turned, and while it is not hard, it looks like I will be jogging in a light rain. I thought briefly about going to the gym instead, but then I remembered that I am a hearty Canadian with the right gear and the right attitude. I will have my meal replacement after my shower, which I know will be a bit late, but will not be the end of the world. In the meantime, I will get out there and I will get my 10,000 steps in… whatever the weather.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 452

    Today is the day that I break my previous streak. As soon as I pressed the publish button to send my journal entry to my blog yesterday, I received notification that I was on a 225-day streak. That means that when I do the same today, I will now be on the longest streak since starting on this journey, 452 days ago. It is appropriate then that when I get home from my jog later today that I will hit a seven-day streak on meeting my steps goal (according to my Garmin fitness watch). My longest streak on that is ten days, so if I jog (or walk) every day between now and then, I could break that streak on Thursday. I believe that my best streak this year is eight days, which culminated by recording 10,000 steps on April 2, many of which would have been while moving and shaking at the Taylor Swift concert. I would like to set a new best streak record this week… especially knowing that when I set that ten-day streak, my steps total goal was less than 5,000. For the past few months, Garmin has set it at 8,560… but this streak I have made sure to exceed 10,000 steps every day (with a high of 22,950 yesterday and 21,800 steps on Tuesday, and two other days exceeding 17,000 steps).

    I was reticent about my jog yesterday before I headed out only because the previous day (Friday) had been such a disaster. I was not out to prove anything, I just wanted to do my best. As long as I was able to get back up to what I had previously thought of as my minimum distance (5km) then I would be satisfied. Let me tell you, I blew that out of the water. I was about .5km from home when my tracker told me I was at 11.5km, and I was out of water. If I turned the corner onto Walker’s Line, then I would be home and hydrated in less than five minutes. I decided to pull up and walk, knowing that I would get to the pharmacy in under 1km. I have been telling myself (and writing herein) that the Garmin Connect app has a badge for a 15km jog, and this was my chance to earn it. I slowed to a walk until I got to the pharmacy, and paused my trackers while I went in. Disappointed they did not have a sugar-free energy drink, I bought a bottle of water which I poured into my empty container. I continued my journey (restarting my trackers as I left the store), and when my distance read 13km I started jogging again. Following the path that I chose it would be precisely two more kilometres to home. I took several short breaks over the 15km jog (really 13.5/1.5), but I did it. I got home and felt amazing!

    Jogging

    • pb Distance: 15.01km (6.23km)
    • pb Duration: 1:59:05 (47:51)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m56s (7m40s)
    • pb Steps: 17,850 (7,500)
    • pb Calories burned: 1,850 (633)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 150 (156)

    It is nice to note that for the running portion of my outing (that is, excluding the 1.5 km walked) I did not exceed 7m53s for any kilometre, and my average time was 7m34s. It is also nice to realize that when I arrived home, I did not feel the need to collapse into my bed (or onto the floor). I took a much-needed shower, and then I got dressed, made my meal replacement, collected some cigars, and headed out to Cambridge to see Ryan and the boys.

    I did cheat yesterday, which is probably why the numbers on the bathroom scale were down .8 lb. and not more. I’m okay with that, I did not expect to lose all of the weight I gained in my previous day all at once. I had some peanuts in the car while driving to Cambridge, and when I was there, I broke down and ate a couple of kebabs. While they were primarily protein, one of them had a very sweet sauce which means a lot of sugar. Oh well. Hopefully today I will be able to stay on track. When I am done writing I will head out for my jog, but it will not be like yesterday, I can promise you that! My Body Battery was 80 when I took Her Floofness out this morning, and it is still 73 now. That does not mean that I need to push myself to the brink every day. I will probably do 8-10km.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 451

    Yesterday was not a good day for my weight loss journey. There is a measurement on my new fitness watch called ‘Body Battery.’ It is metric that measures your current energy level based on several other readings, including your heart rate variability (another new one on this device), stress, activity, sleep, diet, and hydration. The body battery is a score between 0 and 100, and for most of the last couple of weeks, it would be as high as 88 and as low as the mid-40s, usually after a long jog. The highest number recorded yesterday was 26, which was before I set out on my jog. By 12:30, when I came in from my run, it was below 20, and would drop to a 6 by the time I mercifully fell into bed. When I woke up shortly after 7:15am this morning, it was a much more tenable 76. It is no wonder, as it is the first night in a week that the watch recorded my sleep as good, with over 8 hours asleep. My sleep score last night was 88 (Good), compared to the previous night’s 42 (Poor), and 62 (Fair), 44 (Poor), 79 (Fair) the previous nights. My last good night was Monday.

    After recording my webinar (which went much better than anticipated), I set out on my jog. I was less than a kilometre into it when I realized that the Body Battery reading was not a joke. I was a zombie out there and pulled up at the 2km mark – something I have not done in well over a month. I walked another 4km but decided to stop at the supermarket to pick up a chicken to roast and vegetables for a salad. I also cheated with a bag of mini crisps, which I knew was a bad idea. I was not making good decisions. I am also pretty sure that anyone who looked at me yesterday would have seen that I was dead on my feet. After eating my chicken and salad for lunch, I sat on the balcony with a cigar chatting with my wife. I did not get through the whole cigar because I needed to go inside for a nap. I would never have made it through my class had I not slept for an hour first.

    The result on the bathroom scale as of this morning unsurprisingly showed a gain of 3.6 lbs. from yesterday. I ate a big lunch, a big dinner, and the entire bag of mini crisps. I did it because I would not have gotten through the day without them… but I knew I would pay the price today. The small comfort is that I stepped onto the scale twice – the first time immediately when I got out of bed, and the second when I usually do – after my regular morning bathroom rituals, which mercifully included a very productive bowel movement. The difference between the two weigh-ins was nearly two pounds. I was neither happy with nor surprised by the 3.6 lbs. gain… had it been 5.6 lbs. I would have been much less pleased and much more surprised. I will do better today, both with regard to food intake (which will be back to zero, save for my meal replacements), and with my exercise (I will try to jog at least 5km today, and hopefully more). It will take a couple of days to recover the ground that I lost, but 2-3 days of discipline should get that done.

    Despite my poor performance on the road yesterday, I still managed to sneak into the top 17.5% of the 2023 Challenge, also breaking the top 25,000. Considering there are now 143,000 participants registered, I think that is pretty impressive. I have no delusions that I am going to be in the top 5% by the end of the year, but I do not have to be. How the current leaders have recorded 4,500 km walking and running this year is beyond me, and I will never be in that kind of shape again. I don’t even know if I was in that kind of shape when I was in the Army. I know that the person who is ranked 500th has recorded 1,253km so far, just under 12km per day if he walked or jogged every day since January 1. In a side-by-side comparison, I have averaged just over 3km per day in that time. I know that with the exception of a few days, in January and February I was only walking my dog, and although I did start running on February 11, there were still only six days in February when I recorded runs, and only on five of those days did I exceed 6km combined walking and jogging. Compare that to March, a month in which I recorded 20 days over 6km. We are halfway through April, and I have thus far only recorded six days over 6km, but that includes the week when I was in Dallas with a torn-up foot and a work schedule that was not conducive to getting out. The next two weeks that end with my getting married to Leslie on Day 15 (for those of you who are not regular readers, we were married last year in a civil ceremony, but on April 30 we are having a religious service) should allow me to match March’s 20 days. All this to say is that it is unlikely that I will crack the top 1000 on the 2023 Challenge, but if I keep up my current pace, it is not unheard of that I might crack the top 10%. Of course, I love tracking these things, but I am not in competition with anyone but myself. I do not have to beat the Gerald Sinclair who has averaged 12km per day since January 1… I have to beat the Mitch Garvis whose average for January was 1.4km per day, and whose average for February was only slightly better at 2.15km per day, and whose average for March shot up to nearly 6km per day. I have to remember that walking the dog does not count as exercise, even though the steps technically register. I need to be the best me that I can be.

    With my increased body battery (currently at a comfortable 72), I will go for a jog around 11:30am, and then will drive out to Cambridge to spend the afternoon with Ryan et al. I have a few things I need to bring to him, and it will be good to see him anyways. He has been going through some crap at work, and I want to be there for him as a friend. He asked me yesterday when we discussed it if I would join them for dinner (he is making kebabs and salad) and I told him yesterday that I would let him know. This morning I told him that I would come out for cigars, but I would absolutely not be eating with them. Yesterday was a cheat day, and I am not sorry that I did that (although I wish I had not eaten quite as much as I did), but I will not be doing it two days in a row. Tomorrow morning, I will step onto the bathroom scale and my weight will be down from today, even though it will still be up from yesterday. One day off track is understandable, especially with how I was feeling. Two days would be unacceptable, except under very specific circumstances. I am feeling good today, and those circumstances are not present. That means I am staying on track!

    Charlie (Princess Sophie’s friend) just went home, so I will be able to get out for my jog a little earlier than anticipated. I will stay on track today, and hopefully my jog will be a lot more successful than yesterday’s (of which I am not even recording my stats). When I get home, I will shower, then make sure to have a meal replacement before heading out. I will also pack one to take with me, knowing that I will likely be out past when I would normally eat my third one. Leslie is currently on a plane bound for Central America, and I am worried about her. I know that when she lands, she will let me know that she is safe, but I do not like that I cannot be there with her. I suppose this is what I will be focusing on while I jog. I might take a break from my audio books and catch up on some of my favourite podcasts. It has been a couple of weeks since I did that, which means there will be more than enough for me to get through a 90-minute jog (optimism springs eternal) and then my car ride to Cambridge.

    My plans for today are to get back on track, to be mindful and focused, and to shed the day-over-day weight gain from yesterday to be back into best weight ever territory by Monday or Tuesday. Again, optimism. In lieu of eating, I will enjoy a couple of really nice cigars, and I will enjoy the company of a couple of friends. Tomorrow I am likely heading to Hamilton to spend the afternoon with Lyle and Dorothy but let me take one day at a time.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 450

    I did something stupid yesterday. I stopped for peanuts not once, but twice. The first time I stopped, I picked up $1 worth of them after collecting my pendant from the jewelers, who had called earlier in the day to let me know it was repaired. The second time was on my way to Taekwondo. I don’t know why I was still hungry after my third meal replacement of the day (and a handful of peanuts to boot) but I was, and I did not want to find myself lagging at Taekwondo. I picked up another $1.25 worth of peanuts, eating half of them on my way to the school, the remainder on the drive home from the school.

    I did something smart yesterday. Rather than returning home, peanuts forgotten, and preparing my fourth meal replacement of the day, I decided that the peanuts had been my fourth meal replacement of the day. I lit up a cigar on the balcony and called my wife. It was another lovely date inside the dreaded Rectangle Zone. In thirteen days, we will be together again. For now, we do what we have to do.

    When I set out for my jog yesterday, I was hoping for more than I accomplished. In the end, I pulled up after just under 6.25km and walked the rest of the way home. There are just days like that, and I am not disappointed in myself. Since returning from Dallas, I have jogged or walked just under 40km, which discounts my walks with Princess Sophie because I do not start my exercise tracking for those walks. How could I be disappointed by that? I have a webinar that I have to deliver this morning, after which I will hit the road again. I will try for more, but if I can only do 5km then that is 5km more than I was able to do just a few short months ago.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 6.23km (502km)
    • Duration: 47:51 (39:00)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m40s (7m45s)
    • Steps: 7,500 (6,100)
    • Calories burned: 633 (653)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 156 (156)

    My friend came over for a cigar yesterday, and the two of us marveled at our progress. The day that he took my Before Picture I would swear that the two of us together would have tipped the scales at over 850 lbs. We figured out that together we have lost about 300 lbs., and we look and feel so much better for it. He is a good friend, and when he had a mini stroke in November I was truly scared. Yesterday afternoon we sat on the balcony and enjoyed a cigar, talked about life and everything, and realized that with our progress, we would be around to do that for a lot more years.

    Occasionally I will step onto the bathroom scale at night. I do not save the record, but I know that whatever I weigh before bed will be on average two pounds heavier than what I will weigh in the morning. It is not often that the numbers at night are lower than they were that morning, but that was the case last night. At 11:30pm my weight matched my best weight ever from March 31. Imagine, I thought, how I would feel if indeed I dropped a couple of pounds overnight? Well, it was not a full two pounds, but I was 1.6 lbs. lighter this morning than I was yesterday, putting me solidly back into my best weight ever category. It feels amazing knowing that I weigh less than I have in over twenty years! I want to keep it up and continue losing weight until I am where I want to be. It would be easy to say to myself that I have done enough; to be a fifty-year-old man who weighs 250 lbs. at my height… do I really need to fit into my Army uniform? I have lost over 140 lbs.; my wife finds me attractive (and always has) … what am I trying to prove by losing another 50 lbs.? I am not going to say that there have not been times when I have thought that. No, that is not the plan. I am not moving the goalposts and declaring victory. I do not know how much more weight I will lose, but I know that I am not ready to quit. We are a little over 2.5 months from my birthday (which will be Day 533). I have told both Leslie and my friend that unless something goes seriously askew, I will be off the program by then. Will I stop losing weight at that point? I do not know. I only know that I am feeling amazing these days… despite minor aches from jogging.

    I am going to lie down for an hour. I did not sleep well last night, and I want to be at least somewhat awake when it is time to record my webinar. My plan for the rest of the day is to jog, then after my shower I will spend some time on the phone with my beautiful wife. It is another gorgeous day out, and a cigar in the afternoon is not out of the question. This evening I will teach but will take the time during the break to light the Shabbat candles. I will stay mindful and focused, and with that I should be able to stay on track.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 449

    I cheated again yesterday. After a 5km jog I came home, showered, and headed out to my dentist appointment. As I was preparing to leave, I noticed it was 12:45pm, so I still had thirty minutes before I would be ready for my second meal replacement of the day. What I did not take into consideration is that I would likely not be home before 3:00pm. I bought a handful of peanuts at Bulk Barn to tide me over. Aside from that, I was true to the program; I was hungry in the afternoon (despite the handful of peanuts and my (late) midday meal replacement), but instead of eating more, I sat outside with a cigar. There are a lot of temptations in this world, and it would be so easy for me to just walk to the corner to pick up a snack. I am staying the course because I am on a mission to be slim!

    My intention from the outset was to take it easier than I have been these last couple of days. I had a short timeframe in which to run, and I did not want to be late for my dentist appointment. As well, I woke up with jelly legs yesterday morning. I know that I can only push myself so hard before I risk hurting myself, and I do not want that. I felt that a 5km run would do just fine… and I stopped off at the pharmacy to pick up my prescription.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 502km (12.02km)
    • Duration: 39:00 (1:36:17)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m45s (8m00s)
    • Steps: 6,100 (14,350)
    • Calories burned: 653 (1,534)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 156 (149)

    I admit I am a bit relieved that my doctor told me that I can continue on the full program for a couple more months. I suspect that if I had to, I could start eating proper foods again, and still lose weight gradually. I think I have learned the lessons I need to learn, and bags of chips on airplanes notwithstanding, I think that for the first time in my life I now have the skills to diet. With that said, I would love to get as close to my next few goals as possible before returning to that path. I suspect that the next few months will look like this:

    • I will stay on the full-fast for the next two weeks until I fly to Dallas. I will go off the program almost entirely for the first half of my trip, which will include one day in Dallas and four days in California, during which Leslie and I are celebrating our Jewish wedding together… not a good time to be dieting. If I can drop to 245 lbs. by April 27, I will be quite thrilled. Anything below 250 lbs. will still be a success.
    • Upon my return to Canada (Sunday, May 7) I will resume the full-fast program the following morning and will stay true to it throughout the month of May.
    • That first week that I am back in Canada I will drive into Scarborough one last time to pick up one last case of the meal replacements.
    • Starting the beginning of June, I will begin my transition off the program and onto regular (but mindful) foods. Throughout the month of June, I will follow a partial program. I should mention that there is a good chance that my wife will be visiting me in Canada some time that month, which would be a very good time to not be on the full-fast program anyways.
    • It is my hope that on or around July 1st, I will be off the program. I might, if I have meal replacements left, continue to use them for breakfast. However, by my birthday I would like to be completely done with the program. (Leslie and I discussed today that it might be nice to spend my birthday with her in Dallas, and I am giving serious thought to that)

    How much will I weigh by then? I don’t know. July 1 is a little over 2.5 months from now, and it would not be unheard of for me to lose nearly thirty pounds in that time… especially if I keep up my jogging. As of this morning, I am about 23 lbs. from dropping out of Obesity Class I and into the Overweight classification. If I can accomplish that by then, I will be declaring victory. That is not to say that I will not try to continue losing weight and getting back into shape, but once I am there, then I will not be using meal replacements, only traditional healthy eating.

    Today is the third day in a row without a successful bowel movement, at least in the morning. I am hoping that at some point during the day I will finally feel the need. In the meantime, I was thrilled to see that while I am still just shy of my best weight ever from Day 436, the bathroom scale reported my weight at my previous best weight ever this morning. It took me ten days to gain nine pounds; it has taken only four days to shed 8.8 pounds. As I discussed with Leslie yesterday, I truly feel that had I eaten exactly as I had eaten in Dallas but had not completely stopped jogging, then I would not have gained nearly as much as I did. Lesson learned. Whether it will be 5km or 15km, we agree that I should try to jog daily going forward, especially when I do start the transition off of the program. In the meantime, while it is unlikely that I will maintain this rate of loss, if I were to lose 3.5 lbs. per week, by my birthday I would weigh just under 214 lbs.… a number that I am reasonably certain I did not weigh even in the Army. It is important to realize that I was a lot more muscular then than I am now, and I doubt I would ever be that buff again. In fact, I am not even trying for buff… I am trying for slim.

    Today is Thursday, and if I stay focused and mindful, and if I get in a good jog, then there is a very good chance that tomorrow morning I will achieve a new best weight ever. As the Hebrew folk song says, if it is not tomorrow, then the following day. Trust me, it is more melodic in Hebrew. You can listen to it at this link if you feel like it.

    I have some important phone calls to make today, and I also have to finish putting together my slides and script for tomorrow’s webinar on cybersecurity threat detection. As much as I was looking forward to my session last week, this week’s session does not hold the same allure for me. No matter, it has to get done. I have a focus group at 1:00pm which I need to attend, and later in the afternoon a buddy is tentatively coming over to smoke cigars. It will be nice to see him – it has been too long. If all goes well, the first part of the evening I will be at Taekwondo, followed by another lovely cigar date with my wife. We are now two weeks from my next trip down there, and we are both eager… and it is nice that this time we do not have to wait quite so long between visits. Admittedly, the wait between the end of my previous visit and the last one was shorter, but that was an unplanned and unexpected bonus. This time, when she and her son dropped me at the airport on Sunday, we knew that the goodbye was for fewer than twenty days. It is easier than some of our partings have been, especially the ones when we did not know how long it would be… or when we knew it was 6-8 weeks.

    My plan for the day is to stay the course. I have been doing so well, and with my doctor’s blessing yesterday I see no reason to change anything. I will try to avoid the need to stop off for peanuts today (as I have done now two days in a row), but if I do need to snack then I will do so mindfully (as I did yesterday, with my total bill from Bulk Bark coming to $0.83, taxes included). When I finish this journal entry, I will go for a jog. Once again, I am not going to try to push myself too hard or too far, but I will probably shoot for 8-10km. —

    My hopes were answered! When I finished writing that last paragraph, I was able to move my bowels, and am feeling much better for it. I will not step back onto the scale, but it might have made a difference. That difference will wait for tomorrow morning’s daily encounter with the bathroom scale! In the meantime, my previous thoughts about taking fibre can be shelved for the time being.

    Okay, let’s get moving. Today will be a busy day; following a couple of phone calls, it will start with a jog, then a few hours of work.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 448

    On Monday, I jogged 5.6km and then walked 7.3km. Yesterday I ran the same route… except I jogged 12km, literally crushing it! Yes, I pulled up with under 1km to go, and I walked the rest of the way. It felt absolutely amazing! Five of those kilometres were under 7m42s, with three more under 8 minutes even. I know that there are two factors (aside from fatigue) that slow me down: jogging uphill and jogging into the wind. Because of that, my sixth kilometre was my slowest, at 8m43s. While I heard my app read that into my ear, I was a little disheartened, but I kept going anyways. While I would slow down afterwards, my best kilometre was actually my eighth. Yes, I was extremely pleased by my progress. I might take a break today because of a hectic schedule, but if I keep this up, I will finally earn that 15km badge in the next couple of weeks.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 12.02km (5.6km)
    • Duration: 1:36:17 (41:34)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 8m00s (7m25s)
    • Steps: 14,350 (6,435)
    • Calories burned: 1,534 (576)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 149 (155)

    I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that there is a challenge on one of my apps to run or walk 1,023 kilometres in this calendar year. Following yesterday’s workout, I am now 29% done (with 299.77km tracked as activities). I am also ranked in the top 18.6% of participants. While that only has me ranked 26,222, as of this morning there are over 141,000 people signed up for the challenge. That means that I am actually ahead of over 114,500 people. Of course, there is no prize for finishing first. The prizes are a lottery drawn of the people who finish the full 1,023km in the year. If I continue at this pace, I am well on my way to accomplishing that. I do not care if I win one of the prizes or not. Accomplishing that goal will be amazing enough.

    I did cheat a little yesterday. I bought a small bag of peanuts, which I ate in the car. I was stuck in traffic getting out of Toronto for over two hours, and I needed something. After all, having burned over 1,500 calories on my jog, I knew that I might get away with it. Yes, that will slightly affect my weight loss when I step onto the scale at the doctor’s office, but I needed it. I also drank a lot of water!

    Yesterday was also my best steps day in years, clocking over 21,500 steps. I may not be down from my last weigh-in… but I am certainly doing what I need to do in order to get back on track. Considering that between March 31 and April 10 I actually gained nine pounds, I am really happy that I am well on my way to losing all of that in less than a week.

    When I was speaking with Leslie last night, she mentioned that she thought that I ate pretty well while I was in Dallas. I reminded her that the day before I flew down, I broke my diet because I was not feeling well (accounting for a two-pounds gain recorded before I flew on April 1). Additionally, when I was there, aside from eating late at night a few times, I also ate a lot of matzah (with quite a bit of peanut butter), not to mention the entire bag of chips I ate on the airplane coming home. My weight gain is nobody’s fault but my own.

    In any event, according to the bathroom scale this morning I am down another 3.4 lbs. from yesterday. I have dropped all of the weight that I gained in Dallas plus nearly half a pound and am 1.6 lbs. from again reaching my best weight ever. It feels great to know that in contrast to how things usually work, it took me just two days to shed the weight that I gained over eight days. I have so often lamented that it would usually take a few days to lose the weight gained from a single cheat day. I am energized by this success and will continue to stay on track today. Unlike most mornings when I am off to the doctor’s office, I did not even brew my pot of coffee when I came in from walking the Princess. I will do that upon my triumphant return. What would I consider a triumphant weigh-in? Just yesterday I would have said that if my weight is stable from three weeks ago, or even if I am only a few ounces heavier, then I would be happy. Based on my bathroom scale weigh-in, I might be as much as 1kg down. That will be huge for me indeed, considering the last couple of weeks.

    I am off to the doctor’s office, hoping for good news (which would be little or no gain from my last visit three weeks ago). I am also looking forward to discussing my gastro issues with him, and whether or not I should start weening myself off the full-fast program now, or if I could continue through June. I also have to discuss my ADHD medication, and whether I need to increase (or lower) the dosage, or if we should be trying a different medication. There are some days when I feel fine, but there are others when I am just not as focused as I should be… and when I seem to talk a lot more than I did a month ago. I’ll see you all in a jiffy!

    —

    I have developed a great rapport with the nurse who weighs me at the doctor’s office, and she is always amazed by how well I am doing. This morning she looked at me even before I stepped onto the scale and told me that she thought I have lost even more weight. I was not sure, but in fact my weight was down 1.3kg from three weeks ago. No, it is not the same pace I have been losing the last few weigh-ins (as much as 4.7kg lost from three weeks ago), but it is still a loss. Considering the realities of the last few weeks, that is a huge win for me!

    The other issues that I discussed with the doctor were all good news. He feels I should stick with my current medication (and dosage) for another month to see if external factors may have played a part in my changes, and he feels that I can safely stay on the full fast program for another month or two without concern. I asked him about blood work, and he told me that even though I have lost 50 lbs. since he last tested me, there was nothing of concern then (December) so he does not think we need to retest now. In a few months we will revisit that. He also told me that the ultrasound of my knee was clean, so I can continue jogging, and as we have discussed before, I should let pain be my guide… if I have to slow down or shorten my jogs, then do so.

    Speaking of which, if I do not get out now then I will not be able to do it at all today. I just finished a great meeting with a training broker who wants to work with me, but it went longer than it was supposed to, so I have to hurry up. I was not planning on jogging as long today as I did yesterday, but I know that I have to be home at 11:30 so that I can shower before heading out to the dentist.

    My plan for today remains the same… I will stay mindful and focused, and I will keep crushing it.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 447

    I am not sure why I was not able to jog farther than I did yesterday. I pulled up at a little over 5.5km, opting to powerwalk the rest of the way. The two workouts combined for 12.9km, respectable by any measure. I just do not know why I stopped running. My legs were not bothering me, nor were my lungs. There was just an overall feeling of… something. While the walking did not break any records for me, it was certainly much faster paced than it had been since I started jogging, with my last complete kilometre clocking at 9m16s, which is not too shabby! My jogging pace was quite respectable as well, with three of my 5.6km clocked at 7.16s or faster. This morning I will hit the trails once more and see how much farther I can jog than I did yesterday. I might try to run the same path, only hopefully I will get farther before slowing my pace.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 5.6km (4.09km)
    • Duration: 41:34 (34:22)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m25s (8m24s)
    • Steps: 6,435 (5,200)
    • Calories burned: 576 (450)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 155 (151)

    Walking

    • Distance: 7.3km
    • Duration: 1:11:06
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 9m44s
    • Steps: 9,950
    • Calories burned: 689
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 140

    Leslie and I had a conversation about my running shoes last week. Most experts say that running shoes have a life expectancy, and a quick glance at the studies online shows me that most of my shoes are ready to be retired. There is one pair that is an exception to that, but most of my running shoes are approaching what looks like their golden years. That is before we even consider the fact that every pair of running shoes that I own knew my feet when I was well over 300 lbs., which would be a big factor in further reducing the life expectancy of them. All this to say that I think it is about time I look into ordering a new pair or two… especially if I am going to do a lot of running over the spring and summer.

    I have to drive into Toronto this afternoon for a meeting, which will be a bit of a schmooze-fest, but it is with someone who knows a lot of people in my industry and is going to try to get me interviews with a few companies. Knowing my current situation, I am not sure how I feel about taking a job in Canada… but contracts are always good, and it never hurts to know more people. This person was introduced to me by a former colleague who I respect, and who respects me; he would not knowingly be wasting my time. The only complication with that is the driving to and from the city… mostly from, based on the timing. I will likely stay put until the worst of the rush hour traffic is past, and then drive back to Burlington. To be safe, I will take my Taekwondo kit with me, because I would really like to get to class this evening.

    Okay, so I ran yesterday… and I walked. I also got back on the full-fast program and did not have any issues on that front. I did notice I was a little peckish as I lay in bed, but I am sure that was more mental than physical; I did not lie awake with hunger pangs; it was more of a quick ‘I think I’m a bit hungry’ as I spoke with Leslie… who reminded me that I was probably not hungry at all. She was right! I told her during our conversation that I was expecting my weight to drop dramatically from yesterday (when it rose dramatically). She reminded me that I had been off my program for ten days, and I should not expect to lose it all in one day. I assured her that I expected it would take at least a week to shed all the weight I had gained. After all, I was a whopping nine pounds heavier than my best weight (March 31, eleven days ago). The bathroom scale was very kind to me this morning, giving me back an incredible four pounds of progress, and dropping me, once again, below that dreaded 260 lbs. mark. While I am still five pounds from my best weight ever, I am only three pounds heavier than I was the morning I flew to Dallas eleven days ago… which was the morning after I had a pretty big cheat meal because of the scare with my bowels. I am feeling good, and while my hemorrhoids are still bothering me, the other bowel issues (which came with stomach cramps) seem to be gone. Nonetheless, I will still be speaking with my doctor about the issues tomorrow, and we will discuss if it is safe for me to continue on the full fast program… at least for another six weeks or so.

    Another issue I plan to discuss with my doctor tomorrow is my ADHD medications. The first couple of months on them I felt like a new man, with a renewed energy and focus, while being able to sit still without interrupting people all the time. These last few weeks – possibly since the last dosage increase – I have not felt quite so focused; at first, I thought it was just me, but when Leslie asked about it, I realized that it is real, and that I had better speak with the doctor. That meeting is tomorrow morning, which works out perfectly because tomorrow I will take the last pill in my previous prescription. I had called the pharmacy to renew, but if I do not collect the pills, and I get a new prescription from my doctor tomorrow, then they will simply cancel the old one and give me the new dosage… or new medication, as the case may be. That is not a subject that I am expert in and will listen to what the doctor has to say about it.

    Over the next two hours the temperatures should be jumping from the current 8° to 14° at 10:00am and peaking at 19° from 2-6pm. It is partly cloudy out, and while there was a bit of a breeze as I walked Her Floofness this morning, it was no worse than that. From 2:00pm the forecast calls for high winds, which seem to die down by 7:00pm. It looks like if all goes well, by the time I get home from Taekwondo this evening, the weather will be perfect to enjoy a cigar on the balcony. I finished my book yesterday afternoon, which means I should be giving some thought to my next read. I think I am going to continue with the current trend – I am listening to an audiobook that is fiction and will look for something in non-fiction to read on my e-book reader. An old friend of mine has written several books on cybersecurity, including one on the Dark Web that I have been meaning to read for a couple of years. <ten minutes later> I just reached out to him to ask if he thinks it is still relevant. Hopefully I will get an answer before it is time to read!

    My plans for today, with regard to my weight management program, are to stay on track and stay mindful. I will be going for my jog around 10:00am, after which I will come home, shower, answer any e-mails I may get, and then have my second meal replacement before heading out to Toronto. I will be taking my third meal replacement with me so that I can have it in the car before Taekwondo and will then have my fourth shake after Taekwondo (and before my cigar, should I be able to enjoy one). Staying on track and staying mindful are the best way to guarantee that I get back on track this week. I know that unless I have another tremendous weight drop tomorrow, I will not have lost weight between doctors’ visits for the first time since January. It’s okay though. I made the conscious decision to go off the program for good reason, and I stand by it. The fact that it coincided with a week of not being able to exercise did hurt a little, but I am back on track, and the weight will continue to come off. Mindfulness and focus are how I will ultimately succeed.

    Have a great day folks!