Losing a part of me

Author: Mitch Garvis

  • Day 446

    Okay, let’s get back on track. Starting right now, I am on track again. The numbers on the bathroom scale this morning scared me straight, and I am back on the full fast program… at least, for now. I do not know how much longer I will do it, and I might transition to a partial program sometime soon… but I weigh nine pounds more than I did at my best weight ever, and I am going to shed that off in a hurry. Also, I know that in less than three weeks I am getting married to my wife (yes, we are already married, and yes, this is the ceremony we are looking forward to, not just the two of us in the courthouse), so I want to look as good as I can!

    Why, you may ask, did I gain so much weight from yesterday to today? It is easy to chalk it up to air travel, but I am the first to admit that I cheated… a lot. At the airport, I sat down for a meal of a veggie omelet, which is not at all bad. While I am sure they fry it in too much oil, and to make it tastier they add more cheese than necessary, I still know that three eggs at dinnertime was not my downfall. Nor, I should mention, was the remaining half-handful of almonds that I still had in my knapsack from the flight down. It was the bag of chips that I bought at the airport, knowing that the only snacks available to me on the plane would not be kosher for Passover. Also, it was the meal replacement that I had after midnight when I came home, not wanting to go to bed hungry. Two really stupid moves. It was already going to take me at least a few days to get back down to my best weight ever… now I am just that much farther from it. The journey starts now, and it starts with me back on the program, and it continues with me getting out to jog today.

    It is a beautiful day in Burlington, but I miss Leslie already. It is always wonderful when we are together, and so much more difficult each time we are apart. I know that this will change eventually, but not soon enough for us.

    The forecast for today is sunny until 3:00pm, at which point it clouds over. By noon (in an hour) the temperatures should be around 13°, going up to 17° over the following two hours. That should be the sweet spot for my first outdoor jog in a couple of weeks. When I get home, after I shower, I will have my second meal replacement of the day, and then I will probably sit outside on the balcony with a cigar. I am teaching this evening, and tomorrow during the day I have to work on my cybersecurity presentation that I am doing on Friday. I have already created the outline for it, now I just have to fill in all of the slides, and then write a script for it. This should be fun, but as with my last one, it will be a lot of work!

    I am not treating today as another Day 1 on the program; It is simply the day that I return to it from holiday. While I am reasonably sure the meal replacements are not strictly kosher for Passover, they will do me fine, and Hashem will understand. In 2020 I fell off the wagon hard after Yom Kippur. That will not happen this time around. I went over some bumps, but I am righting the ship… starting right now.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 445

    When I press publish on this journal entry for my blog, I will get a notice that I am on a 219-day streak. In just a few more days, my current streak will exceed the original streak of 225 days, which lasted through September 1. I will match that on Saturday, surpassing it Sunday. This is one of those irrelevant statistics that I like to keep track of. For example, while I post absolutely every single day, there are fully 101 more blog entries than days on my diet (this entry will be blog post #546). I know that in the first few months I would write a couple of times per day, especially when I was writing about my fitness walking. No matter. My blog now has 182 subscribers, although I wonder how many of those are bots who are just collecting data to try to market to me. In 2023, the blog has 1,941 views, which will eventually dwarf the 4,995 views that it had in 2022 (today is April 9 so we are just over a quarter of the way through the year). There are much fewer comments this year (15 so far, compared to the 81 from 2022). The journal is slightly more than 432,000 words… still not approaching the 587,000 words in Tolstoy’s War and Peace, verbose nonetheless.

    I made it through the movie yesterday without any issues, but when we got home, I was hungry. I enjoyed some matzah before dinner, which was Leslie’s scrumptious chicken salad. As it is still Passover, my sandwich options were limited, so I decided to simply eat it with a fork. She does something with Tony Sachere seasoning that is simply delicious!

    I woke up this morning after another good night of sleep. I was only very slightly productive in the bathroom. I am not surprised, with three days backed up (which is not unusual for one with a high matzah diet), to be up slightly. I am happy I am still under my 2020 best weight yet, but when I get back to Canada, I am going to kick the matzah diet, and do my best to lose a couple of pounds this week. I have not yet decided if I am going to go back to the full program, or to the partial program… but I do know that I am going to be back in the gym (and running in the street) again. This week has been lazy in that regard for a couple of reasons; starting tomorrow, any day that I do not exercise will be an excuse.

    My plan for today is to stay mindful. I will have lunch with Leslie and her son, and then around 4:00pm we will head to the airport for another tearful goodbye. Fortunately, this time we know that it will not be a long separation, as I will be back in Dallas in under 18 days… and we will then be flying to California to get married.

    Speaking of which, everything that I ordered for the wedding arrived yesterday. The ketubah, which seems to be correct, arrived in the largest flat package we had ever seen. It was definitely protected! The kippahs (yarmulkes) arrived as well, in a much smaller package (probably because they are not as delicate). As Leslie’s wedding band arrived earlier in the week, that ends the non-consumable items. The rest – food and such – will be delivered to the synagogue the day of. It is amazing to think that the big day is three weeks from today! Leslie is anxious, and so am I… but when it is all over, it will have been worth it. And yes, I will be eating cake that day.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 444

    Despite my second unproductive morning in a row, it was such a sight to see when I stepped onto the bathroom scale to discover that my weight has, once again, dropped below 260 lbs., if only by a tiny fraction. Yesterday, my weight was back down to match my best weight from 2020, so this morning I dropped below that once again, hopefully for the last time. Once I am back home, I will be able to resume my exercise regimen, which even if I were to maintain my current eating (that is, not back on the meal replacements at all), would likely see me losing more weight. For now, I am hoping that when I step onto the scale at the doctor’s office on Wednesday that I weigh slightly less than I did at my previous weigh-in there. This morning I am still one pound heavier than I was that morning on my bathroom scale, so I as long as I am able to stay on track, I should be able to lose more than that between now and then.

    My diet these last couple of days has essentially consisted of chicken and matzah, and whatever I might put on the matzah (which alternates between margarine with jam and charoset with horseradish). I also had a really large iced tea yesterday which was really tasty but has 226 calories and a whopping 60g of sugar. It is a wonderful treat, but I have to remember that it should be only that… an occasional treat. I might think about cutting down to a smaller size in future, but with the extreme heat of the Texas summer ahead, I might stick with the large size which does help with hydration.

    This afternoon we are going to see a movie, which under normal circumstances would be a terrible temptation for me. During Passover I am not allowed to eat popcorn (with or without butter) so there is a good chance that I will not have any snacks and will get through that unscathed. I will have lunch before we go, which will, once again, consist of leftover chicken (which really is so tasty!) that needs to be finished before I leave tomorrow evening. There are some people who, like me, will continue to enjoy the same leftover meal for days on end. Others cannot do that, so I know that whatever I do not eat will probably go into the garbage. Leslie and her son have been eating whatever they will eat – neither of them are Jewish, so the rules of Kashrut do not apply to them – and it has not bothered me one bit. Leslie did mention that they were trying to be respectful around me, but I assured her that I am not in the least bit bothered by whatever they might be eating. As for them not wanting to eat the leftovers… that just means more yummy chicken for me!

    There is also enough charoset left over to choke a horse… I do not know if Leslie will eat any of it once I go home, but I know that I cannot take it with me, so I am enjoying it (in moderation) until I go. I never understood why Jews only make charoset for the Passover Seder… it is so delicious, and there is nothing to stop us from making it all year round? The point is that we don’t, and that’s life. I do know that I would not want to have the sweet kosher wine in the house… it is not something that regular people would choose to drink but is necessary for making the tasty charoset (which is meant to be symbolic of the mortar that the enslaved Israelites made in Egypt).

    The plan for today is to stay on track… I will be mindful, and even though we might be eating dinner out, Leslie and I have already discussed a restaurant option where I can eat without violating my religious dietary requirements. It will be a different chicken meal, which does not bother me at all… I can eat chicken every day of the week and not get bored with it. I will not snack at the movies, and I will stay mindful should we take the boy somewhere there might be temptations. One thing I am going to have to start remembering is that when I exercise, I can take greater liberties with my eating than on days when I do not. My last ‘exercise’ was when I walked home from the lounge a week ago today, and while the walk was a respectable 6.25km, I did it in sandals which means I was not exerting myself like I would when powerwalking. I also did my foot with the blisters, which kept me from running the next few days. Yes, my foot has been healed for a couple of days, but my work schedule prevented me from getting out.

    I should mention that yesterday I recorded my session on Securing the Internet of Things, which I spent a lot of time working on this past week. I think it went really well and am looking forward to seeing the final post-production product, which is being released in a couple of weeks. This week I have to prepare another session, which will be recorded Friday. It is on another cybersecurity topic which I will have to spend some time looking at and putting together. I know what I am going to say, but I need to organize my thoughts into slides, and then write up a script for it. It is funny that I spend so much more time preparing for a 40-minute session than I ever do for an 8-hour class… the difference between being watched and being recorded!

    I am not excited to be returning to Canada tomorrow, but life must go on until we get our paperwork settled. It will come, we just have to be patient. For now, at least I have one more night with my lovely wife.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 443

    Yesterday went exactly as planned, which is a good thing. The charoset that I made was a bit of a paste, but everyone enjoyed it so I will call it a success. My chicken came out great, and my wife and stepson’s first Passover Seder was a success. I am truly blessed.

    This morning I got another positive reading from the bathroom scale, which is to say that I lost a little more weight. I made another omelet for breakfast, which I supplemented with a bit of matzah. I am going to be eating mostly protein for the rest of the day – there is plenty of leftover chicken for me to feast on, so I am not worried about hitting the carb-laden matzah too hard. This will be a smart move for many reasons, not the least of which is that matzah is binding, and my streak of mornings with successful bowel movements ended today.

    If all goes well, my weight might drop back below 260 lbs. before I return to Canada, and if not then certainly in my first couple of days back. The fact that I was actually eight pounds up after just a few days off the program was jarring, but I also know I was having stomach issues which I could not ignore. I also know that I have not been exercising since I got here, which would likely have mitigated the severe weight gain. I am not at all upset though… my health must come first.

    To my Jewish readers, have a Happy Passover; to my Christian readers, a blessed Good Friday. To one and all… have a great day folks!

  • Day 442

    I spent the afternoon yesterday at the cigar lounge working. When I got home, I took a shower, and then before my class started, I ate a couple pieces of matzah. I did this both because it is a mitzvah (commandment) to do so on the first night of Passover, but also because I was hungry. I had originally planned to go to the supermarket to pick up a chicken breast, or some other suitable food to prepare for dinner after class. I was worried I was running late, so that did not happen. I ended up having matzah and butter and jam for dinner and was quite satisfied by it.

    Today is the first day of Passover. As a kid, it was always my favourite holiday. The traditional foods are amazing, the story is inspiring, and the songs were always a lot of fun. It was the only holiday on which we would sit around the table and sing. I loved it and still do. Today I am older, and the Passover Seders of my childhood are far behind me. That does not mean that I will not sit with my tiny family this evening and try to share some of that same joy with them. I will be preparing a roasted chicken, and I will make charoset, which is a concoction of apples, nuts, cinnamon, honey, and sweet wine. It is the first time that I am making it, and I do not know how it will work out. I am sure it won’t be bad, but it won’t be terrible.

    With all of the matzah that I ate yesterday (including a pre-class snack and after class, plus some chocolate covered matzah that I shared with the family), I was still able to move my bowels this morning. I was also pleased that the numbers on the bathroom scale were substantially down. I am almost back down to my original best weight from 2020 (within .4 lb), which was a better than two-pound drop from yesterday morning. I was thinking that it will not be so difficult to get back to my best-weight-ever territory, which is still six pounds from where I am today. There will only be one or two restaurant meals the rest of this week (if we do not include salads), and so many of the cheat foods that I usually turn to on my partial program are off-limits to me because of the holiday. My diet will consist mostly of eggs for breakfast, salads for lunch, and light proteins for dinner. Even without the exercise that I had been doing prior to this week, I might still lose a couple more pounds before returning to Canada!

    My plans for today are to go shopping and then spend the day preparing for the Seder. It will be a very abridged Seder, but a fun one, nonetheless. While the charoset is a bit fattening, and the matzah is one big carbohydrate, everything else on the menu (read: roasted chicken) would be perfectly fine on my modified program… which I am not really doing now. This week my intention was to eat (mostly) smart, but the program was never on the agenda… at least, not after the stomach and bowel issues I have started late last week. On that front, I would not swear to it, but the swollen hemorrhoids might be reducing in size these last two days, as well as in discomfort. They are still absolutely there and big and huge and yucky, but either they are less so than they were, or I am just getting used to them. I am leaning toward the former, and that is not simple optimism. I know there are a lot of discomforts that I have gotten accustomed to over the years… I cannot imagine that is one of them.

    I made a lovely three-egg omelet for breakfast. A little bit of olive oil in the pan, a dash of milk in the eggs, some of the leftover cauliflower from the dinner I prepared the other night chopped up, and a bit of shredded sharp cheddar, all with a dash of salt. It was absolutely delicious and reminded me that I do not need bread… and I do not need my meal replacements to eat healthy.

    It is a cool and cloudy day today but that is fine because I do not plan to spend a lot of time outside. I have to go to the supermarket to buy a chicken and possibly another box of matzah… depending on whether this store has them or not. Other than that, I will be home most of the day. On second look I do not think the charoset will be too difficult to prepare (it is mostly about chopping fruit and nuts which will be done in the blender), and roasting a chicken is not new to me. The only thing I need to consider is what seasoning to put on the bird, but that will not be the hardest thing to decide.

    I suppose I should get started. Have a great day folks!

  • Day 441

    I ended up splurging yesterday evening. We decided to go for burgers. It was sooo good, but it is not something that I will miss having for the next two or three months. It was my only aberration from the program, and I still did reasonably well. For the first time since I left Canada, my weight dropped ever so slightly this morning. It was a welcome relief, even though I made the conscious decision to get off the program for my trip. I am not upset by what I weigh today… I would just prefer for my weight to not go any higher than it is now.

    This morning I had a bowl of breakfast cereal, which will be my last leavened food for eight days. My lunch will likely be a salad, but starting this evening I will be eating matzah (unleavened bread) with every meal. It is a Jewish tradition that commemorates the exodus from Egypt following the ten plagues; with the Pharoah Ramses II’s army chasing them, they did not wait for their dough to rise. Knowing the effects on the body that matzah can have, I suspect it might commemorate how tight their butt cheeks were knowing that if they were caught, they would be slaughtered. All this to say that 1) I am glad I have fibre for if (when) I need it, and 2) I am really glad that I have been able to clear out the backup in my bowels over the last few days, because it might be starting to build up again.

    Speaking of that, yesterday morning I finally moved my bowels three times, which went a long way to relieving the stomach discomfort that I have been experiencing these last few days. I was also successful with that this morning, so hopefully that is a sign that my issues are abating. It was less painful today than it has been, which I hope is a sign that my hemorrhoids are finally starting to go down. These last few days have been uncomfortable in so many ways, and it is nice to know that these pains are not permanent. For a minute there it felt they might be!

    My plan for today is to work, although in the afternoon I will migrate that work to the cigar lounge. I will have a salad for lunch, and after class this evening I will have a light dinner… maybe a chicken breast, but we will discuss our options shortly. I will start eating matzah as our laws and traditions dictate with dinner. Tomorrow, I have a lot of cooking and other food prep to do, which will take up most of my day. In the evening I will serve a traditional but very abridged Passover Seder meal, which will consist of the foods I prepare (including the full Seder Plate, but other than that it will be roasted chicken).

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 440

    My next appointment with my doctor is one week from today, and I have a couple of things that I need to discuss with him before I continue on the program; rather, whatever I end up deciding with regard to the program, I need to discuss them with them. I am not concerned that my weight is likely to be up from my last visit – rather, it is likely going to be the same, as I had lost a few pounds before regaining the few pounds. There is a reason I made the decision at the beginning of this journey to be monitored regularly by my physician; most of our meetings have been progress reports, but I know that it is impossible to lose this much weight without changes to the body, and while most of those changes are positive, there was bound to be one or two negatives in there. Welcome to Negative #1.

    (I am also interested in the results of my ultrasound, but that has been an issue for months, and is not nearly as urgent as the other things.)

    When I sat down to write this entry, I was feeling a bit dejected because I did stick to the plan yesterday – I had a bowl of cereal for breakfast, a salad for lunch, and a piece of fish with cauliflower for dinner – and I still gained a tiny bit of weight. I would have mentioned that I did enjoy a gin and tonic with my cigar last night, but that was the only change. I had even had a bit of a bowel movement in the morning, which has been the case almost every day. I had eaten my cereal and was in the middle of my coffee when the urge hit… I went to the toilet and had the first really substantial BM that I have had since the hemorrhoids started. I would normally never get onto the bathroom scale after having my breakfast, but I made the exception. Even having eaten, the weight that I had gained from yesterday was reversed. It is a relief to know that if I eat like I ate yesterday I might not lose weight, but I will not gain weight either. If that is what my maintenance will look like going forward, then I will be able to keep the weight off when I am where I eventually want to be.

    I met a really interesting man yesterday. He is a member of the Facebook group that I run for cigar lovers, and since he lives in this city I decided to reach out and connect with him. We sat at the lounge for three hours enjoying cigars and conversation. What makes him so interesting is that he is a Southerner who is quite right wing (I am a political moderate) and a devout Christian (I am Jewish)… and we sat and had long, respectful discussions about issues on which we do not agree, but we did it respectfully. It is so wonderful to know that with all of the extremists in this country (and in my own) who refuse to listen to the viewpoint of the other side, two people who do not agree can have respectful discourse and enjoy each other’s company. He and I will definitely be staying in touch.

    I hope to get back into running today, or at least walking. I have a few things that I do need to get done before that happens, but if I can head out for an hour this afternoon, I will be quite pleased with it. I know that had I been able to do so the last few days I would not have gained nearly as much weight as I have. The blister on the bottom of my foot is still… there; while I feel it, it is not painful as it was the last couple of days. I will make a gametime decision on that; if I decide not to go today, then tomorrow I will absolutely be hitting the trails (so to speak).

    My plan for today is to eat reasonably. I had a bowl of cereal for breakfast and will have a salad for lunch. Dinner is still up in the air, but Leslie and I will have something nice. This evening is the last night that I can eat chametz before Passover starts. While the holiday only starts tomorrow evening, it is customary to stop eating anything not ‘kosher for Passover’ around noon tomorrow… and knowing how bad the breakfast cereals I have been enjoying are for my weight, I will cut that out as well and make an omelet or something. I have always loved breakfast cereals, but I will be better off when they are an occasional indulgence and not a regular part of my diet. There are many aspects to the weight loss journey, and one of them is changing my habits and how I see different foods.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 439

    I am having a wonderful time, and I am not apologetic in the least (to anyone, but least of all to myself) that the bathroom scale has my weight slightly up again, on top of the tremendous jump from yesterday. It is not that I am overeating terribly, nor that I am making particularly bad food choices. For the second night in a row we came in very late and ate very late. I will get back on track today… I did have a bowl of cereal for breakfast (not a great choice), but lunch will be a salad, and for dinner I will prepare a nice piece of fish with a side vegetable – probably cauliflower.

    I did make sure to get all of my steps in yesterday. I am not running for a couple of reasons (and will not run today) but I did get a lot of walking in. While my body is feeling mostly fine, I do still have that niggling blister on the bottom of my foot that is making me hold back for another day. According to my fitness watch I have hit my steps target eight days in a row; I would like to keep that going, even though I will still hold back from running. If I do not then that is not the end of the world – I have a lot of things going on today, including a meeting this afternoon and teaching this evening. Come to think of it, unless a miracle happens, I suspect my streak will end today. Not the end of the world.

    My plan for today is to get back on track. My daily cheat was a bowl of breakfast cereal, which is not the worst thing in the world. I have already mentioned what else I will be eating. There will be cigars in the afternoon, and possibly in the evening as well. The main thing I have to remember is that after dinner (which will be later than usual because of my class, but not late) I will not eat anything else. If I stick to this plan, tomorrow morning the numbers on the bathroom scale should be a little forgiving of the last three days of transgressions.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 438

    My weight this morning was terrible. I know there are several factors involved, and I also know that I probably overdid it for a few weeks, so this blip (and it will be only a blip) is not going to bother me. I had little sleep, I had a reasonably unhealthy breakfast at the airport, I had a decent lunch, but between this and that, with the snacks I bought for the airplane (and which I had more of with a cigar later), and with the food I ate when I got home (in addition to a bowl of cereal, I also had several slices of dried fruit – and all of that very late at night), it is no wonder that the scale this morning was trying to scare me. Today I will be more mindful, and while I am not going back onto my full-fast, I will be more careful of what (and when) I eat. I am still taking a few days before going back onto my modified program, hoping that a couple of my issues do right themselves. I hope that by the time I get back to Canada they will all be a distant memory, and I can get back to losing weight.

    I did not jog yesterday, but I did decide to walk back to where I am staying from the cigar lounge. It was a 6.5 km walk which is absolutely nothing that would be a problem for me, but I was wearing sandals; even had I not slipped and stepped into a mud puddle reminiscent of the La Brea Tar Pits, I would still have had blisters. As it was, when I got back, I spent ten minutes spraying mud off the sandal… and my foot. I was planning to take a break from jogging for a couple of days, but I still wanted to reach my daily steps goal. I crushed it!

    Today I will not be jogging again, but I am going somewhere later in the day that will, once again, involve a lot of walking… and standing around. I will wear much more sensible shoes today and will take better care. The blisters on my feet are more a nuisance than they are a pain, but if I do not take care of them then I may be taking a longer break from jogging than originally planned.

    My goal is to return to Canada a week from today no more than ten pounds heavier than when I left. As long as I am mindful, I will be fine. If that sounds like a lot, you are right… but when you go from eating no carbs or starches to eating a lot of them, the weight can jump back quickly. Yesterday was a bad day for that, but the rest of the week I will be much more careful.

    Yesterday morning I posted on my Facebook wall before and after pictures, with the following message:

    I want to thank those of you who have offered words of support over my journey. Fourteen months ago I made the decision to stop being fat. I have been overweight since shortly after the Army, and I decided I did not want to be overweight anymore. To all of you with whom I was short when asked about it or offered advice, I am sorry… not sorry. Too many people have offered too many opinions and advice, and none of them are doctors or weight loss professionals.

    To those who want to know how much weight I have lost, the simple answer is that I have lost a healthy buxom supermodel… maybe a little more.

    To those who want to know how I did it, the simple answer is cigars and the flesh of those who thought their unsolicited advice was so necessary to foist on me.

    To those who have been supportive and offered words of encouragement, who have not tried to get me to eat or drink just this once, I thank you.

    To all of you, I love you all. While I have maintained a weight loss blog (that was always openly accessible, but never publicly discussed on open forums, this is the first time I am publicly discussing it and sharing my before and current photos. I say current and not after because I am not done… but it is time.

    I will never offer unsolicited advice, and I know what works for me might not be right for you. But if you want positive support and encouragement from someone who has been there, reach out.

    Picture 1 was taken on January 19, 2022. Picture 2 was taken on March 30, 2023.

    The response from friends and colleagues has been amazing. Now I have to stay like this… or keep getting better.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 437

    I’m on my way! Very excited to be sure.

    Two things happened yesterday. 1) I dropped below my best weight ever. 2) I dropped off the program… at least temporarily.

    I wrote about Number 1 in yesterday’s article, and that’s all good.

    So why did I drop off the program? Do I lack the willpower? I do not. Did I succumb to temptation? I did not. The simple answer is that I listened to my body. Nearly all week I have been suffering from bowl issues. Monday and Tuesday it would have been easy to write off to the foods that I ate over the weekend. By the time Friday afternoon rolls around and I am still having troubles, with the added consequence of the hemorrhoids (which are almost certainly related to the diarrhoea), and I have to accept that my body is trying to tell me something. Since Sunday I have jogged fifty kilometres, an average of over 8km per day. With the exception of Sunday, I have ingested little more than 900 calories per day. I am not a doctor, but I would not be surprised if my body were just saying that I have been overdoing it. After speaking with Leslie, I decided to make some food. I went a bit overboard… I had veggie burgers, then a bag of mini crisps. I am sure that tomorrow morning my weight will pop above this morning’s record-breaker, but I would rather be healthy.

    This morning I arrived at the airport and decided that while I would not be going nuts today, I would also not be restricting myself the way I have for so long. I sat down at the same restaurant where I had breakfast last time and ordered something different. After reading the description I realized that the breakfast poutine was not nearly as bad as it sounded, so I decided to give it a go. It was essentially scrambled eggs and cheese over hashbrowns, and it was quite tasty. I will likely have a salad for lunch today, but not because it is the only thing that I can eat without falling off a cliff. I will stay mindful, but I am going to give myself a fair bit more leeway over the next week than I have previously.

    I gained weight this morning according to the bathroom scale. I am two pounds up from yesterday, and no longer in best weight ever territory… but I am also trying to get my body back to health. As I stood waiting for my flight this morning, I remembered that it is so easy when one is not feeling well to think the worst, or to think that the pain or discomfort will be the new normal. I do not think that so, and I know that in a few days I will be getting back to normal with my issues. That does not mean I will be getting back to my full-fast program; that is something I will be giving a lot more thought to.

    I have been telling myself these last few weeks that I am nearing the end of my full-fast phase of weight loss, and at a certain point it will be time to ween myself off it. I have not made any decisions yet, but following my trip, assuming I am feeling better, I am going to speak with my doctor and am probably going to resume my partial program – three shakes and one meal per day, or two plus two. I think my intake might depend on my exercise. I think, however, that if these last couple of days is actually my body telling me to slow down, then before I resume anything serious, I want my doctor to give me an examination (including blood work) to make sure I am not doing any damage. I do not think that I am, but I have said from the very beginning that I want to do this the right way.

    I am presently 30,000 feet over South Bend, Indiana… I do not usually post from airplanes, but it is not unheard of. The rest of the day, following my arrival, will have fun, sun, and cigars. No word on my plans just yet because where I am going I will have to rely on others.

    Have a great day folks!