Losing a part of me

Category: Jogging

  • Day 462

    I am checked in for tomorrow’s flight! I am stoked. It was a massive technological pain in the rear, but it is done. I have my boarding pass, I have reserved my Uber pickup, and I am ready… in twenty-four hours I will be with my wife!

    My new clothes arrived on Monday, and yesterday I was able to collect both my alterations and my dry cleaning. The next few days will be a whirlwind of activity, but it will be completely worth it! We have the ketubah and the kippot, I have ordered the food, the wedding cake, and the wine. The food is being handled by the absolute Chassid who works for the community, and I will be making a generous donation into his pocket as well. The cake is being delivered Sunday morning from the kosher bakery in (or right near) Beverly Hills. The kosher wine has been ordered and paid for, and a friend is picking it up today or tomorrow from the winery in Oxnard. All of the honorifics have been assigned and agreed to. The rental car is booked and paid for, and the hotel is reserved. Tomorrow I will spend a few hours at the cigar lounge in Dallas, where they have put aside a number of special cigars that will be for Leslie, the Rabbi, and for me. In addition to that, I am bringing two boxes of Cuban cigars with us to share with our guests, which are already in Dallas. My ring is the same ring we exchanged at the courthouse in Dallas, but Leslie is getting a new ring (for religious reasons), which I already have. If there is anything that I am missing, then I do not know what it is.

    For those of you who think that this preparedness has somehow lessened my current levels of anxiety, I assure you that is not the case. With that said, at least I can maintain an outward calmness with the knowledge that everything that can be planned for has been taken care of.

    Unfortunately, none of that has curbed my emotional stress-snacking these last couple of days, and it is only the tremendous physical activity that I am pushing myself to continue that has stopped me gaining ten pounds this week.

    Speaking of physical activity, I did jog outside yesterday, and it was a great one. I am certain that it was my best-paced outdoor run since I was a soldier, with my slowest kilometre (the 2nd) coming in at 7m17s, and my best an incredible 6m56s. Even jogging into the wind (which blew from west to east) I was killing it!

    Jogging

    • Distance: 10.29km (8.12km)
    • Duration: 1:13:33 (54:17)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m08s (6m41s)
    • Steps: 11,768 (8,400)
    • Calories burned: 1,300 (1,034)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 160 (154)

    On the MapMyFitness challenge I briefly broke into the top-19,000 yesterday but was pushed slightly above that mark by people who registered their exercise after I did. I am still in the top 13% though – an impressive feat indeed, especially knowing that I did not do any serious walking or running until February, and it was not until March that I was getting out almost daily. As I have said before, I am not going to come close to the top of the leaderboard… but I will complete the challenge, and I will continue to compete with myself to be better than I was last week and last month… and certainly better than I was last year! The fact that I have run 90km in April amazes me (especially since I did not record my first run of the month until April 10). I will keep going until I win… not against anyone else but me.

    I came home and prepared my lunch, then jumped into the shower to clean myself off. When I emerged, I had enough time to get dressed and then prepare a salad before the chicken was ready. Had I just stopped there, yesterday would have been a success. I did not. Enough said. I weigh exactly what I weighed a month ago, even though I have been up and down a lot in that time. As long as thiis a plateau rather than my falling off the wagon then I am okay with that. I have made such incredible progress – I am nearly fifty pounds down since January 1 – that I cannot really fault myself for the occasional slide… as long as that is all that it is.

    While it is completely out of character for me, my suitcase is packed… or at least, it is as packed as it can be in advance, which is to say that my toothbrush and assorted sundries will go in this evening. I have enough socks, underwear, shoes, and t-shirts in Dallas so as to not need to worry about those, but my suit, sports jacket, vest, and shirts had to be packed. I am also taking a couple of ties, even though Leslie has bought me some gorgeous ones! There is one in particular that I will wear with my vest and burgundy shirt that matches perfectly. My carry-on bag is also packed – including several religious objects that are needed for the wedding. This evening before my class starts, I will give it all a once-over to make sure I have not forgotten anything, and then I will close them and be ready. Until then, I will just try to stay calm.

    I was supposed to go to the doctor’s office to get weighed this morning, but after a terrible night’s sleep I had a big balagan with checking in for my flight, and by the time it was resolved I had missed the appointment. I called and scheduled a new appointment for the week I get back from the trip. Unfortunately, that will have to be an afternoon appointment as I am teaching in the morning.

    Today I break my streak. My steps goal streak, currently sitting at 16 days, will not be extended. I know that jogging is good for so many things, but it has also been causing me to feel muscle aches in my glutes – the joys of getting back into shape – which can, the day of and the day after a good workout, cause discomfort while sitting for long spells. Knowing that I will be spending 4 hours on a plane tomorrow as well as the following day, I decided that caution is the order of the day. I also saw that my daily step goal has increased once more, now at 12,610 steps (up from 8,560 on Saturday). That number will continue to increase as long as I smash it every day (yesterday my goal was 11,490, and I hit 17,045 steps). I suspect that taking a day off from time to time is probably prudent. Additionally, after a lousy night’s sleep, my Body Battery peaked at 72/100 when I woke up this morning and is already down to 65. With my Uber scheduled to collect me at 3:30am, I know I will not get much more sleep this evening. I am going to take it easy and give my body time to recuperate.

    My plans for the day are to relax. I will be mindful and will do my best to not snack. I will have a single midday meal of a piece of salmon and salad and maybe some rice, but aside from that I will try to behave. If I do that, then tomorrow morning I will get onto the plane knowing that even though I did not do well the last ten days or so, at least I have not fallen completely off the wagon. I am teaching this evening, and as has been the case the last few times that I took early morning flights the next day I will try to get to bed and to sleep as quickly after finishing class as I can.

    Princess Sophie will have a fun eleven-day visit with her friends. She will go to Sue’s apartment later in the afternoon because we do not want to disturb her at 3:00am. I will not see her again until I am back the evening of May 7, which is sad but cannot be avoided. Right now, she has her best friend Charlie over for a play date, and they will have plenty of those during my absence. In the meantime, I am going to pack her toys and treats and food and dishes to make sure she has everything she needs while I am away. In the meantime, I am sure she and I will head out for another walk at some point during the day!

    I have this nagging feeling that I am forgetting something, but for the life of me I cannot think of what. Aside from my class this evening I have nothing planned, and only one errand (to go pick up Smarties for my stepson). A friend was going to come over for a cigar in the afternoon, but I asked him not to because if I do realize that I forgot something then I want to be able to deal with it without inconveniencing anyone else. I am going to prepare my lunch, and then try to relax. I still have a number of phone calls to make, but unless there is an aha moment, I am going to take today very easy.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 461

    I did not enjoy high school drama when I was in high school. I certainly do not enjoy it as an adult. I honestly thought that with no family coming to our wedding there would be none of the bull poop that often comes with it. Yesterday afternoon I was reminded that I was optimistic in that thinking. I am not going to lie and say that it did not cause me to eat something I should not have eaten, but it is done, and I am looking ahead to a better day today.

    I had a good jog on the treadmill yesterday. I was not wrong, the audiobook I had been listening to had not been holding my interest, and likely contributed to my getting bored and stopping when I did. The new book that I am listening to now is much more gripping (I have been on a Leon Uris and Herman Wouk kick of late, especially the novels about the Holocaust (Mila 18) and the formation of the State of Israel (Mitla Pass, The Haj, Exodus, The Hope). I had never heard of The Hope (and the sequel The Glory), but so far it is very gripping. Whether that was the reason I did so well on the treadmill yesterday, or if it was just because I was energized (which my Body Battery would speak against), I don’t know… but for the first time I set the treadmill’s pace to a 12-minute mile in the first few minutes of my jogging, and I kept it there for the entire workout.

    Jogging (Treadmill)

    • Distance: 8.12km (5.05km)
    • Duration: 54:17 (35:41)
    • pb Average Pace (Min/km): 6m41s (7m15s)
    • Steps: 8,400 (5,712)
    • Calories burned: 1,034 (600)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 154 (160)

    There are a number of issues that I should address about my jogging which might cause a bit of confusion for many if not most of my readers:

    1. I spend a lot of time going back and forth between the imperial system (miles) and the metric system (kilometres). I great up in Canada during the era where we were transitioning from the former system to the latter, so I learned both. I also spent as a child (as I still do today) a lot of time in the United States, a country that never made that transition, which included a lot of road trips during which I had very little to entertain me other than the world around me. I learned at an early age to do the conversion from one to the other in my head (100km=62.5mi, which means that 1km=.625mi, thus 5km=3.125mi). While all of my devices are set to the metric system, the treadmills that I use (both at my gym in Canada, and at the gym at Leslie’s apartment complex in Texas) are set to the imperial system. I have a system in my head for how far I am going to try to push myself which would be difficult to explain, but basically revolves around round numbers… either miles or kilometres.
    2. With regard to temperatures, I also vacillate between Fahrenheit and Celsius. I almost always do this based on which country I am in, so when I am in Canada and I type that it is 10° outside that denotes degrees Celsius; when I am in the USA and I type 60° that denotes degrees Fahrenheit.
    3. I use two devices to measure my running: my iPhone (using an app called MapMyFitness) and my Garmin smartwatch (using the Garmin Connect app). The two apps communicate with each other, and if I look at the MapMyFitness dashboard after logging an activity, it will show up twice. I delete one of them, lest it look like I have run 20km in a day when I only ran 10km. With that said, the two show very different results sometimes, especially on the treadmill. Yesterday’s outing, for example, registered 7km on the fitness watch, but 8.12km on the phone. When running on the street, I almost always trust the watch because Garmin’s origins are GPS. On the treadmill, despite my trying to calibrate the watch, I think I trust the phone more.
    4. Whether stationary or mobile, running or walking, the discrepancy between the two devices for the number of calories burned during a workout is always huge. There are times when I will record the steps and distance from one device, but the calories burned from the other.

    With regard to activity, I am currently on a steps goal streak of fifteen days, and I plan to extend that today. I noticed that Garmin has started increasing my step goal, which had been steady at 8,560 for the longest time. On Sunday my goal adjusted to 8,930, yesterday it jumped to 10,730, and today it is now at 11,490. I suppose this is how it was supposed to be all along, adjusting my goal based on the last few days (or weeks) to make me strive to keep doing better. I will smash through that 11,490 goal for today, but I will also keep an eye on it going forward… we will get to a time when that goal will not be so easy to beat every day. That time is not today though. I am on the fence whether I am going to jog outside or go to the gym today, but I will probably put on my long pants and shirt and run outside. It is sunny but a cool 7° outside, which is comfortable as long as I am dressed properly, and it is not too windy. I think I will chance it! In the evening I will go to Taekwondo, which will be my last class until after I am back from Dallas. I am taking a dobok with me and will try to practice. The good thing about being at my level is that I do not really need to go to the gym to practice my patterns!

    My plan for today is to try to stay on track. While my meal was not cheating yesterday, the snacking was. Yes, it was emotional stress eating, and no, I cannot let that continue. By being mindful of it I can make sure it does not happen again.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 460

    I am still having trouble getting back on track with my program, but I am also not falling hard off the wagon. Knowing that in three days I am going back on my modified program for ten days, I wonder if it is worth the effort. I will stick mainly to the program, but I might buy some chicken breasts and vegetables to make one midday meal per day. I know that I have been having trouble getting my Body Battery up above 75 (even when I wake up in the morning), and by the end of the day it has dropped to real lows – 19 and 20 over the last couple of nights. It is possible that with the amount of exercise that I am doing (which I do not plan to stop), my body is telling me that I just need more than the 900 calories per day that my full-fast program allots. When I am finished at the gym I will stop into the supermarket to pick up chicken breasts, lettuce, tomatoes, and onions. I will also make sure (before I go out) that I have the olive oil and balsamic vinegar to make sure I am not just eating a tasteless bowl of weeds with my chicken.

    Body Battery aside, there have been a few instances these last few days when I have stood up a little too fast and found myself a bit lightheaded. That might have to do with my low blood pressure (and resting heartrate that hovers around 50bpm), or it might be a simple caloric deficiency. It is not that I am falling over on a regular basis, but from time to time I do need to steady myself.

    Yesterday’s jog was 5km despite my lower than hoped for Body Battery. I pulled up at 5km, and then walked another 6.65km. With the exception of the 4th kilometre (which was into a strong wind and partly uphill) I did two kilometres in 7m10 and two in 7m10s, which means that if it was not for the windy fourth then I would have bested my previous best pace. As it stands, I still matched it. A job well done indeed!

    Jogging

    • Distance: 5.05km (10.1km)
    • Duration: 35:41 (1:13:18)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m15s (7m15s)
    • Steps: 5,712 (11,654)
    • Calories burned: 600 (1,300)
    • pb Average cadence (steps per minute): 160 (159)

    The forecast is calling for a chance of rain from 12-1pm today, but I had already decided to go to the gym so that will not be a real issue for me. I am going to head out shortly and will do my best to extend my steps-goal streak to fifteen days. I hope that I have an easier time on the treadmill than I did the last couple of outings; during my last outing I was listening to an audiobook by Mark Twain that I lost interest in, and the time before I had forgotten my ears completely. Yesterday I downloaded a new audiobook which I am already into, and midway through this sentence I made sure to put my earbuds into my pocket. As long as I remember to take my workout clothes, I am all ready for a great run on the treadmill. Afterwards I will go shopping, then come home to prepare my afternoon meal. I am ready for my class this evening, so if the weather cooperates, I might just sit on the balcony with a cigar.

    The countdown to the big day is now at six, and with one exception I think everything is taken care of. I am excited that I got notification this morning that my new shirts and jacket are out for delivery, and I am tempted to wait home for them; knowing they might show up at 5:30pm, I do not want to waste my day, especially knowing that in the worst-case scenario, they will be delivered tomorrow instead. I know that won’t happen, but I am thinking ahead. My dry-cleaned suit will be ready for pick-up after 5:00pm today, but my dry-cleaned shirts will not be ready until the same time tomorrow, and I see no good reason for me to make two trips… especially knowing that both are coming home and getting packed into the garment bag. My altered pants and vest will be available Wednesday afternoon, but that is not from the same place so two trips will be necessary anyways. Yes, I am extremely excited that everything seems to be planned properly, but that does not mean that I am not anxious that I have forgotten… something. I am sure that a week from today, after the dust has settled, I will be able to relax!

    I have procrastinated enough. It is time to get moving! Have a great day folks!

  • Day 458

    I killed it on my jog yesterday! Not only did I do the whole ten kilometres without so much as a pause, but I did it faster and stronger than I ever have. My eighth, ninth, and tenth kilometres were 7m28s & 7m27s. Every other kilometre was under 7m15s, with my first ever kilometre clocking under 7m (6m57s on the third kilometre). I truly surprised myself, surpassing my best expectations. I am not going to lie, that Body Battery measurement is either no joke, or a real psychosomatic trick!

    I decided to pull up at the 10km mark. I should mention that there is always a slight discrepancy in measurements between my fitness watch and my phone, so I always finish the 10km on both, and then use the slightly higher measurement for my records.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 10.1km (5.00km)
    • Duration: 1:13:18 (38:30)
    • pb Average Pace (Min/km): 7m15s (7m41)
    • Steps: 11,654 (5,900)
    • Calories burned: 1,300 (525)
    • pb Average cadence (steps per minute): 159 (153)

    I am now in the top 14% of the 2023 challenge, ranked 20,276/146,133. I suspect that one or two more jogs will get me into the top 20,000, but I am not checking to see how many people above me are within reach. I am rather surprised to see that in my age bracket I only today cracked the top 20%, ranking 5,033/26,064. Once again, I am less concerned with how I am faring against others and more concerned with doing better today than I did a week ago.

    After I pulled up from my jog, I was still 2.25km from home, and I walked the rest of the way. I am feeling good… and if I did not have things I had to get done, I likely would have kept going. The better me is on his way!

    My only cheat on the day was a cup of milk tea and half a dozen dried apricots which were laying around. I should not have eaten them, but I did, and I own up to it. They are the last of what I bought at Bulk Barn yesterday, and I will not be going back before my flight on Thursday. I am taking Gilad for lunch today so I might have to eat something, but I will not be going nuts on it.

    I was in the middle of writing the following sentence: ‘A close friend is going through some stuff right now, and his wife asked me to drive out to visit him in the afternoon.’ When my phone beeped with a message that he was admitted back to the hospital last night. I am worried about him, but that also means that I cannot go to see him today. This is a blessing in disguise, as the two hour drive each way would have not been convenient today. I would happily do it and will do anything I can to help him or her. Frankly, I would make the drive happily if only to hug both of my godchildren. However, I have a 9:30 meeting with my diet buddy, followed by lunch with my son, and with the four hours driving and a few hours visiting, I am not sure how I would have been able to fit my exercise in. I am currently on a twelve-day steps-goal streak (my best ever since switching to Garmin in 2019), and I would be quite happy to keep extending that for a few more days. I cannot imagine that it will last through the wedding (Friday Leslie and I are flying to California, and the schedule gets busy from there), but even if I get it up to seventeen or eighteen days, I will consider it a huge success.

    The weather is not conducive to running outside today which means I will be at the gym for my running. While it is forecast to stop raining around 3:00pm, I am not going to plan my day around the accuracy of a weather forecast. I bought a new lock (identical to the old one) and printed out the invoice to give to the General Manager of the club. It turns out it was less expensive than I remembered, but that does not make it a cheap mistake. With taxes the total is a few cents shy of $60, which I will gladly take in gym credit. I am tempted to print out a sheet to wrap around it that says ‘THIS IS NOT YOUR LOCKER! DO NOT CUT THE LOCK!’ but I cannot think of a good way to make other gym members not snicker at that.

    As I mentioned, it is raining this morning. It actually started sometime during my class last night, which means that Princess Sophie had zero interest in going outside. We got to the front door, and she slammed on the brakes. She did the same thing this morning, which means that sometime in the next few hours she is going to break down and say ‘FINE! I’ll get a little wet, I just gotta pee.’ I will have to watch her when Julie is here, but she is generally a good girl and has not had an accident in the house ever unless she was sick… and that only happened once or twice.

    I was quite happy when the bathroom scale reported another loss of 2.6 lbs., taking me down to within 2.2 lbs. of my best weight ever from last Friday morning. If I stay on track, I might actually get to the 250 lbs. mark by the time I fly on Thursday, but if I do not then I will not be disappointed… as long as I am below 255 lbs. which I hope to hit again tomorrow or Monday morning.

    I have always been bad at keeping track of how different foods affect my body. I do not mean that I gain weight from some foods and lose weight from others. I know that these last couple of days I have had only meal replacements and a few peanuts and dried apricots. Both yesterday and today I had very comfortable and productive bowel movements, and I am wondering if the handful of dried apricots were a contributory factor to that. I will never go overboard on them, but I will keep this in mind the next time I am a little backed up.

    My plan for today is to stay mindful. I do not know where my son the younger will want to go for lunch, but I am not going to use it as an excuse to fall off the wagon. Yes, I will eat something if I have to… but I will not be gorging myself, and I will be ordering smartly. After I drop him off, I will drive straight to the gym so that I can work off whatever excess carbs I ate… and of course extend my streak. Despite a less than ideal night’s sleep, my body battery was up to 82/100 this morning. While I am not as charged as I was yesterday (when I was ready and eager to run even while walking Her Floofness), I will still have the energy to get a decent workout in. I would love to spend some time in the studio working on Taekwondo, but my elbow is still bothering me, and I am not going to push it. I will continue my lower-body workouts for now and hope that my elbow continues to improve before I start trying to throw punches and blocks with that arm. As long as I can get through lunch with my boy without falling off, then the rest of the day should be smooth sailing.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 457

    I got back on track yesterday… mostly. I did have some peanuts after my workout. However, I ate them instead of my meal replacement. While I am still making excuses for myself, I did better yesterday than I did in five of the previous six days, and the results paid off. I stepped onto the bathroom scale to see a three-pound drop from yesterday. It was a relief to see my weight drop below 260 lbs. once again.

    As I mentioned, the weather yesterday was not conducive to running outside. I headed to the gym, where I had a frustrating experience. Another member mistook my biometric padlock for his own, and when his fingerprint would not open it, he assumed the battery had died, so he asked the staff to cut it open. When I got out of the shower to discover my lock was open (with my cell phone right there) I was appalled that I had neglected to lock it… but then, that is as unlike me as praying to Jesus would be. I got dressed, made sure that nothing was missing, and then went to the front desk to ask if anyone had turned in the lock. The staff told me what happened and were very apologetic. I want to smack the other member for not manning up and saying ‘Oops, this was not my lock… boy do I feel silly.’ But he did not, and so my locker was unsecured for however long I was gone. The world is filled with irresponsible pricks… here’s one more.

    I did take the opportunity to recalibrate my fitness walk on the treadmill. I would have thought the first time would have been enough, but over my last couple of runs I realized the discrepancy between the treadmill and the tracker over a 5km jog was almost 10%, so I made sure to jog exactly 3.11 miles (5km) so that I could calibrate it properly. I felt great and might have kept going, but I knew I had a lot of things to take care of in the afternoon, so I stopped there.

    Jogging (Treadmill)

    • Distance: 5.00km (10.08km)
    • Duration: 38:30 (1:18:17)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m41 (7m46s)
    • Steps: 5,900 (12,150)
    • Calories burned: 525 (1,200)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 153 (155)

    Wedding planning update: I spent the afternoon on the phone (or playing phone tag with) the bakery for the cake, the synagogue director for the logistics and catering, and the hotel VP of sales for the suite. If this sounds like it is just three simple phone calls then you have never planned and organized a wedding, and you have definitely never done it for a wedding that is being held 4,000 kilometres away. By the time all of that was taken care of, my mind was more than a little frazzled, and I was glad the weather was nice enough to sit outside with a cigar. We were not yet done of course… Leslie and I still had our meeting with the rabbi yesterday evening, which was delayed for unavoidable reasons, and which prevented me from getting to Taekwondo class as I had hoped. Following that call (which some might consider exciting, while others will see it as a trigger for extreme anxiety and panic) I realized I had a few more calls that I needed to make, including calling a buddy to act as photographer. I also had to make decisions about who to give certain honorifics to, and then call them to make sure they were willing. Yes, this is an exciting event… but never tell me that there is not a lot of work that goes into it!

    My plan for today is to stay the course. I am going to jog outside today as the temperatures are going up (it is currently 8° and cloudy and going up to 20° by mid-afternoon). My Body Battery is currently reporting at 90/100 which is down from the incredible 98 when I woke up but is still higher than I have ever seen it. I mentioned in the last few days that while I had not thought anything of this measurement at first, when I had zero energy to continue running last week, I realized that it was real. I confirmed that this morning when I was out with Her Royal Floofness; she wanted to stop and smell the roses (really the grass), and I wanted to run! She won out of course… her walk, her rules. When I am finished with this article I will suit up and go out, at which point it will be my jog, my rules! I feel like I might get a 10km run in, but I am just happy to be able to get out and go… for the twelfth day in a row, which extends my record steps-goal streak which I set yesterday. Woohoo!

    I am teaching this afternoon so when I get home I will remember to shave after I shower. I know I need it when my wife notices that I haven’t shaved in a couple of days. At 2:00pm I have a couple of friends coming over for a cigar, and it will be nice to see them both. Of course, I have seen both of them in the last week, but I always appreciate being able to spend time with my friends. How exciting is it that a week from today Leslie and I will be sitting with some of my California friends in the afternoon?

    While I am thrilled that I dropped slightly more than three pounds from yesterday, my weight this morning is still just under five pounds up from my best weight ever which I recorded a week ago. I would love to be able to stay on track for the next week and lose that weight so that I can land in Dallas at my new best weight, but as long as I do my best then I will be satisfied with that. Leslie and I had a long chat last night about my cheating, and how she can help me… and when she should be worried. It gave me a lot to think about. I think the most important thing is for me to meet my daily goals – when I say in the morning that this is what I want to do today then I should do my best to do that. Almost every day for the last week I have said I am going to stay on my full-fast program, and then promptly fell off it… even if just a little. My goal for today is to not do that. Stay true to the program and see another weight loss tomorrow morning. I do not know at this point if it is even possible for me to achieve my previously stated short-term goal of dropping below 250 lbs. before our wedding, but I am going to do my absolute best to get as close to that as possible. How? Mindfulness and focus.

    Have a great day folks, and Shabbat Shalom!

  • Day 456

    Falling off the wagon can hurt a lot worse than it has these last few days. It is time to admit though that if I did not quite fall off, then I have not exactly been steadily on the wagon either. I cheated (some wrong foods, but all wrong portions) Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. The only bright light is that I have still remained active. I jogged all of those days except yesterday, and even yesterday I got in my steps. I slipped for sure, and it sucks that I am more than five pounds heavier than I was Friday morning. Had I not jogged (or walked) it would have been much worse.

    You know something, that is not entirely true. Another reason I did not fall of worse is because I have stayed mostly mindful, even in my cheating. Yes, my portion sizes of chicken and salmon were too damned big… but they were still healthy proteins, no sauces. Yes, I bought a couple of bags of mini crisps which are bad for my weight loss… but I did not buy the Ruffles potato chips that would have been much worse (not to mention also come in much larger bags, which would have been just as empty when I was done with them). Over these few days I have bought both peanuts and almonds from Bulk Barn… but they have been very reasonable quantities each time. My second worst cheat was yesterday when I found a bag of almonds in my pantry yesterday (which should not have been there) which I opened and finished… again, it was a terrible cheat, but they were finished by 5:30pm, and I skipped two meal replacements in the evening to counterbalance that. Frankly, my worst cheat (and the one that bit me hardest) was the smoked turkey drumstick that I bought and devoured Tuesday. Had it been roasted turkey then the only problem would have been the portion size (which could easily have been three meals). According to sources, the 27g of fat also has 2,800mg of sodium.

    My goal for today is to get back onto the wagon. I plan to head for the gym around 11:45 for a good run on the treadmill. My gym is only a few blocks from the train station, where I have to pick up my cleaning lady at 2pm, and if I time things right then I don’t have to make the round trip twice. On my way there I will drop some shirts off at the dry cleaners, which I should have done yesterday had I thought of it. Yes, my new shirts are due to arrive on Monday, but that does not mean my old shirts are going in the garbage. As long as I do not make any pit stops to buy snacks along the way, I will be fine. Unfortunately, the gym is two blocks from Bulk Barn, my dry cleaner is attached to Fortino’s, and the cleaning lady and I need to hop into Wal-Mart to pick up some supplies. I suppose it will be a good test of my willpower.

    This evening, Leslie and I are sitting down (virtually) with the Rabbi to go over the details of our wedding. While it is exciting, it is also stressful. I also have to make a number of calls today and tomorrow about the logistics; If it were not for the time zone differential it would be slightly less stressful for me, but there it is. I am extremely excited about the wedding, and this morning I went downstairs to my storage locker to bring up my garment bag suitcase; While my regular suitcase has a compartment for hanging shirts and a suit, I have long suspected that for this trip I would be better suited (no pun intended) with the luggage designed for that purpose.

    Leslie made a great point this morning… I need special fun socks for the wedding! We went through some options online and picked out the perfect pair. One more job that I had almost neglected is now done!

    My plan for today is to get through it without any cheats. I will hit the treadmill at the gym, followed by a hydro massage and then shower, sauna, shower. My cleaning lady will be here in the afternoon, and while she is here, I will make some of my calls about the logistics. If the weather cooperates, I might also have a cigar on the balcony while she is here. Following the call with the rabbi, I will head to Taekwondo, where I will likely take it easy because of my elbow, which is still in a lot of pain (although much less so for the Aspirin). If I can get all of this done, plus my errands, then I know that when I step onto the bathroom scale tomorrow morning, I will weigh less than I did today.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 454

    Today is Yom HaShoah. It is the day every year that Jews set aside to remember the Holocaust. Perhaps it would be more accurate to write commemorate, as for most of us – at least those of my generation – seldom does a day pass when we do not remember it. There are reminders everywhere if you know what to look for. If that makes it sound like we are all wallowing in misery, let me clarify; it is vital that we remember because if we do not, and if we do not teach our children about it, then it is bound to happen again. I have stories that I will not share here of encounters with survivors. I remember meeting them as a child, as a soldier. So many encounters with so many incredible people who, when I was lucky enough, would share their stories with me. More than one of those stories changed my life. It has been seventy-eight years since the camps were liberated; the survivors who are still with us are octogenarians (and nonagenarians). They have seen so much, but one day they will all be gone, and it will be my generation’s responsibility to continue to share their stories. We must never forget.

    Sometimes you fall off the wagon, and getting back on track is painful and grueling. I spent three days off my program (although still jogging), and I was determined to get back onto it yesterday. As I said I would, I walked the kilometre to the post office to ship my package. I also bought a bundle of pocket tissues because it was raining, and I could already feel my nose dripping. As I walked out of the pharmacy, I started my run. I honestly did not know how far I would be able to go and did not set out with any particular course in mind. I wanted to extend my current streak of hitting my steps goal, and the fact that it was raining a little would not stop me. That I felt a weird and nagging ache in my hip would not stop me, as long as I stayed true to my self-promise that I would listen to my body. I had almost arrived at Guelph Line, but rather than crossing the shopping centre parking lot and then the thoroughfare, I turned down onto the walking/biking path (which would take me to that same street in a few moments anyways). I crossed Guelph Line, staying with the off-road paved path. I knew there were several streets onto which I could turn up when I realized I was running out of steam. I was not entirely sure where the path ultimately led, but I was sure I would not find out on this outing.

    Something strange happened on my run yesterday. I have jogged over 5km something like 30 times in the last couple of months, whether on the streets or treadmill. Every time I do, I pull up for a break for just a minute or two every couple of kilometres, sometimes every kilometre. At a certain point I realized the walking/biking path was coming to an end. I saw Costco in the distance, and tried to reconcile where exactly that was. Oh, right… North Service Road near the corner of Brant Street, which means the path had curved down a bit. Okay, should I stop? No, not yet. It’s still raining a bit… maybe I’ll pop into a store and get dry for a moment? I know I don’t have my Costco membership card with me, and anyways if I turn up Brant then maybe I will stop into one of the stores at the corner of Mount Royal. What happens if I stop, and my hip locks up? I would have to take an Uber home, and that is not what I want to do. Maybe I’ll just keep going for another kilometre. We’ll see.

    The only time I paused my trackers during the entire outing yesterday was when I was stopped at a red light at the corner of Guelph Line (on the return trip). I peaked down and I was 7.5km into my run. I was stopped for fifteen seconds. I realized at a certain point that it might have been my first jog over 5km during which I did not stop to rest. If I can keep that up, then who knows? Maybe there is hope for me yet!

    Jogging

    • Distance: 10.08km (5.18km)
    • Duration: 1:18:17 (39:58)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m46s (7m43s)
    • Steps: 12,150 (6,120)
    • Calories burned: 1,200 (600)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 155 (153)

    I should also note that my per-kilometre pace was below 8m0s for every kilometre except one; for reasons likely pertaining to wind and elevation, the seventh kilometre was clocked at 8m03s.

    Where does this leave me in my challenges? When I checked yesterday after coming in I was ranked 22,154 (of 144,259 participants), in the top 15.36%. Oddly enough, in my age and gender bracket I am not even cracking the top 25%… I stand 3,395 of 13,167 participants, only good for the top 25.78%. I do not know who the leaders are, but the leader is averaging nearly 40km per day, which leads me to believe that something might be rotten in the state of Denmark. I honestly don’t care though… If I complete the challenge then I am equally eligible for the prizes as he is, as they are drawn at random from everyone who completed the challenge.

    I have to admit, between the killer jog, my staying true to the program (for the first time since Thursday), and a really good bowel movement this morning, I was a bit disappointed that the numbers on the bathroom scale did not drop a little more than they did. .2 lb. is really just a statistical blip. No matter, it will come… I just have to prove to my body that I am serious about not cheating. My only aberration from the program yesterday was a cup of Japanese milk tea, which I needed because my throat would not have made it through the last hour of my lecture last night.

    We always say that if you don’t like the weather in Canada, just wait a few minutes. As Her Floofness and I walked this morning in the near-freezing temperatures, more than one fellow fur-parent expressed their shock at the drop in temperature. I reminded them that last week was the anomaly, and that this is the norm for mid-April. That does not change the fact that all of us long for a speedy return to the high-20s, but that is not normal for this time of year. With a high temperature forecast as a windy 5°, I decided early that today will be a day to work out in shorts and a t-shirt… at the gym, followed by a hydro massage and a stint in the sauna. After all, what am I paying them for if I am not going to use the facilities, right?

    I cannot lollygag around on the computer for a few hours before finally changing into my workout kit today as I did yesterday. I have to be at my therapist’s office in Oakville for 1:30pm, which means that I will try to remember to bring my meal replacement with me to the gym so that I do not face the same quandary I did three weeks ago when I scrambled to pick up peanuts in my mad dash from the gym to the therapist and then to my barber. If I get to the gym by 10:30am then I should be able to get through a leisurely workout and then post-workout routine in time to leave and drive unrushed to her office. My buddy Eduardo might be coming over for a cigar later, which will be nice despite the unpleasant weather. We have not seen each other in a few weeks, and he just returned from Cuba with some goodies for me. I am unsure of what he brought, but if there is a box worthy of the occasion, I am still undecided on which cigars to hand out to guests at the wedding. He might just have the answer for me when he comes over this afternoon!

    This evening I will be in the dojang. I am so happy to be back at Taekwondo and wish that I had the freedom to do it more than twice per week. We must always be patient, especially when we are studying an art in which the mental aspect of patience and calm are so important. I also know that in mid-May I am starting a new teaching contract that will have me teaching the two evenings when I am usually able to go to the dojang, and that will continue through mid-July. I will be speaking with the Master to ask him if there might be some accommodation that can be made for me to train outside the hours of the adult/Black Belt classes… after all, I should not need anything other than the gym. If that is not possible, then I could also use one of the studios at my gym for the same purpose – after all, didn’t I write just two paragraphs ago that I should be using the facilities as long as I am paying for them? Maybe I will speak with the gym manager today to ask if that would be alright. I cannot imagine it would be an issue.

    I found out this morning that a close friend is in the hospital, and I am worried. I spoke with his wife, and she assured me that it was not a heart attack, but the doctors still need to run some more tests to figure out what is going on. In the meantime, my buddy is nearly thirteen years my junior, but I have thought on several occasions that he is working himself into an early grave. I have one more person to pray for today. Four, actually… I will pray for his wife and my godchildren as well (although I always do, but not with the specificity I will today). This is just one more reason why I am glad that I am getting myself into better shape and taking care of my health. I do not want Leslie to have to call an ambulance for me because I am on the floor clutching my chest.

    Okay, it is time to get moving. Today will be my second day true to the program, although if I need to grab something, it will be a very small handful of nuts. With a morning workout and an evening Taekwondo class I would not begrudge myself that if it is needed. Tomorrow through Friday I might be able to jog outside, although Friday through Sunday they are predicting rain. We’ll see. Today is a gym day for sure.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 453

    I am not sure why I was unable to stay on my program for the last three days. I am just glad that my dedication to staying active, to jogging and when I can’t jog anymore then to walking, has stopped me gaining more weight than I did. Despite falling off my program these last three days, I am still just over 3 lbs. up from my best weight ever (recorded Friday). Knowing what I ate Friday and Saturday and Sunday, it would have been much worse had I cheated and not stayed active.

    I wrote yesterday about my streaks, and sure enough I was able to continue to creep toward my best ever walking streak, which was a 10-day period that I spent in Havana leading up to the pandemic. Yesterday was my seventh day meeting my steps target (which Garmin has set at 8,560 steps per day), and I plan to keep going all week. The thing is, when I set that streak in 2020, Garmin had my step goal set much lower (under 5,000 steps per day). I know that while I need three more days to tie and then break that personal record according to the app, I have already crushed it, with just over 115,500 steps in that seven-day period. The Garmin app does acknowledge that last week is in fact my record for most steps in a week since I have been using it (dating to September 24, 2019). My most steps in a month was in July 2020 when I was living in California and doing a lot of walking, both with my dog and for exercise. As of this writing I am seventeen days into the month of April and I am not quite halfway there… but if you take into account that I spent a week in Dallas not exercising, I am not doing too bad. I would have to average slightly over 14,000 steps per day every day until the end of the month to beat that record. Considering my daily average over the last week is 16,400, I have a pretty good chance of hitting it… as long as I stay on track! (I should also remember that the last three days of the month I will be traveling with Leslie, culminating in our wedding on April 30! If it comes down to the wire, I will probably miss it by a few steps. Those three days I will have much more important things to worry about than my steps goals.)

    While I did not end up keeping my pledge to myself yesterday to get back on track on my full-fast program, I did jog. After Saturday’s record-breaking outing I decided I needed to take it easy yesterday, so just shy of 5.2km I pulled up and walked the rest of the way. I was happy to hit that, and with the 2.35km walk that followed, I still got 7.5km in before hitting the showers.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 5.18km (15.01km)
    • Duration: 39:58 (1:59:05)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m43s (7m56s)
    • Steps: 6,120 (17,850)
    • Calories burned: 600 (1,850)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 153 (150)

    I have mentioned a few times that I am using some of the challenges (both on Garmin and on MapMyFitness.com) to inspire me to push myself. On the 1,023 in 2023 challenge on MapMyFitness I am poised to crack the top 16% of participants today. That challenge gives interim badges, with my next one (400km) less than 60km away. I really feel that I am doing well, although I am also motivated by the tremendous weight loss I have enjoyed, and the great shape my legs are in!

    There are quite a few more challenges on the Garmin app than on MMF. Some of these are simply automated challenges from Garmin, which awards points and badges for each one achieved. Others are challenges created by other members who challenge each other, and we use them to either motivate themselves or others, or else they like to compete and look good. I never expect to win the challenges versus others, but there are occasionally good conversations in the groups. As such, I posted the following in one of them this morning:

    Well, I’ll not be competing to win this challenge, but I do not consider myself in competition with anyone but myself. My ‘Most Steps in a Day’ was October 1 when my wife and I took our stepson to Disneyland. My most steps in a month was in July, 2020… the last time I was really on a good weight-loss journey. My most steps in a week was the week that ended yesterday, and I plan to break that record this week. Thanks for the motivation, folks! I don’t care that I sit in 45th place… I want to be the #1 me that I can be!

    When I see people in these challenges logging 200,000 steps in a week, I know that I am not nearly able to compete with that, but they do motivate me to do better sometimes. There is one weekly steps challenge that I participated in for the week that ended last night, and while I was 22nd overall, it is nice to know that fewer than 10,000 steps separated me from 16th place… and that 75 people finished behind me. While there is so often too much chatter in some of these challenges, and I will leave the ones that are too disturbing (my watch vibrates with every message), I still enjoy the ones that I am in… even though I seldom win.

    I will mention that my list of accomplishment badges keeps improving, with nearly seventy badges already earned – six for running, five for steps, twenty for challenges. They really mean nothing outside of the Garmin Connect world, but when I see that one is within my reach I will push myself a little harder to earn it… such as the 100k steps badge for the first two weeks of April, my 15km run activity for April, and my 300k steps in March badge (which was earned by pushing myself just a little bit harder on March 31). They mean nothing after they are earned, but they mean a lot when they get me to push myself just that little bit harder.

    I made a decision to have my suit altered, so I made an appointment for Wednesday afternoon (knowing I need it back by the following Wednesday). I want to look perfect in our wedding pictures, and I do not think that having my belt so tight as to cut off circulation in order for my pants to not fall down is quite the look I am going for… nor the creased beltline of the pants that causes.

    I have done a bit of lollygagging this morning as I tried to get through this article, but it is time for me to publish and get going. My plan for the day is to stay on track! I have a package that I have to ship today, so when I am finished, I will change into my running kit, take the box and walk to the post office (which is actually in the pharmacy), and when I am done there then I will jog for an hour or so. When I get home, I will vow to stay on track. I have a few calls I have to make about the wedding today. After that, I am teaching this evening, but if all goes well, I should still have time for a cigar on the balcony before I teach.

    The weather has turned, and while it is not hard, it looks like I will be jogging in a light rain. I thought briefly about going to the gym instead, but then I remembered that I am a hearty Canadian with the right gear and the right attitude. I will have my meal replacement after my shower, which I know will be a bit late, but will not be the end of the world. In the meantime, I will get out there and I will get my 10,000 steps in… whatever the weather.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 452

    Today is the day that I break my previous streak. As soon as I pressed the publish button to send my journal entry to my blog yesterday, I received notification that I was on a 225-day streak. That means that when I do the same today, I will now be on the longest streak since starting on this journey, 452 days ago. It is appropriate then that when I get home from my jog later today that I will hit a seven-day streak on meeting my steps goal (according to my Garmin fitness watch). My longest streak on that is ten days, so if I jog (or walk) every day between now and then, I could break that streak on Thursday. I believe that my best streak this year is eight days, which culminated by recording 10,000 steps on April 2, many of which would have been while moving and shaking at the Taylor Swift concert. I would like to set a new best streak record this week… especially knowing that when I set that ten-day streak, my steps total goal was less than 5,000. For the past few months, Garmin has set it at 8,560… but this streak I have made sure to exceed 10,000 steps every day (with a high of 22,950 yesterday and 21,800 steps on Tuesday, and two other days exceeding 17,000 steps).

    I was reticent about my jog yesterday before I headed out only because the previous day (Friday) had been such a disaster. I was not out to prove anything, I just wanted to do my best. As long as I was able to get back up to what I had previously thought of as my minimum distance (5km) then I would be satisfied. Let me tell you, I blew that out of the water. I was about .5km from home when my tracker told me I was at 11.5km, and I was out of water. If I turned the corner onto Walker’s Line, then I would be home and hydrated in less than five minutes. I decided to pull up and walk, knowing that I would get to the pharmacy in under 1km. I have been telling myself (and writing herein) that the Garmin Connect app has a badge for a 15km jog, and this was my chance to earn it. I slowed to a walk until I got to the pharmacy, and paused my trackers while I went in. Disappointed they did not have a sugar-free energy drink, I bought a bottle of water which I poured into my empty container. I continued my journey (restarting my trackers as I left the store), and when my distance read 13km I started jogging again. Following the path that I chose it would be precisely two more kilometres to home. I took several short breaks over the 15km jog (really 13.5/1.5), but I did it. I got home and felt amazing!

    Jogging

    • pb Distance: 15.01km (6.23km)
    • pb Duration: 1:59:05 (47:51)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m56s (7m40s)
    • pb Steps: 17,850 (7,500)
    • pb Calories burned: 1,850 (633)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 150 (156)

    It is nice to note that for the running portion of my outing (that is, excluding the 1.5 km walked) I did not exceed 7m53s for any kilometre, and my average time was 7m34s. It is also nice to realize that when I arrived home, I did not feel the need to collapse into my bed (or onto the floor). I took a much-needed shower, and then I got dressed, made my meal replacement, collected some cigars, and headed out to Cambridge to see Ryan and the boys.

    I did cheat yesterday, which is probably why the numbers on the bathroom scale were down .8 lb. and not more. I’m okay with that, I did not expect to lose all of the weight I gained in my previous day all at once. I had some peanuts in the car while driving to Cambridge, and when I was there, I broke down and ate a couple of kebabs. While they were primarily protein, one of them had a very sweet sauce which means a lot of sugar. Oh well. Hopefully today I will be able to stay on track. When I am done writing I will head out for my jog, but it will not be like yesterday, I can promise you that! My Body Battery was 80 when I took Her Floofness out this morning, and it is still 73 now. That does not mean that I need to push myself to the brink every day. I will probably do 8-10km.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 450

    I did something stupid yesterday. I stopped for peanuts not once, but twice. The first time I stopped, I picked up $1 worth of them after collecting my pendant from the jewelers, who had called earlier in the day to let me know it was repaired. The second time was on my way to Taekwondo. I don’t know why I was still hungry after my third meal replacement of the day (and a handful of peanuts to boot) but I was, and I did not want to find myself lagging at Taekwondo. I picked up another $1.25 worth of peanuts, eating half of them on my way to the school, the remainder on the drive home from the school.

    I did something smart yesterday. Rather than returning home, peanuts forgotten, and preparing my fourth meal replacement of the day, I decided that the peanuts had been my fourth meal replacement of the day. I lit up a cigar on the balcony and called my wife. It was another lovely date inside the dreaded Rectangle Zone. In thirteen days, we will be together again. For now, we do what we have to do.

    When I set out for my jog yesterday, I was hoping for more than I accomplished. In the end, I pulled up after just under 6.25km and walked the rest of the way home. There are just days like that, and I am not disappointed in myself. Since returning from Dallas, I have jogged or walked just under 40km, which discounts my walks with Princess Sophie because I do not start my exercise tracking for those walks. How could I be disappointed by that? I have a webinar that I have to deliver this morning, after which I will hit the road again. I will try for more, but if I can only do 5km then that is 5km more than I was able to do just a few short months ago.

    Jogging

    • Distance: 6.23km (502km)
    • Duration: 47:51 (39:00)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 7m40s (7m45s)
    • Steps: 7,500 (6,100)
    • Calories burned: 633 (653)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 156 (156)

    My friend came over for a cigar yesterday, and the two of us marveled at our progress. The day that he took my Before Picture I would swear that the two of us together would have tipped the scales at over 850 lbs. We figured out that together we have lost about 300 lbs., and we look and feel so much better for it. He is a good friend, and when he had a mini stroke in November I was truly scared. Yesterday afternoon we sat on the balcony and enjoyed a cigar, talked about life and everything, and realized that with our progress, we would be around to do that for a lot more years.

    Occasionally I will step onto the bathroom scale at night. I do not save the record, but I know that whatever I weigh before bed will be on average two pounds heavier than what I will weigh in the morning. It is not often that the numbers at night are lower than they were that morning, but that was the case last night. At 11:30pm my weight matched my best weight ever from March 31. Imagine, I thought, how I would feel if indeed I dropped a couple of pounds overnight? Well, it was not a full two pounds, but I was 1.6 lbs. lighter this morning than I was yesterday, putting me solidly back into my best weight ever category. It feels amazing knowing that I weigh less than I have in over twenty years! I want to keep it up and continue losing weight until I am where I want to be. It would be easy to say to myself that I have done enough; to be a fifty-year-old man who weighs 250 lbs. at my height… do I really need to fit into my Army uniform? I have lost over 140 lbs.; my wife finds me attractive (and always has) … what am I trying to prove by losing another 50 lbs.? I am not going to say that there have not been times when I have thought that. No, that is not the plan. I am not moving the goalposts and declaring victory. I do not know how much more weight I will lose, but I know that I am not ready to quit. We are a little over 2.5 months from my birthday (which will be Day 533). I have told both Leslie and my friend that unless something goes seriously askew, I will be off the program by then. Will I stop losing weight at that point? I do not know. I only know that I am feeling amazing these days… despite minor aches from jogging.

    I am going to lie down for an hour. I did not sleep well last night, and I want to be at least somewhat awake when it is time to record my webinar. My plan for the rest of the day is to jog, then after my shower I will spend some time on the phone with my beautiful wife. It is another gorgeous day out, and a cigar in the afternoon is not out of the question. This evening I will teach but will take the time during the break to light the Shabbat candles. I will stay mindful and focused, and with that I should be able to stay on track.

    Have a great day folks!