Category: Despair
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Day 1236
Last night was my third straight night with a sleep score int he 50s. I did not get to bed nearly when I should have, and that is on me. Hopefully this evening I will do better.
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Day 1235
I am ashamed and embarrassed that I went to see my Hong Kong tailor yesterday to have larger shirts and a larger jacket made. I hate myself. With the emotional garbage that I am going through these days it is little wonder that I am having trouble with my diet, but that does not make…
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Day 1234
I did not have the same kind of headache this morning that I did yesterday, but there was a bit of it in there. Then again, then again my sleep score was in the toilet so I wonder if that might have something to do with it. Today is her birthday. I will celebrate by…
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Day 1232
My sleep score last night was the highest it has been since mid-April. It was luxuriant to wake up after eight hours of restful sleep… a real relief. I can only hope that it is the beginning of a trend, and not a single plot on a graph. I have a lot to do today…
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Day 1231
I know I keep saying this but I need to get back on track. What do I need: I am not even going to address my emotional issues… more on that later. My work life, which had been a disaster for months until February, seems to be back on track. January was still not a…
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Day 1226
My sleep yesterday was similar to Tuesday… I slept for about four hours, then I woke up for a couple of hours, and then I went back to sleep for another 4-5 hours. After working on less than three hours of sleep yesterday, I am feeling much better (physically) today. Emotionally… that’s a whole other…
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Day 1225
Unlike the previous day, I did not sleep well at all yesterday. I went right to bed after my class, but could not really sleep. I might have gotten three hours of sleep but they were fitful and interrupted. I did not give up because I knew my body needed the rest so I stayed…
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Day 1224
By the time my class ended yesterday I was so tired that I was not sure that I would make it to my bed safely. At the same time, I was worried that I might not get the sleep that I needed. Sure enough, I slept five hours and then was up again. I took…
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Day 1222
For only the second time in a month my Sleep Score was an 83 last night. I had trouble falling asleep, but when I did I slept well. I was worried when, around 6:30am, I had to get up to pee. I was worried that Princess Sophie would not let me get back into bed…
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Day 1221
As do many adults, I enjoy a drink from time to time. I have for years followed the guidance that when I feel I need a drink then I do not drink. I have never wanted alcohol to be a crutch. That seems to have gone by the wayside these last few weeks (and especially…
Losing a part of me 