Losing a part of me

Category: Food

  • Day 233

    Okay, so I did not write about my walk yesterday. That is in no way meant as commentary that I did not walk, or did not have a good walk. I got back and realized that if I did not get ready and leave immediately, I would be late for my lunch engagement.

    I did not break any records on my walk yesterday, but it was a good and respectable outing. I did not break the ten-minute mark for any kilometre, let alone my average. I was walking on a knee that I was worried about, and did not want to aggravate it.

    • Distance: 8.21km (8.5km)
    • Duration: 1:24:56 (1:24:24)
    • Average Pace (Min/km): 10:20 (9:55)
    • Best Split-Pace Kilometre: 10m02s (9m45s)
    • Steps: 10.3k (10.3k)
    • Calories burned: 971 (1,033)
    • Elevation gain: 53 (56)
    • Average cadence (steps per minute): 122 (120)

    Hearing at lunch that Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II passed away was devastating for me. Many people do not realize that she was the Queen of Canada, as well as of the United Kingdom. She has been a constant presence in my life, with her face on the coins that I played with as a very young child. While I am sure it was not unanimous, I believe that her style and class made her universally loved and respected around the world. Long live King Charles III, but his mother will be missed.

    I have no plans for today. Yes, I will go for my walk shortly, after which I will come back to the house, shower, and then I will drive to the cemetery, where I will spend a couple of hours talking with my father. I will probably take a cigar to smoke with him, but we will see. I will probably have Lebanese food for lunch, which I think he would appreciate. Of course, he would be calling it Israeli food, which is just fine by me.

    In the evening, I might go to one of the cigar lounges I used to hang out at here… either Dreamcatcher (on the Kahnawake native territory), or Stogies downtown. More likely, I will sit on the patio here, reading my book, and quietly smoking a cigar alone. I am sure there are more friends in Montreal that I would like to see, but I cannot think of anyone right now.

    Tomorrow, as long as my knee is still cooperating, I plan to go for a walk on Mount Royal in the morning. At the end of my walk, I will go back to Esti’s house, shower, and then buy her lunch. She had laser eye surgery yesterday, otherwise I might have done all of that today. There is a difference between getting into the car all sweaty and driving five minutes to her house versus driving nearly an hour to get here. I suspect that if I do that too often, my car will begin to smell like a gym locker… and we cannot have that, especially not ahead of my five-plus hour drive back to Burlington.

    As I sit here writing, I decided to be somewhat luxuriant. I poured myself a second cup of coffee, which is absolutely normal (as indeed would be the third cup) back home, but has not been my habit since arriving in Quebec. I think it has been mainly the timing issue that has prevented it, and I am wondering if that might be one of the reasons I have been having trouble sticking to the parameters of my weight management program since Tuesday. I know that some people think coffee is only coffee, but it is actually a drug that affects your body and attitude throughout the day. I know that yesterday afternoon I met my friend Jess for coffee (at a very nice café in the Plateau de Montreal area), and I had a pastry with it. I do not blame the pastry on my coffee imbalance, rather on my mourning the passing of the monarch. With that said, I have made a few wrong decisions these last few days, and I wonder… and I hope that my daily walks will at least keep my weight from slipping too badly on this trip.

    I should mention that while I was not great on my weight management plan yesterday, I could have done worse. My father’s friend Arnie and I met for lunch at the Snowdon Delicatessen; rather than ordering the large Montreal smoked meat platter with fries, I ordered a bowl of chicken soup with a matza ball and a salmon salad sandwich. Arnie ordered a plate of French fries which he encouraged me to share, so I had a few… and I only did that because he doused them with vinegar. Really good fries with vinegar are one of my kryptonites! Even so, I ate much better there than I could have… and normally would have.

    Okay, I have used my writing to procrastinate enough. I just sipped the last sip of my coffee, and I should hit the pavement. I will grab my sunglasses and my water bottle, and I will turn on my music. As is my habit, I will first listen to the CBC news, but I think I can guess what that broadcast will be focused on. I miss her too.

    See you soon folks!

  • Day 230

    As I gushed with Leslie yesterday about the massive weight loss I achieved over the previous day, I did tell her that I was resigned to the fact that I knew that I would be giving some of that back today. Nonetheless, I ate well yesterday. I did not veer from my normal weight management program, enjoying three meal replacements and one meal throughout the day. I also went for a great record-breaking walk. All this to say that as I lay in bed last night, I was still holding out home in my secret heart that I might actually hold my weight. After stepping onto my scale this morning, I realized I had not held it. Indeed, I was down… nearly another full pound.

    Dropping below the 315 lbs threshold was an amazing way to start my day, but again I am not going to hold my breath that it will hold. Fortunately, I will not be weighing myself again until Monday, when I am back from Montreal. My hope is that I will maintain my current weight over the five-day trip; hoping to actually lose weight is more than I will hope for.

    I chatted for a few moments yesterday with one of the organizers of a party that I am going to on Saturday. I asked what foods would be served, mostly because I do not want to be at a party that only serves non-kosher foods, but also because I suspected there might not be any healthy options for me. I was okay on the first, but from what I can tell, there will not be a lot of diet-friendly foods available. I will do my best to stick to my meal replacements, but I also know that if I have a little bit of bad foods in moderation then it will not be the end of the world. It will give me incentive to try to be good the rest of the week… and even if I am, I cannot hope to succeed if I go overboard. My goal is to not go overboard.

    We are less than a month from the Yom Kippur holiday. It is a day when we spend the day in synagogue praying and asking G-d’s forgiveness. Last year, I attended services online. I just do not have a connection to the Jewish community where I live, whereas I have a very close one to the community in California, where I used to live. That is where I was two years ago, and that is where I will be for Yom Kippur this year. I was thinking this morning how nice it would be if I could attend services weighing 305 lbs. Two years ago, I weighed 260 lbs when I attended. I know that was a fateful and terrible day for my diet – it was the day that my steady weight loss came to an abrupt halt, and my fall into failure began. It started with a cookie and a shot of tequila. That will not happen this year.

    I doubt that I will be able to comfortably attend services wearing the same suit I wore then, but I do plan to wear that suit just a few weeks later. There is a picture of me from 2020, coincidentally at the synagogue, wearing that suit for the first time in three years. I remember clearly weighing 298 lbs and being thrilled that I was able to wear it. If all goes well, Leslie is coming to Canada for American Thanksgiving, and I would like to take her out to dinner wearing that suit. I love looking good for her, and I happen to know that she has a bit of a thing for a well-dressed man. For the first time in a couple of years I feel that I am within reach of being able to be that. I always did it for myself – I quite enjoy putting on a suit and tie – but this time I want to do it for her. She deserves me looking my absolute best.

    It is about time for me to pack up and drive to Montreal. I will be there several days, and again I have to remember that my fitness walking must be a regular part of my daily routine. I am packing several sets of workout clothes, and because it is September in Canada, I recognize that this will require several permutations, including shorts and long training pants, and long sleeve shirts as well as short sleeves. What a pain. At least the drive will be mostly relaxing… I have no deadlines to hit, so I can stop and smell the roses as it were. After an hour on the phone with the Quebec Ministry of Justice, I think I have submitted my request for my divorce certificate properly, but again, it is Quebec… so who knows? I am taking my passport and birth certificate, just in case I get a notice that I am missing a … I don’t know what.

    If all goes well with that, the next few days will be a lot more relaxing and enjoyable than I originally suspected they might be, and I will be able to just chill, walk, and enjoy the company of friends.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 229

    Happy Labour Day to all! It is ironic that on the Canadian civil holiday in August, I was teaching for an American company, so I did not get the day off. Today is an international holiday, but I am not on a contract so my day is no different than any other day, other than that the stores are closed, and I cannot go shopping… which is a good thing, I suppose.

    Yesterday in the late afternoon I had a panic/stress/anxiety episode. I wanted to cheat. I texted my wife that my defenses were failing me, and that I wanted to go out to eat, splurge, and indulge. Within minutes, my phone rang, and she talked me down from it. Actually, she reminded me that I had homemade baba ghanoush in the fridge, as well as a container of cherry tomatoes. I sat talking with her as I dipped my tomatoes into the eggplant, and when the tomatoes were finished, so was my desire to jump off the weight loss wagon.

    Later in the evening, Leslie asked me how my cravings were. I told her that I intentionally smoked a second cigar in the evening to help distract me from them, and my plan must have worked because not only did I not eat as I smoked (which I seldom do), I also did not have another meal replacement. My food intake for the day consisted of my morning meal replacement shake, my regular chicken and salad for lunch, a handful of peanuts, and a small box of cherry tomatoes with baba ghanoush. All in all, a reasonably health day’s food intake for a man on a weight loss regimen.

    I should mention that it really paid off, putting a huge smile on my face when I stepped onto the scale this morning. I mentioned yesterday that I was not surprised to have gained a pound following Saturday’s intake. This morning, I had not only recovered that pound, but was an incredible 2.4-pound drop from yesterday morning, taking me into lowest-weight territory once again. I assure you that this morning I did not try to step off the scale, and then re-weigh myself hoping for a better result!

    I have not been for a fitness walk since I am back from Dallas, owing partly to the weather, but mostly to a turned ankle. I am going to give it a go today, right after lunch. The forecast calls for cloudy and a high of 20° Celsius (68° Fahrenheit), which will be comfortable enough to wear shorts, even though I wore jeans and a long sleeve shirt to take Her Floofness on her walk this morning.

    Speaking of Princess Sophie, this evening I am going to take her to my neighbour’s for a few days. Tomorrow I am going to drive to Montreal for a few days, and while I would normally drop her off in the morning, Sue is leaving for her office early tomorrow, so it is just easier for me to drop her off tonight. I am going to miss her, but I know she will be in good hands… and will get plenty of walks, and treats, and love… and lots of play time with her best friend Charlie!

    I had thought for a bit that I would not be sticking to my meal replacement program while I am in Montreal. I thought that it would be a good opportunity to cheat. I do not know what made me think that, but I will not be indulging in Montreal bagels, smoked meat, and other local delicacies while I am there. I do not even know what made me think about it, but I know that it would be a terrible idea.

    I sometimes feel like I really do have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other, like you see in old movies. For a couple of days, the devil was whispering how nice it would be to have those foods that I love so much, and that I will only be in Montreal for a few days, so what’s the harm? Look how well I have been doing! Don’t I deserve it?

    On my other shoulder, the harp-playing angel is saying ‘Yes, exactly! Look how well I have been doing! Why would I want to spoil it by indulging in so many of those foods that made me fat in the first place? Don’t I deserve to feel healthy, to fit into smaller and nicer clothes, to look better? Don’t I deserve to feel better, to be healthier, and to probably live longer? What’s more, doesn’t Leslie deserve all of those things mentioned of me?

    I do not know if this is the first time ever that my better angels are shouting down the devils… and winning. I also do not know how long that will last… but I am going to do my best to always nurture those angels and muting the devils. It will not always work, but I am going to try to continue to succeed, and I can only succeed by listening to those angels.

    I realized just now that I have been all excited to get back to Taekwondo this week, and then remembered that I am going to be in Montreal from tomorrow through Sunday. I completely forgot that I need to extend my trip so that I can take care of a couple of errands. I do not relish the idea of having to visit the courthouse, but I need a document from there, and expect there will be bureaucratic delays in getting it, and so I will leave tomorrow and not Thursday or Friday. Oh well.

    I have to be cognizant of the fact that five days in Montreal would give me a lot more opportunity to cheat on my diet, and that doing so would hurt nobody but me. I have to be as good as I can be and stay as strong as possible. I recognize that I will be having a few meals with others and will be as diligent as I can be to eat well… or as well as I can. I will pack extra meal replacements, just to be safe.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 228

    I was not surprised that my weight was up a pound this morning. Eduardo and I were meant to eat lunch at a bistro that serves lovely salads, but they were closed for the long weekend, and we ended up at a Thai restaurant that we have always enjoyed. I enjoyed the lunch special of red curry beef, which came with a bowl of soup and a vegetarian spring roll. It also came with a large portion of rice, which I should have eaten less of.

    After lunch, we went to a new family-owned café across the street, where we had a cup of coffee, and I had a muffin. As good as it was, and I will tell you that this chocolate muffin was truly fabulous, it was a cheat that I should have done without.

    I did prepare a chicken and salad meal for myself when I got home, which was another mistake. Following the lunch out, I should have finished out the day with meal replacements. At least I did not do both – I had a cup of Japanese milk tea with my cigar (which I enjoyed with my son the elder), but nothing else. As I prepared for bed, I thought about having a meal replacement shake, but decided that I did not need it, and in fact I did not feel hungry until the morning.

    There is a huge psychological benefit to not being on-the-cusp. A week ago, my weight had popped below the 320 lbs mark the previous day, so when it jumped a couple of pounds the next day, I was right back up above that boundary. The ten-pound interval marks are milestones for me and knowing how hard it was to break through that mark was great… only to surrender it the next morning. Wednesday morning, I dropped below it, and have stayed below it every day since. Yes, this morning I gained a pound back… but I went from 317lbs to 318lbs, and not from 319.6lbs to 320.6lbs. If anyone asks, I am still below that mark. I did not feel like an utter failure, if only because my weight did not jump above a mark that probably only exists in my head.

    Speaking of things that drop: The high temperature in Burlington yesterday was 31° Celsius (88° Fahrenheit). Today’s predicted high is 23°C (73°F), a significant drop… meaning that when I got dressed to take Her Floofness out for her walk this morning, I knew that long pants were a good idea. I almost dug a pair of Dockers out when I realized… Yes! I pulled out a pair of Levi’s 501 jeans. Not only do they fit, they might even be a bit loose. I do know that the belt that I have been wearing – the one that I tried to replace with a smaller size only a week ago, only to find out that it did not fit yet – is on the last hole in these jeans. I will probably have to get a couple more holes punched into it this week. Woohoo! I have to take a picture of myself to send to my wife before I go out today!

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 225

    I did not get nearly as good night’s sleep last night as I had been getting sleeping next to my wife. I do not think it is that the air in Dallas is somehow cleaner, I just suspect that I am more at ease sleeping with her. I suppose for the next three weeks I will have to put up with it. I did not really have trouble falling asleep, but I was up a couple of times in the night. That, before Princess Sophie decided at 6:45am that it was time for us to get out of bed.

    She did allow me to complete my bathroom rituals in peace, although I was… unproductive. Yes, it is an unpleasant topic, but when discussing weight management, bowel movements are occasionally something we have to mention. I will not write off the poopless morning to travel, nor to food – I ate yesterday. I just could not. Maybe later today, and if not, then there is always tomorrow.

    Speaking of travel and food, let’s review what I ate yesterday. The morning started with a meal replacement shake. At the airport, knowing that they would not be selling food on my flight, I bought a (small) can of Pringles, which I did end up supplementing with two bags of airplane pretzels. When I arrived home (later than anticipated, due to delays on the airplane, followed by my son forgetting to collect me, so I needed to wait for a taxi), I almost immediately went to the supermarket, where I picked up my salad fixings, chicken to prepare for dinner, and milk for my coffee. I also found (to my delight) that they had Salt and Vinegar Goldfish crackers, which have been missing from the store shelves (with no explanation) for eight or nine months. I like them, Leslie loves them. I bought five bags of them.

    I prepared my chicken and salad for dinner (while I will be back to my regular timing today, yesterday’s meal was the same old), and then decided to splurge. I opened one of the bags of Goldfish and ate a couple of handfuls. I will, over the next week or so, likely finish that pack… I will not be opening any of the others, which are all going to Texas with me for my beloved. I sat outside with a cigar, and as I prepared for bed, I had one last meal replacement shake to curb my hunger.

    With the cheating I did yesterday, I was expecting that my weight would be at least slightly up this morning. Not so, I was actually down 2/10ths of a pound. I do not know if I was truly excited, but I was certainly relieved that after traveling and with my cheating that I did not gain weight.

    Today is the first day of September, and while autumn does not start until the 21st, I have always seen the 1st of September as a boundary. We have crossed over from the completely summer month of August into the soon-to-be-fall month of September. As a kid, school would start around now. The weather traditionally starts to turn now… or at least, that is what it always felt like. I checked the weather before dressing to take Her Floofness for her walk, and was surprised to see that it was sunny and 55° Fahrenheit (12.5° Celsius), meaning I not only had to wear long pants (which I was wearing during the day when I was teaching, but I have not worn otherwise in weeks), I would also have to wear some sort of upper ware to reinforce my golf shirt.

    I thought about a hoodie, but opted to go into my front closet instead, where without thinking I pulled my Taekwondo vest, pulling it on and zipping it up. As we hit the trail, it occurred to me that the last time I tried the vest on (Day 96) was when Leslie resewed the patch on for me, and it did not come close to fitting me. There was easily over an inch between the zipper sides. While it is a little tight, it zips up without any issues. This is a huge non-scale victory for me!

    Speaking of that, I renewed my membership to Taekwondo Ontario today for another year. I also reached out to Taekwondo Canada to find out where I can purchase gear, including new patches. I do not think I want to replace my current patch, only because it has the old name of the organization on it (World Taekwondo Federation has been renamed World Taekwondo – WTF has become WT), and I like having WTF on my uniforms and vest.

    I was thinking about sizes as Her Floofness and I walked. I remember more than twenty years ago I starred in an amateur play, and the man in charge of wardrobes made a comment to the effect that ‘fat men do not wear their pants right – you wear it all the way under your belly, when normal people wear them around their navel.’ Judgmental much? Anyhow, the thought was that because I do indeed wear my pants under my belly, which means that I am wearing a Size 40, despite having a waist that is about 56” around the belly. I am thrilled, by the way, to see that I have lost about 7” in the belly… but because I do not wear my pants there, I do not actually know (until I pull out the tape measure) how much I have lost there. It is only when I try on clothes that did not previously fit me that I can really see the difference… and when I do, I am very happy with it.

    It is turning into a beautiful day. My friend Eduardo is coming over in the afternoon, both for me to look at his computer, and to have a cigar. It will be good to see him again, especially since I know he has been going through a lot and needs a friend. Also, while I would rather not be working on his computer, I would rather do it here than at his house… my allergies have been kicking my butt today, and I do not want to add his cat’s dander to the pollen.

    Have a great day folks! I am going to try to take a nap.

  • Day 224

    I hate leaving Dallas, only because it usually means I am leaving my Leslie. Fortunately, this time it is only for three weeks. I will be back in twenty-two days, which makes me happy.

    Last night, we decided to get dressed up and go out for a nice meal. We went to her favourite sushi restaurant, and with regard to my weight management program, we definitely splurged. It was our last night together, and it was our opportunity to dress up. She looked positively ravishing in a cute and flirty purple dress; when she does her makeup – I mean, when she goes all out – she is completely irresistible. We overate for sure, including a splurge with desserts. As we drove home I told her that even if I gained five pounds from the meal, it was worth it.

    As it happens, I did not gain weight. In fact, my weight this morning was back down to match the lowest weight I was at on the third day of my visit. Before I flew out here, I wrote that a victory would be to come back to Canada no heavier than when I left. Barring huge and unexpected somethings, I should weigh less tomorrow morning than I did a week ago today, the last time I weighed myself in Canada.

    I did not eat as well as I could have during this trip, but I also did not eat nearly as badly as I could have. I did not make any fancy (and fattening) breakfasts, and when I was not eating my (usually one) daily meal, I was primarily sticking with my meal replacements. I had only one alcoholic beverage during the week, although I did smoke a good number of cigars. While the anti-tobacco lobby may frown on that, there are no implications on my weight… at least, not negative ones. I have said since the beginning that as long as I am not snacking with them, cigars are a great way for me to not eat, often when I really want to eat.

    I should also mention that during this visit I also went on two great fitness walks, which likely contributed to my weight loss. I was surprised that I was able to push myself so hard in the heat, but I did… and it paid off!

    As I was checking in for my flight last night, I was told that it was overbooked, and I voluntarily placed myself on a list of passengers willing to be bumped to a later flight in exchange for compensation. This is the first time I can think of, with many hundreds of flights behind me, that I want to be bumped. That would not only mean that I might get to spend an extra day or two with my wife, it would also cover the cost of my next trip down here. Here’s hoping.

    Barring that, I am now five hours from being at home with my doggie. I love her and miss her, but yes Sophie, I would rather be with my wife. Please forgive me.

    Have a great afternoon folks!

  • Day 223

    It was glorious to wake up this morning because of a lawn mower at 8:30am, and not because of an alarm ringing at 6:30am. Leslie was already up and about because she has to work today, but I do not… and it felt delightful.

    The bathroom scale has me down over half a pound from yesterday, which is good progress. Yesterday during the day I was good (although I did eat the leftover Chinese food for lunch, it was not a huge portion), although in the evening I did have a glass of whisky. Not just any glass of whisky… a really good glass, in a crystal tumbler that Leslie bought for me in June. We enjoyed a drink and a cigar on the balcony together, and it was a delightful evening.

    This, after a failed supper attempt by me. I had not pre-planned dinner, and although there were chicken breasts that needed to be cooked (they were a day beyond their ‘cook before’ date), I did not know what I was going to do with them. Deciding to experiment, I went the Tempura route. Leslie and I had gone to the Asian market on Sunday, and we bought Tempura breading, as well as the dipping sauce. How bad could this go, right? Pop them into the air fryer and twenty-five minutes later…

    First of all, let me advise you one and all that tempura batter likely works better on smaller pieces cut up than it does on whole pieces of… well, anything I would imagine. Also, based on the consistency of what is supposed to be a light and fluffy batter, it is probably one of those things that would really work much better in an actual fryer than in an air fryer. The hard shell of the chicken was neither light nor fluffy, although the few bites of it that I had tasted fine. I should also mention that twenty-five minutes in the air fryer would be fine for a normal sized piece of chicken, but these came out not quite done, and needed to go into the microwave for a few extra minutes.

    Bulldog sauce saved the day, and the dinner was not a total loss. Leslie and I now have one more funny incident to laugh about.

    Today is supposed to be my last full day here. I am supposed to fly back to Canada tomorrow, although we are seriously discussing pushing my flight by a day or two. We will see… it is always better being with my wife, and spending a day or two with her son would be very nice as well. That decision will be made in the next couple of hours… we will see.

    The next few days in Dallas will be cloudy with some rain, but that is definitely not a factor in my decision. If I do stay, I am really excited to make French toast for Leslie’s son, and to spending more time getting to know him. It will be nice. On the flipside, I have my neighbour looking after Princess Sophie, and knowing that in three weeks I am asking her to do so again for three more weeks, is another factor. We will see.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 222

    I did not lose any weight from yesterday, but I also did not gain any. Considering some of what I ate, I will be happy with that.

    Yes, I took an amazing walk in the morning, and got a lot of exercise. I burned calories as I pushed myself in the heat.

    We ate a delicious dim sum meal for lunch, which is truly a treat. I did something that I cannot remember ever doing with dim sum… I left some over. Leslie did not order too much, and when I saw it all when it arrived my first thought was ‘That’s it?’ but of course my eyes are still the same gluttonous eyes that helped me achieve the ridiculously obese form that I carried around so long. Could I have finished it all? Absolutely. Was I sated? Yes, I was. We put the rest away for today.

    Leslie has a great tactic she uses. When she believes I have stopped eating for nourishment, and am now eating out of habit, or because the food is there, she will ask me ‘Why are you eating that?’ If my answer is ‘Because I am still hungry,’ she lets it go. Otherwise, she asks ‘Do you need that dumpling, or onion, or whatever else?’ She reminds me that I am trying to break my unhealthy relationship with food. Yesterday she did not need to do that… with dim sum, one of my favourite meals, I suspect we were both pleasantly surprised.

    For dinner, we had a frozen meal of breaded cauliflower that was a Buffalo wings replacement. They were very tasty, but I suspect the breading is the reason my weight was not down this morning. However, it is a great starting point. I can take the idea of cauliflower wings and replicate it, either with no breading, else with much less breading, and add my signature (hic) sauce to them. That, good reader, will be a healthy and appetizing meal sometime in the future!

    Lunch today was the leftover Chinese foods… what little there was left from Saturday evening and from Sunday’s dim sum. It was tasty, but likely not very healthy. At least by enjoying them at lunch, I will be able to burn off the calories (and especially the carbohydrates and starches) by the time bedtime rolls around.

    After more than five weeks, my teaching contract will come to an end today. I had a really great time with these students, and this morning I received high praise from the school for which I am teaching, as well as from several of my students who are sorry to see me go. Alas, tomorrow they start learning subject matters that are outside of my expertise, and while I could fake it… I hate doing that. I wrote them all a very nice thank you note on our shared Slack channel… and tomorrow I start looking for my next contract. In the meantime, I will take the opportunity to enjoy my downtime, and will relax a little. One of the first things I did this morning was to disable my wake-up alarm!

    Last night I sat on the balcony reading. I am absolutely loving my new e-book reader that Leslie bought for me. I have always been able to read my e-books on my tablet, but when the sun is shining, the glare is insurmountable. The e-book reader solves that issue, and is a wonderful and thoughtful gift which will get a lot more use than just on airplanes!

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 221

    Following our walk, Leslie and I had a great day. We went to a mall to pick up a couple of things (and to walk around… but at a much more leisurely pace. The original plan had been to go there, then to the Asian stores, and then for dinner. What we ended up doing was going from the mall to Cigars International Superstore (where we had a fabulous time sitting out, drinking, smoking, and watching people), and then at around 8:00pm we decided to go get food.

    We had miscalculated how busy the restaurants were going to be. In the end, our only viable option was P.F. Changs, which is tasty but not great for weight management. We ordered well, we ate smartly, but the restaurant must order MSG by the truckload, because I was feeling it all night. My weight this morning is up, but it is a temporary up; just like the other day with the rotisserie chicken, I know I am retaining water because of the sodium. In a day or two, that will fix itself.

    Leslie made a very valid point yesterday that I need to learn to be able to have a very small piece of something that I like without feeling that I have to gorge myself on it. The example she gave was a piece of a chocolate bar that she was eating. I am afraid that if I have one piece, I will then want two pieces… and it will not take very long before I will be devouring entire chocolate bars. If I am going to break my unhealthy relationship with food (a phrase and a concept that I have repeated over and over along this journey) then I need to be able to have one piece… and be satisfied by that. If I am not satisfied by it, then I need to restrain myself. I need to know that I can have the one… but I cannot have the second piece.

    I should mention that I also had a glass of scotch at the lounge… I mention it because I do not want to leave out any transgressions. I should not have had it, but I did… and I enjoyed it tremendously. Fortunately, I do not have the same addiction to alcohol that I do to food; I was satisfied with the one drink, and was not tempted to order another.

    The forecast for the day is another hot one, with no shelter from the sun. I am going to go out for my walk shortly. Yesterday I wore my new Adidas shoes which were great! Today I will wear my Asics shoes, only because I feel it a good practice to not wear the same pair day after day. I have a quick stop to make along the way to pick something up, but because of the heat I will not be going for records anyways. The temperatures are going to be very hot today; it is already 30° Celsius (85° Fahrenheit), on its way up to 36°/97°. I am going to make sure I drink a lot of water along the way, and pace myself.

    Have a great day folks!

  • Day 220

    I ate a couple of things yesterday that I suspected would have a negative effect on my weight loss. For lunch, I had a Montreal bagel with smoked salmon and cream cheese. It was really tasty! In the evening, Leslie and I watched a movie, sharing a bag of microwave popcorn (with Dill seasoning). Again, it was really yummy. I am with my wife, and it is a very short trip. I am not going to go completely off the rails, but I do not expect to lose tremendous amounts of weight this week.

    When the bathroom scale showed me not only three pounds down from yesterday, but also below my 320 pound milestone again, I had to run into the bedroom to share the great news with Leslie. After a very good night’s sleep (the best I have had in a couple of weeks or longer), this was just the icing on the cake. Mmmm… caaaakkkee….!

    Leslie and I are going for a walk this morning. We are going to try to do a five kilometre walk along a path that I am very familiar with. The mercury is already flirting with the 30° Celsius, on its way to a high of 34°. That is extremely hot for Toronto, but not really for Texas. I think Leslie will make it just fine, and I am not expecting to break any records, just keep pace with her.

    Later in the day, we are going to go to the Asian markets… there is a Japanese store that we love, and next to it there is a Japanese bakery. We need a few things for the house, and Leslie needs bread for her son. Both will be easily accomplished there. Who knows? After a wonderful walk (and on a day my weight is at its lowest point ever) we might even treat ourselves to a Japanese doughnut. The problem is that there are so many wonderful indulgences at those stores, and I can only pick one cheat per day! Decisions, decisions…

    It is going to be another wonderful day with my wife, and I am looking forward to relaxing with her later with a cigar and maybe a drink.

    Have a great day folks!