Tag: Mental Health
-
Day 1276
Yesterday was not a fun day. The day actually started quite normally as far as things go, but then it went bad. I started writing as I usually do at the usual time, but partway through the second paragraph of my article I realized that it would be an article much more appropriate to my…
-
Day 1275
It felt like I was walking around with an anvil on my back from the moment I could not sit my exam on Tuesday until the minute I received an email from ISC2 at 2:00pm yesterday afternoon telling me how I could now rebook my exam. Precisely forty-nine hours and fifteen minutes. That weight is…
-
Day 1274
Last night was not a good night. I do not know what happened, but shortly after I got into bed I realized my back was uncomfortable… and then in pain. Between 11:30pm and 2:30am I got up several times to In the meantime I tossed and turned and just fought to get comfortable, which was…
-
Day 1273
I slept two nights since yesterday. I’ll explain. After the debacle that was yesterday I knew that I would not be going to the Grand Lodge event in Toronto today, but I had promised someone that I would give him something there. I arranged for a brother to drop by to pick them up on…
-
Day 1272
As I prepared for bed last night I realized that my hunger was going to keep me awake… especially when paired with my anxiety over the exam I am writing this afternoon. I am still studying, but I am at peace with the fact that I am almost certainly going to fail. Anyways, back to…
-
Day 1269
I made it through Day 2 of the program mostly unscathed. As much as I hate myself and my weight gains these last eighteen months (and especially the last three), I know that I have to force myself to stay on track because the only way that I will ever not hate myself is to…
-
Day 1231
I know I keep saying this but I need to get back on track. What do I need: I am not even going to address my emotional issues… more on that later. My work life, which had been a disaster for months until February, seems to be back on track. January was still not a…
-
Day 1221
As do many adults, I enjoy a drink from time to time. I have for years followed the guidance that when I feel I need a drink then I do not drink. I have never wanted alcohol to be a crutch. That seems to have gone by the wayside these last few weeks (and especially…
-
Day 1199
Someone asked me yesterday morning what my plans were for today and I had to confess that I did not have anything. I walked Princess Sophie in the morning, and of course I will walk her again in the evening… but that’s about it. I was originally supposed to spend the afternoon with a friend,…
-
Day 1197
Today is Yom Ha’Aztzmaut, the Israeli Day of Independence. I have a lot to do, mostly in preparation for the most useless exam I have to take tomorrow. It is a certification exam for the class that I am teaching next week, and it earns you a certification that I earned nearly six years ago…
Losing a part of me 