Category: Stress
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Day 1288
With my weight down another pound this morning, I am, after three weeks, down 26.8 lbs., and while I am impatient with my slowed rate, and somewhat disappointed by the week-over-week loss of only 3.2 lbs., I nevertheless have to remember that while my commitment to the program has not wavered, nonetheless my strict adherence…
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Day 1280 – Afternoon
I still cannot believe it. I left home at 11:15am so that I would be at the testing centre thirty minutes before the scheduled start time of noon (that is not only recommended, but ISC2 states that if you are not at least fifteen minutes early then you are considered late). I was driving down…
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Day 1280
I have been a bit out of sorts since I woke up this morning. I did not sleep particularly well, and I am worried about how that will affect my entire day. My sleep score was only 60, and I know I was up several times throughout the night. A couple of times to pee……
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Day 1275
It felt like I was walking around with an anvil on my back from the moment I could not sit my exam on Tuesday until the minute I received an email from ISC2 at 2:00pm yesterday afternoon telling me how I could now rebook my exam. Precisely forty-nine hours and fifteen minutes. That weight is…
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Day 1272 – Afternoon
I did not pass my exam. In my defense, I also did not fail my exam. I arrived at the testing centre as prepared as I could be, perfectly at peace in the knowledge that I very well might (dare I say would probably) fail the exam. At least I would know what I was…
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Day 1256
I am hating myself more than ever this morning. It gives me a bit of comfort that I am now committed to restarting my extreme program a week from tomorrow – the day after my birthday. Today another friend and I are cohosting a birthday barbecue for ourselves (as we did last year). Thinking back…
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Day 1255
I made a decision that I hope I can stick to. The day after my birthday (a week tomorrow) I am starting back on the full program. I have to get hold of myself, stress and anxiety and depression and despair be damned.
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Day 1247
I was not in much of a mood to write yesterday, which is almost a shame, seeing as I had my second straight night of good sleep with a >80 sleep score. It is a pity that the streak could not be extended to three days, but despite registering over eight hours of sleep, the…
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Day 1203
I finally got some sleep last night. I do not know what time I closed my eyes, but I probably got eight solid hours. It was magnificent. It was luxuriant. It will not happen again this week because today and Friday I have my evening classes to teach, and tomorrow evening I have my Lodge.…
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Day 1187
For the first time in years my rage erupted yesterday. I have been doing everything I can to keep myself in check, and while I have not always made the right decision, I have nevertheless been able to remain composed. Yesterday afternoon, shortly after I pressed publish on my very short journal entry, I got…
Losing a part of me 